Judge — January 19, 1907 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED WEEKLY 225 Fourrn Avn., New York. Cante Appness, Westexn Anverrisina Or; FOREIG: Fonornan saues-acunrs—/utermational News Company, Broam's buildi lents of FUDGE are protected by conyright in both the CONTRIBUTO! DRAWINGS descriotive letter-oress § insure safe and prompt return of material not a fe a stamped and self-addressed ert epted. nd States and Great Britain. ‘with all manuscrints, otherwise return of the Latter when founs unroailatle cannot be guaranteeds contributions sent to the Art Decartment should have the sender's full name and adiness % id in every instance be written upon its indroidual picture, and NOT upon a separate slip of p. rd Building, Chicago, Mh, sas Jopce. countries in the postal union, $5.59 a year. Chancery Lane, F.C L Infringement of this be promptly and rigorously rrosecute. ale sketch. The accompanying foke o Il amount of postage (s also required, 10 1 JUDGE cannot be found at any news-stand, the publishers will be under obligations if that fact be promptly reported on postal-card or by letter. THE New York Sun feels so mad at Mr. Harriman that it almost approves of Mr. Roosevelt. EEMS as if a man could not have a better start in life than to begin as a rodman on the Pennsylvania Railroad. ON THE FINE ART OF CREATING HARD TIMES, THE COUNTRY is trembling on the brink of a financial crisis. Mr. Rockefeller is scared, Leslie Shaw and Stuyvesant Fish are wearing a worried look, and Brother Pulitzer has been spreading the shrill alarums of approaching industrial disaster. We are prospering, but the logic of fate is against us. We have had bad spells before; consequently we shall have bad spells again. And if again, why not now? This reasoning is so conclusive that it seems like obstinacy to go on even for a day in pros- perous defiance of it. Just why a few of our richest men should be the first to see the storm-clouds gathering should not trouble us. They may have their own little grouch, their wounded feelings and resentments, which incline them to see things darkly. Then, too, they may be short, stock marketly speaking. But that is no affair of ours. The important thing for us is to take up their cry of wolf and pass iton. There is no reason in the world why we should go on prospering. It’s ab- surd to think we are to be well off to-mor- row just because we are tolerably comfort- able to-day, thank you. When aman says I have had good health for ten years, therefore it must be that lam about due for a case of typhoid, his wife usually makes him feel ashamed of himself by the judicious application of a bit of home-made sarcasm. But in national affairs it’s dif- ferent. We ought to begin now to be hard up, for the simple and sufficient reason that we haven't been hard up for some time. Just keep up the talk, and get enough peo- ple to gabbling dire predictions, and all of a sudden, some day, we shall all be in the dumps, the hysteria will spread, and our change of luck will be upon us, One goose can set a whole flock to cackling. Meanwhile, cheer up until the worst comes. HO would think from its name that ‘ The Equality League of Self supporting Women "is just another lobby at Albany? EDITOR WATTERSON gives a whole page of his paper to the flaring head-line, ** A Greater Louisville.” How could the home city of Marse Henry be greater? 'HE new national church begun in New York City advertises that its headquarters are “* opposite Sherry’s and Delmonico’s."” Rather sig- nificant starting-point for a new religion. WIDOW'’S and widower’s club for the promotion of sunshine in be- reaved households is the latest New York organization. At a recent clubfest the sunshine got side-tracked and the meeting ended in a free-for- all fight. eee MODERN MAN O. K.'D BY THE SCIENTISTS. THe SCIENTISTS recently met in New York and O. K.’d us for an- other year. They report that the human race is doing well, the Amer- ican branch of it especially. We were compared with the Nebraska man, and the advantage was found to be all in our favor. Some might think the comparison unfair, since the Nebraska man is not all there. Of course it should not be understood that allusion is made here to Mr. Bryan. The Nebraska man the scientists are interested in lived several thousand years ago, and all that is left of him is a skull and a few small bones. It does not strike us as anything wonder- ful that we are considered so much better than this Nebraska man, since the ages have so wantonly and disastrously pulver- ized him. But scientists only need a bone or two in order to judge fully of a man; and while the Nebraska man was six feet in height, with heavy, muscular arms and powerful legs, the scientists give us their word that he was no match for us, who are now living. His head was flat, set on a muscular neck; his forehead was almost bare of frontal eminences and sloped backward from narrow temples. He had heavy brows, deep-set eyes, and his skull was exceedingly thick. This skull, by the way, was badly dented, showing that the Nebraska man ended his career in a row. It may be from this circumstance that the scientists have seen fit to give us the verdict. We should be glad to know we are growing stronger and healthier; that we can walk faster and-earn our living easier. The yellow streak in us is dying out; we take to crime more as a recreation nowa- days than as a duty; and, altogether, say the scientists, we are an im- provement on the kind of men who used to live here, say, 10,000 years BED: eee THE newest thing is a machine that will ride, glide, slide, float and fly. THE astonishment of a good many people seems to be due to the fact that Governor Hughes continues to act like a real governor. WE UNDERSTAND that the delay in the insurance-election count was caused by the difficulty of counting Prince Prachakssilapagam’s ballot. HE sympathy of the community will go out to Mr. Rockefeller of New York in his recent loss. Mr. Rockefeller’s house caught fire, and be- fore the flames were extinguished his property had suffered damages esti- mated at five dollars. comicbooks.com