Judge, 1907-06-29 · page 19 of 19
Judge — June 29, 1907 — page 19: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces about American masculinity and the Fourth of July: **"The Terrorist" (top cartoon):** A dark political joke about Russian revolutionary violence. Two figures discuss "De Russian Dooma 's blowin' up de bloodt'irsty czar"—referencing real Russian revolutionary attacks on the Tsar. The dialect suggests immigrant or working-class speakers, likely mocking contemporary anarchist/socialist rhetoric. **"The Progress of a Mollycoddle" (main story):** A coming-of-age narrative mocking overprotected boys. Young Smithly is called a "mollycoddle" (derogatory term for an effeminate or coddled male) by neighborhood boys. To prove his masculinity on Independence Day, he fires his father's shotgun—with recoil that stuns him unconscious. The father concludes he's no longer a mollycoddle but "the son of an idiot," satirizing both overindulgent parenting and reckless masculine posturing. **Context:** The satire targets Gilded Age anxieties about American boyhood, parental coddling, and performative toughness.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
i THE TERRORIST. Gee! what's de game?” “*S-sh! De Russian Dooma ‘s blowin’ up de bloodt'irsty czar." THE PROGRESS OF A MOLLYCODDLE. OUNG Smithly entered his father’s library on the morning of the Fourth of July and swallowed at a lump in his throat, and finally said, “Say, pa, the boys call me a molly- coddle.” Yes; I believe they do," dryly replied his father as he looked up from the paper he was reading. “In fact, I heard that lit- tle Jones boy call you one last night, and I expected to see you thrash him within an inch of his life; but you never made a move for him.” «But he might ae have thrashed me.” IN READINESS FOR THE DAY. “That's just F. Cracker— Let's go off on a regular bust this © where the mollycod- Fourth, Mr. Rockit.” dle comes in, son. I Mr. Rocxit—"' All right. I'm always game for a little blow-out."* told your grandmoth- er and your grandfa- ther just what they'd make of you if they kept on, but they would coddle you.” “Well, I'm going to show ‘em that I'm no mollycoddle,” said young Smithly. «They think they're big because they've got blank-cartridge pis- tols, but I'll surprise them.” «What do you propose doing ?" asked his father. «Why, pa, I want to take that old shot-gun of yours out in the street and fire it off just once. That'll make ‘em sick.” «Well, I don't know about that. That old gun is a good deal like our cook—we're afraid to fire her on account of what might happen.” The boy pleaded and begged in vain; but after his father had gone he emerged from the house with the shot-gun over his shoulder anda look of determination on his face. When he reached the gate he could wait no longer, and, closing both eyes and holding to the gun for dear life, he pulled the trigger. It was a double-barreled affair and loaded for bear, and it was fully fifteen minutes later when young Smithly came to. He was simply stunned, however, and as he opened his eyes he smiled and asked, Pa, am I still a mollycoddle ?” “Not much, my boy,” replied the old man with a sigh of relief, He paused. For a moment he thought of the folly of keeping these. rusting firearms round with their ancient loads. Then he resumed. * You're no mollycoddle, my boy, but you're the son of an idiot.” Asm tev, THE GLORIOUS FOURTH. ‘Swape or Georce Wasnincton—" Gadzooks! did | start this ?° comicbooks.com