Judge — December 21, 1907 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NEW DISCOVERY. Fohnny —“ Pa, the heaviest can never, at the same time, be the lightest, can it?” Father—* No ; certainly not.” Foknny—* Well, I've found that the heavy end of a match is the light end.""— Anaconda Standard. of a STRICTLY FIRST- 10 and Self-Player combined, ‘merits of the world: Intending pi CLASS Piano, should not fail 10 examin renowned SOHMER PIANOS and the “SOHMER-CECILIAN™ Inside Players. which surpass all others. logue mailed oa application. SOHMER & COMPANY, New York. Jasper’s Hints to THE LAST DROP. There was once a playwright who sat in the front row at the first night of a new | iece of his own. This piece failed. It failed dreadfully. As the playwright sat, pale and sad, amid the hisses, a woman behind him ‘leaned forward ‘and said, «Excuse me, sir; but, knowing you to be the author of this play, I took the liberty, at the beginning ot the periormance, of snipping off a lock of your hair. Allow me now to return it you."— Exchange. RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION. “Colonel,” said the reporter, “I am told that you once made a fortune in hay. Would you mind telling me the story 2” “The only foundation for the story, suh,” responded Colonel Hankthunder, ‘tis that [ married a rich grass widow some years ago, and I can lick the man that sent you to ask me that question, begad, suh !'—Daily Tribune. BATTERED HEROES. “What do you suppose makes the girls go so wild over the football players in preference to other young men ?” “+L suppose it’s a woman's passion for \ remnants." — Baltimore American. Mother poor doliy, child 2” Child—" I'm just going to put her to hed, mummy. I've taken off her hair, but I can’t get her teeth out."—Mlustrated Bits. NO FAIRY-TALE, The moral ground some men are tound To take is high enough ; But, after all, the highest ground 1s frequently a bluff. —Catholie Standard. COULDN’T LOCATE HIM. Early Morning Comfort Open your sleeping-room windows—let in the crisp fresh air—what matters it if Peary does get esid=you will sep better and t your room need not welcome heat is radiating from the feel brighter in the morning. dressing—a touch of a match and the Oil cold while LEARNING BY OBSERVATION. PERFECTION Heater * Whatever are you doing to | (Equipped with Smokeless Device) "The Automatic Smokeless Device preventsall smoke and smell and makes it impossible to turn the wick too high or too low. Cleaned in a minute—burns 9 hours with one filling. Finished in Nickel or Japan. Every heater guaranteed, T™ Rayo Lamp #sthesatestand best lamp for all-round household use. It is equipped with the latest improved ives a bright light at small cost, 1. Made of brass throughout ant eet the Heder from your dealers wate to ost central draft Absolutely sale Saickel plated, Eve "vo Lamp and Perfectiva Heater irom you nearest agency. STANDARD OIL COMPANY (Incorporated) Exuberant traveler— By Jove! your face seems familiar, Where in hades have | met you?” Unresponsive “chief "—" Wh of hades do you come from, sir? Sketch. A WHOLESOME INFLUENCE. Old Santa Claus still makes a hit, His efforts he will join With Uncle Sam's, and help a bit In circulating coin. — Washington Star. INCONVENIENT AT LEAST. “You should sleep on your right side, madam.” “T really can't do it, doctor. My hus- band talks in his sleep, and I can't hear a thing with my left ear."— Comic Cuts. Money-makers The most liberal offer ever made by a publishing company FH & & & for an Architect’s book of plans # % KH Ghe 1907 EDITION JUST OUT This book will save you from $100 to $500 on your new house Do you ever make investments in if you build after one of Glenn Lyle Saxton’s Original Plans, ‘Wall Street securities? Do you ever buy or sell stocks or bonds? If s0, do not fail to read “ Jasper’s Hints to Money-makers” every week in “Les- e's Weekly,” in which questions re- garding stocks and bonds are honestly and conservatively answered, and hints given as to the outlook in the stock market from week to w ek. ‘This is the most reliable financial de- partment published in the United States, and thousands have testified in writing that it has either made or saved them money. Bary a copy of ** Lealie’s Weekly” at your newadealer’s for ten cents, and see for your- ‘aclf, or send in a three months’ trial subscrip- tion to “* Lealie’s Weekly ”” for $1.00, which ‘will give you the right to free answers to any questions repardiog stocks and bonds which you may Address JUDGE COMPANY, 225 Fourth Avenue, New York. SEND $1 we-a0y 1° HOW TO GET THE BOOK FREE Avene, N.Y. City, for ‘this beantifal book “American Dwellings,” containe Ing hundreds of beantifal homes—the only practical, ‘usefel and complete book of plans ever published. ‘The plans shown fn this book are sold at a very moderate figure, and will save you the cott of an architect's service. Select your plan, send Judge Co,225 4th Ave., N. ¥., a certified cheek for the cost of plans, after deducting the $1 whieh y: ferthe beok. If you buy plans shown in“ can Dwellings,” your book will not eort you one cent, and ft ts. gift that yoa will be proud to make room for om your If- brary table, Send for this fimoas “American Dwell- inga”"—the only book of plans that haa an intrinsle ‘value anid will save you money, Published by Glenn L. Saxton, The Practical Architect, whose beantifal and original houses are built in every country,even {In the moat remote parts of the world. We have for sale by the same architect, Supplement to™ Amer can Dwellings,” containing hoase plans, #8 centa, 5 DAILY TRAINS FROM @ CINCINNATI—,2.05bY Pans FROM NEW YORK CENTRAL LINES comicbooks.com