Judge — April 6, 1907 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIS ANNUAL GARDEN DEBAUCH, AYLY the suburban-looking man entered the seedman’s place and said, + Take this order, please.” Yessir,” from the polite clerk with the pencil in hand and a facial expression emulating that of the spaniel who awaits his master’s throwing a stick into the water. You could, in imag- ination, see the clerk wag his tail. “One package of cauliflower +Yes; but, you see "—— ‘Shut up! Put down what I or- One package of cauliflower seed got it? . Two packages cab- bage seed "—— but you buy plants al- ready "—— “+ Did you get my order to shut up? RESERVELEORCE Continue taking down what I say and Sne—" There's one thing | admire about the Rev. Mr. Holdforth, don’t volunteer any information. Three He always says what he means. & ’ 2 c He—Oh, no, he doesn't. When he misses the ball he generally packs of radish seed, two papers of let: yest pees toe tuce seed, one peck of onion-sets, a quart of seed pease, half a peck of bush-beans "— GRE AS'BAD AS "THE OTHER. Walt a ipttite | Now/iyo’ahead:™ 6sYOU must be crazy !" said the grandfather on the mother’s side. hat's all.” . “The idea of giving little Willie an automobile! Do you want the child to kill himself and everybody else, or wreck the premises ? |. where do you want it sent?” val ' if : pe cat nothing! D6 you auppiae'T want’all chat atu tie “Well, look at you!" snorted the grandfather on the papa’s side, tering up my library or kitchen or attic? Of course I don't. I've no time for that sort of thing. I just have the gardening fever each spring A CONUNDRUM. the same as any other golrammed idiot, and the only way I can reduce GAVANTS proclaim in candid gosh my temperature is to go and order a lot of rubbish like this, pay for it, ‘A poet's known by what he eat feel like a fool, and go home cured. How much does it come to? If so, how many loads of mush Would » make a perfect Keats? “Didn't you give him an air-rifle and a box of tools ?” Hurry, or I'll miss my train.” STRICKLAND W. GILLILAN, mm ll SMALLER THAN THE MICROBE. Mrs. Casey (Saturday night)—"* Give me yure wages.” Mr. Casty—"" B-but there may be some tirrible microbes on it, Norah.”* Mrs, Casey—"' Faith, Oi'm not afeerd av thot. A microbe couldn't live on yure salary.” NOT THE B. 46]5 IT true,” asked the interviewer, “ that you have the political bee in your PS said the prominent man sagely ; “but [ have the campaign V in my pocket. | For the prominent man knew well that the fond hopes of his friends were as | nothing to the fund dopes of his party. HE KNEW. Sunday-school teacher—* Who can tell me the meaning of the word «repent ance?” A pause. — Sunday-schoot teacher—* What is it that we feel after we have done some- SORGEIGE GOUELE, thing wrong 2” u ay rr Ace ae e Mary (who lives in @ flat)—* How dark it is! I s'pose the ittle Willie—« Papa's slipper. moon-people is prob'ly tryin’ to save gas.” comicbooks.com