Judge — July 1, 1905 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ACCOUNTED FOR. +s BUSINESS seems rather slack,” remarked the only passenger as Charon guided his boat across the Styx. “Yes,” replied the old man; “but there are a lot of dead ones that haven't come down yet. Look at the head-liners on the vaudeville stage "— And just then the boat bumped into the dock. TRUSTFUL WOMAN. Gtaps—" Why, Mr. Gayboy! your wife told me you were out of town.”” Percy. Did she? Weil, that’s what I told her, but | never thought she'd JUDGE'S FAVORITES. believe it.” EDNA GOODRICH. The world is very tame at times, UNCLE EBEN GOES VISITING. ‘And life ts dull as dull. LACK old Uncle Eben was a true type of home-loving individual, having passed No joy stirs amongst the chimes - nig! scars . is " * tales ee ett cea every night for thirty years under the shelter of his own roof, He finally yielded to the repeated invitations of his brother, a resident of a neighboring county, to * come But when we journey to your play over an’ mek us a visit’; and one afternoon, after a great deal of preparation for so And see you gayly smile . ‘. . fe " : otis ‘Tes orld erowe Gleruee egery say unusual an event, started on the journey. His departure occasioned considerable sur- And stays bright by the mile. prise among the neighbors, by whom the old man’s regard for the warmth of his own hearth was well known. + You'll be homesick, Uncle Eb,” observed a bystander as the old darkey strapped his gaunt, gray mule between the shafts of a rickety carryall and prepared to drive off. + Oh, no, sah; I ‘spec’s not,” replied Uncle Eben, scorning any such imputation of weak- ness. “Git up, dar. . Next morning Uncle Eb was noticed working about the old place as usual. hought you had gone over to your brother's ?" remarked the quizzical neigh- bor who had watched him set out the day before. “Well, sah,” re- turned Uncle Eben, stopping in the midst of his gardening to scratch his white, kinky head, +1 done druv along a good piece ob de way, an’ den I reckoned I'd turn back home fo’ ter spen’ de fust night, sah." ED BARNEY, “AN UNAPPROACHABLE BARGAIN.” GREAT EXPECTATIONS. HE parson gravely shook hands with the deacon. “1 regret to learn,” he observed, ‘that the younger Miss Plumpley is going to leave the choir.” “Yes,” said the deacon, ‘She's the best-lookin’ one of the Idon’t believe we ever had a soprany in the choir so fine- “ Lunderstand she has an opportunity to appear in the drama.” “Well, she’s goin’ to make her dayboo in what they call a musical comedy." + Do you expect to see her figure prominently in her new pro- fession ?" : ie: a ++ Ido," replied the deacon. «I've gota seat in the front row.” ‘ad are Uf “ BZ By con heme NOT RECEIVING-DAY. f z YL —_— COLONEL TOUCH rang the bell of Senator Milyun’s brown- a stone fort on Goldbrick avenue. “<The senator is not receiving to-day,” said the butler. rai mite eee tees i ner ia rill Ee ALS EE Lee eis “*Idleness, my sir, curse of the younger generation. Why, If my Will you kindly inquire if he is giving ?" said Touch blandly 4, would do something like that I'd be perfectly willing to support him for the as the door swung to savagely. rest of his life.” comicbooks.com