Judge, 1905-02-18 · page 5 of 16
Judge — February 18, 1905 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several humorous pieces typical of early-20th-century American satire: **"A Contrast"** compares Venice's historical grandeur—where the Doge ceremonially "married" the sea by casting gold into it—with modern New York City's mundane infrastructure (the Tammany Ring joining boroughs). **"North-Pole Humor"** is simple joke banter between polar bears about melting. **"Busted Bubbles"** satirizes automobiles as unreliable ("bubbles" that burst). **"Sausage Sarcasm"** depicts market reversals: spring lamb oversupplied while frankfurters are oversold. **"Fable of the Thoughtless Alligator"** is moral satire—a shortage of dog hides forces leather dealers to use alligator hide as substitute, illustrating how problems create unintended consequences. **"Why He Crossed"** humorously suggests Washington crossed the Delaware to avoid "anachronism"—implying historical accuracy matters more than military necessity. **"A Patriotic Touch"** shows a con artist soliciting money for Washington's birthday, exploiting patriotic sentiment.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A CONTRAST, AVAS a quaint custom in the days of old, When Venice gemmed the earth's periphery, Queen regnant of the Adriatic sea, And treasured all the arts within her fold. Yearly the doge, with doublet sleeve uprolled, And standing on the shore in triumph, he Wedded the city with the ocean fre: By casting in the waves of gold. How different ‘tis in Gotham town today ! No Dandolo stands on its priceless grou A glittering bauble on the surge to f And yet five boroughs, sundered by th ‘The Harlem river and Long Are joined together by a Ta NORTH-POLE HUMOR. First polar bear—» Warm, isn’t it?” Second polar bear— I'm dripping icicles. ierce! BUSTED BUBBLES. “Pa, do they call automobiles ‘ bubbles * ‘cause they always bust?” =? \B PS wars A“ SAUSAGE" SARCASM. Trane poc—"' | suppose you feel stuck up because the demand for spring lamb exceeds the si ply. Srrixo LaMa—"" And | suppose you feel cast down because frankfurters have become a drug on the market.” FABLE OF THE THOUGHTLESS ALLIGATOR. NCE. there was a thoughtless alligator which captured a dog. and, despite its pleas, ate it. Now, the next day and shot the alligator into purses and gripsacks. “t's a lot of bother to hunt alligators,” dealer in leathers came along skinned it and made its hide ig id the dealer; “but there is such a shortage in dogs that we can't get any hides to make into imitation alligator leathe! This only goes to show that often we spread cobbles before our own glass houses. A SORRYNADE, SIE seeps my tady sleeps Her soul is journeying by sweet fancy's distant shores, Where some fair Hat is lingeri Jess frolic ke rey bec shores. WHY HE CROSSED. WASHINGTON was asked why he had crossed the Delaware on the ice, “1 couldn't commit an anachronism,” he explained, “Tt would have spoiled the painting utterly.” Perceiving the wise foresight of their leader, the sol- diers cheered him on. A PATRIOTIC * TOUCH.” Urceirs (to bunco- trymen, y’ know show your patriotism by giving me something for Washington's birthday. He was first in the hearts of his coun- comicbooks.com