Judge — April 20, 1907 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

POGRAMS. BY the offer to coach young writers, we suppose it is meant to make ** hack writers” of them. Though a wife lose four fingers of her hand, she can still «keep her husband under her thumb.” The statement that it takes nine tailors to make a man is denounced by all haberdashers as a ‘lie out of whole cloth.” Aschool-teacher who mar- ried one of his scholars says she is the * light of his eyes.” Still one of his pupils, you see. Mr. Rockefeller is coming to New York, after all, an- nounces a newspaper headline. Why, we thought he had it all, already. A contemporary says that it is hard to get safe and sane candidates on the Democratic trai Sane men do not, asa rule, ride on the platform. The Teddy Bears are sym- bolical ; for, what with Burton, Harriman and the Democrats who insist that they are with Teddy bears these days. “Yes, sir; | heard you. J.D. MILLER, THE SERVANT-GIRL PROBLEM. HE women of this country who are able to employ hired girls—that is to say, who have the price to pay them their wages if they can secure their services—are driven to desperate measures, almost to deeds of violence, in order to keep themselves from doing their own housework and cooking. The hired-girl problem is the one insoluble ‘Cuicnen Caonets \ with PEAS. ‘ | as? A CONVENIENT ALLY. steak ?"" back coll on. ‘Warres Two dollah en a quartah, sah!" which even money is proof against. A hired girl may be coaxed, but she cannot be bought. The women have found that out, and recently they have been coaxing. The latest in this line is Mrs. Josephine Dodge waskam Bacon, a lady who writes things for publication in the Customer—'*| don't see any prices on the menu. How much is a porterhouse p'tickler wuddent hev us." ba Yocaldent. Ie { load HIS POINTER OCCUPIED. the President, it is a great loa “Young man, | asked you to point out the way to Billville to me. Didn't you hear me?” And | will point it out all right if you'll just hold this calf." periodicals, and in book- form as well. Mrs. B.'s ef- fort to placate the recalci- trant and stubborn hired girl is unique and quite worthy of her well-known ¢ originality. She has written a magazine thesis on the subject, in which she an- nounces boldly that the mistress is to blame for existing conditions more than the maid is. She makes a very plausi- Peas . ’ 5 138 Biro—"' If you don't instantly ble argument, t00, cease annoying me I shall call up the pe and if she can make lice!"” pie as well as she can make statements, we speak now for a large slice. Anyway, Mrs. Bacon has made herself solid with the housemaids, the cooks, nurses, and other representatives of domestic and house- hold necessities, and it may be safely opined that if there is a hired girl in her neighborhood whenever a vacancy occurs under the Bacon roof there will be a rush to fill it. Wages no object. Republics may be ungrateful, but hired girls are not, and Mrs. Bacon has touched the chord with a real pull to it. Now, look for a flood of such articles in all the magazines. There is more A MASHER THREATENED. Mure (the parrot, in a murmuring whisper)—'' His nibs has gota diamond in his of real human interest in the subject than in all the muck-rake stuff that ever was raked. NOT TOO PARTICULAR. Poticeman— Did yez want anny p'ticlar hotel, youse ?” Reuben Corntossel— Nah. 1 reckon a hotel what wuz tew