Judge — September 8, 1906 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A THEORY SMASHED. 46MY DEAR," said the man with the bulging brow, entering the house with a handful of fragments of china, “+I found these bits of a cup and saucer lying beneath our pantry-window. One may easily learn that they are bits of.a cup and saucer because, you see, one of the* frag- ments has a cup-handle attached to it, and these others are plainly sections of the rim of the "—— “Why, I recognize the pattern, anyhow,” interrupted his wife. “Certainly—most probable that you do; but if one were not familiar with the pattern the items I mention would be invaluable. Now, what is the meaning of their lying beneath our pantry- window?" “They fell there, and "— “One moment. That is just like a woman, to jump at a conclusion. Reason the matter out logically and it is simple.” « But any one can see "—— “Any one may see if he uses his intellect. ing these bits of china as a basis of deduction, I arrive at the conclusion that our house was en- tered last night by a short, thin man, who climbed through the pantry: “Mercy! Get the police !” “Nonsense! The man is not there. vindow.”" The man who entered was a short, thin man, because otherwise he could not have clambered through the pantry-window, which is a small one. With him at the time were two other men." “+ A gang of burglars !" «Just so. One of the men stood at the garden-gate, to act as sentinel for his companions in crime. The other man, a heavy, tall, muscular man, was with the short, thin man who came through the window.” “For goodness sake! Did you see them?” “I did not need to see them. The pantry-window is seven feet from the ground ; consequently it required a heavily-built, muscular, tall man to boost the short, thin man into the house, Once there, the short, thin man began his nefarious work; but fortunately the gang was frightened away before they secured any plunder.” + How “—— JUDGE'S FAVORITES. PRANCES ALEXANDER IN ‘THE SOCIAL WHIRL ‘AT THE NEW YORK CASINO. You are the girl of nineteen, O— Nineteen-o-and-six, ‘tis true. And yet that don’t You charming girl of nineteen, O! “Thus. The short, thin man was handing this cup and saucer to his partner on the ground when the one at the garden-gate heard some one approaching and whistled a warning. The heavy, tall man was alarmed, and the china cup and saucer fell to the ground before they reached his hands. The crash doubtless made them fear that the neighborhood would be alarmed, and the short, thin man leaped from the window, and all three of them made their escape. Now, my dear, you see how a person of average intelligence may make use of the most trivial details to solve the most complex problems and thus "— ++ Plase, mum," interrupted the cook, com- ing in and twisting her hands in her apron, ** Oi know yez'll shcold me, but Oi cudn’t help it at all, at all, Oi set wan av thim purty chany cups an’ saucers in th’ panthry-windy this mar-rnin’, an’ whoilst Oi was gittin’ down some plates Oi i "it fell out an’ bruk. An’ now Oi can’t aven foind th’ pieces.” After Bridget had been forgiven and had re- turned to the kitchen, the man with the bulging brow said, ** The crass ignorance of our foreign element “is becoming deeper every day.” AN ELUCIDATION. +6 AH!" sighed the poet, «she comes and goes, uncertain, evanescent; now appearing, now vanishing ; now charming us with her wiles and ways, and casting over our hearts the spell of her presence, luring us and leading us on to believe that she is ours forever ; again hasten- ing from us just when our clasp grows warm, just when we have come to know the dulcet sweetness of her voice; as fickle as a shadow, pply to you, as «What in the world is he talking about?” asked the large lady with the purple beads, in the rear seat. +A cook, I think,” offered the other large lady with the turquoise rings and the new lorgnette. IMPLICATED. sspyiD you have anything to do with this batch of sausages?” in- quired the Pakington investigator. Yes, sir," replied the workman, «I had a finger in it.” Dd Commence - «— THOSE SELFISH MEN. ‘Sue—' Henry, what do you suppose would happen to me if this horrible thing were to start off down-bill while you're down there amusing yourself?" comicbooks.com