Judge, 1907-11-16 · page 14 of 16
Judge — November 16, 1907 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains **primarily advertisements** interspersed with brief humor pieces typical of Judge magazine's satirical format. The main content includes: 1. **"Automobile Flirtation"** — A humorous list equating car behaviors with romantic or social meanings (skidding = crazy, honking patterns = declarations of love or nuisance). This satirizes the novelty and social awkwardness of early automobile culture. 2. **"Yes, Which?"** — A brief professor-student joke playing on double meanings (the student misunderstands "shells" as clam/pea shells rather than mollusk shells). 3. **"A Pastoral"** — A sentimental parody of romantic rural scenes, humorously depicting two working-class characters discussing marriage while sitting on a pigsty fence, undermining pastoral conventions. The advertisements include cigars, medical treatments (blood poison cures), and table water — typical early 20th-century patent medicines and consumer goods. The page reflects Judge's mix of light social satire targeting modern developments (automobiles) and human follies.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
There are fifteen thousand active accounts on my books That is, there are fifteen thousand men con- tinuing to buy cigars from me after they have given my cigars a fair trial. This is about the best evi- dence that I can offer that my cigars make good. There are almost as many reasons why they do. I will name three or four here. First, economy. My custo mers get their cigars at strictly wholesale prices Next, they know what they are getting. Every cigar is as I describe it. Another. ‘The cleanest cigar factory in America. Still more. Clean, clear, straight tobacco, No drug. ging, doctoring or flavoring. Next. All strictly hand made cigars. No machine in the world will make a cigar that will smoke as well as one made by the trained human hand. Another. Fair treatment. 1 never ask a man to buy my cigars until he has given them a fair trial at my expense. I manufacture every cigar that I sell, and my factory is not a little basement affair on a side street either, but a full size five story city Luilding -liter- ally within the business heart |" of Philadelphia, and I find it none too large for my ever increasing output. MY OFFER 1S: I will, upon request, send one hundred Shivers’ Panatelas on approval, to a reader of JUDGE express pi . He may smoke ten cigars and return the remaining ninety at my expense, and no charge for the ten smoked, If he Is not pleased with them; if he is pleased and keeps them, he agrees to remit the price, $5.00, within ten days. In ordering please inclose business card or give personal references, and state which you prefer—light, medium or dark cigars. My Panatela cigar is hand made, of clear, lean, straight, long Havana filler with a genu- ine Sumatra wrapper. It is the retailer's 10c cigar. I make other cigars than the Panatela. If you prefer some other size or shape, or cigars with Havana wrappers, permit me to mail you my catalogue, and explain more fully my methods of supplying smokers with genui cigars at wholesale prices. HERBERT D. SHIVERS 919 Filbert Street Philadelphia, Pa, BLOOD POISON FOR MORE THAN TWENTY YEARS Blood Polson Permanently Cured. bbe treated at home under same guar- o00. We solicit the most exhausted the old Throat, Pimples, Copper-Colored Spots, gq,any, part ofthe body. Hate or Eyebrows Yout, write for prools of cures. 1co-page Book Fres COOK REMEDY Co. 1480 MASONIC TEMPLE, Chicago, II1., U.S. A. uae AUTOMOBILE FLIRTATION. Skidding on one wheel—I atit crazy. Full speed ahead—I'm after you. Seventeen short honks—I love you. Seventeen long honks—I am a nuisance. Smashing into coal-cart — My father has money, Smashing into elderly gentleman—I am a wag. | Brought to a sudden halt—I am pinched.—Courier- Fournal. YES, WHICH? The professor— The jaws of a wasp are so powerful that the insect can cut its way through shells.” The student —* Bomb, clam or pea- While Rock “The World’s Best Table Water” nut ?"— Jonkers Statesman. Cough Syrup Is excellent for croup, whooplag nd colds. Mowers, keep it handy. asc A PASTORAL. It was a beautiful night. The gentle zephyrs of the evening played musically amid the silky leaves of the turnip trees and the onion bushes, and wafted from across the distant fields the delicate fra- grance of the growing cabbages and the far-off odor of the bean trees. “ Betsy,” he cooed, as they sat on the rickety wooden fence surrounding Mrs. Filligan’s pigsty, « ‘ow bee-a-utiful is luv! | Jes’ think ov it, Betsy, Wen we are mar- |ried welll have a pig all on our own, all to ourselves.” * Willyum,” she whispered resentfully, “why should we want ter buy a pig ? sha‘n't want ter buy a pig when I've got yew !" Then all was silent once more, except that the gentle zephyrs still played amid the fronds of the cabbage bushes and the silver-throated frog still sang from the roof.—Reynolds's Newspaper. If you need a bracer in the morning try a glass of soda and a little of Abbott's Bitters. | You'll be surprised how it will brighten you up. | ‘THE HARVESTERS. The youth who sows wild oats, Must reap as he hath sown ; But then his father ougnt to do Some thrashing of his own, atholic Standard, If you drink champagne because it's good, You're sure to drink the * Brotherbood.” Bat if you drink it for a blaff, Then imported is good enough. ‘The wine says the rest. Baorwenoon Cunsracne is made from grapes grown in the oldest vineyard in America, situated at Washingtonville, Orange County, N.Y. A QUIETING THOUGHT, It may be Hughes, Or it may be Taft— You may bet your life It won't be Graft. —New York Tribune. At every exposi have been brought into competition wi they have invariably taken the first prize. COUNTING THEIR CHICKENS, ETC. A good many people are so sure of happiness in heaven that they do things in this life that arouse considerable doubt about their getting there.— Somerville Journal, The way to keep your friends is not to| put them to a test.—Vew York Press. CAPSULES MI DY WILLING TO OBLIGE. Uncte (to little Bertie, aged five. who is being taken off to bed) —"* Good-night, Bertie. Of course you always remember your aunts and uncles in your prayers?" Berrit—"' Oh, yes, Uncle Felix. Shall | tell you what I say? I say, ‘God bless Aunt Kitty, and make her thin; and God bless Uncle James, and make him fat; and God bless Uncle Felix, and "which do you want to be—fat or thin?" —Punch. F YOU are thinking about Building a House an in- vestment of $1.00 now will save you hundreds of dollars in building a house, by get- ting the latest and most prac- tical ideas of the noted and capable architect, Mr. George Palliser. We therefore de- sire to call your special at tention to our new book just issued and containing over ONE HUNDRED UP-TO-DATE HOUSE PLANS THE TITLE OF THIS BOOK 18 GEORGE PALLISER’S MODERN BUILDINGS A new up-to-date book, containing over eae buséred plans (all new) of houses ranging in cost irom $500 $esoo0! als plana of Pubic Library Beatings, Sommer Motels, Stablen Fatfic Has, en ete ‘This book is a collection of practical designs showing examples of houses recently built, and in- Crilding, by reason of their having been, with very few exceptons, planned in the ordinary course of a busy architect's practice daring the last few years, and bait Various parts of the country within the prices given. Fall description accompanies each plate, giving sizes, height of stories, how built and finished, and improvements Contained, thes giving nbrentiox contemplating baild- ing, as the plans and design: y the best thought and most carefal study of those erecting them, ABIDE Peal revalts as to cont and a guide that is sate to follow. These designs and plana have, there. ' value that can be fally appreciated for their practical ublity, and stand alone as real examples ‘of how some people's homes are planned and what tney cost. 7 To those wanting homes of selling home-sites, members of building associat Feal-estate men, those having land to impr: who ever hopes to own a home, these them. It contains 115 large pages, size 11 x 14 inches. 20.” Dound in cloth, $2.00. ‘Sent by seal, ‘aif orders with remittances 10 JUDGE COMPANY, 225 Fourth Avenue, New York Remit by money order or check—don't send carrency. fm an ie % ‘very great value to eves comicbooks.com