Judge — May 20, 1905 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A MAGAZINE TRAGEDY. VE seen the Wide World been Everywhere, and am something of a Critic, On the Four-Track News | studied Public Opinion and sot a better Outlook on Town and Country. | came from Out West to mar- ry a Housekeeper. She had kept a Ladies’ Home Journal, was a good Writer, Cosmopolitan, Elite, and Everybody's Friend, and 1 thought her an American Queen ; Wut our marriage wasn't a Success—she had too much System to make the Housebeautiful. When demand Good Housekeeping \ got Physical Culture with a Vigor and Vim, = > That was bad for my Hetuly and Health. She was one of these /ar- JX, HOME ~¢ 2% per's on the New Thought and Woman's Sphere ant Humas Life, and not at all a Lome Companion. Wer Home Talk was about Art AY TET Te iD de La Mode, the Bon Ton and Cassell’s Little Folks, though Babyhocd GHAEER to her did not come under the head of Hems of Interest. Our Times ‘ js Outdoors, in The Motor, The Garden, or The World’s Work made aoa 3 me Quiver. So t made up my Afind Vd quit my Sis Hopkins and seek Recreation and a Quiet Hour in the Smart Set. Vd be a Bohemian, go in for The Stage, andl try to Cheer Up in the Public View on Broad TE MVELIN on a “ way, ut she cooked my Gray Goose with an ad. in The Police News. Keep acl Twas sentenced by Jupck, who gave me a Century. Lhadn'ta Nickell left, and didn't feel Andependent enough to fight the Metropolitan au- thorities in Open Court, or consult an American Lawyer; so L was given an Outing to help make Good Koads. Now | feel like a Philis- dine and talk like an eonoclast, am tired of Life, and haven't the time we "Tain't th avy bends thar 7 ter know where Got ter have ’ for Something to Read. NOT A SAFE ROBBER. Officer Frown — Say, that feller seemed pretty stuck up for a Many a tire ‘H fly off or bust, ze Hut keep a-chuggin’ common pickpocket. Sparkin'splug will rot with ¢ Officer Smith Ws the first time he'd been caught, and he'd Jest keep ac ‘. done it so often that he thought he was a safe robber.” Wut a das Hut keep aschuggin’, OF masheen ‘I get crazy streaks, ut keep Jam inter everyth Compensat Drive yer « Hug a cow or barnyard bh Tat go on chugy It’s jest yer yer liver, WHERE HE WAS WEAK. "said the mutual friend ; + Mrs. Rasper does not ery well with her husband.” asks the caller, # Is he jealous of her 2” 3 that’s just the trouble.” AUTO EXPERIENCE. She You know this is the first time [ve ever been in an automobile, Don’t you feel as if you could keep yo: ing on like this forever 2” He—“ No; Vve had too much experience.” SHE WOULD TEAUCHAMP. PHERE was a yes Jy named Heauchiamp, Whos seid to Twill teaucharny © than wy te reanchal FASHIONS IN HUSBANDS. 0 Mary is thinking of getting a divorce? | ti she had such a nice husband.” Dorotiy + We is nice in his way, of course; but, you AN ABUNDANCE. see, just that particular kind of husband has gone all out here's go little of the lace left 1 don't know what to do with It. Norah.” s Share. mum, wid some ribbon yez kin make two, or at laste wan, pake-a-boo of fashion in our set. waist av it.” comicbooks.com