Judge — January 7, 1905 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

fi | MA KNEW WHAT SHE MEANT. Muthah, deah, you should jh am THEN SHE FAINTED. ++ PARDON me, Miss Shogyrle,” said the young man with the busy ir and the sheaf of note-paper ; “but is it true just purchased the ancestral estate of the Mutch-Moneighs i for a summer home “Take a chair, sir,” replied the bewitehi life and ch Merry Vil at you have Vermont rle, the The Merry, lossy ‘m of the chorus in the reiy ge Maiden.” Inge success, The young man took the chair, then repeated his question. “Oh, yes," she said carelessl: last week.” pb believe TE did buy that place ’s in Vermont,” commented the caller, jotting down some- g- Have you acquired any property here 2" “L really can’t remember all these business detai of the Hotcash family “That is valu dred and seventy s, is it not?" “Some such fi “And that you have imported gowns aggregating thousand dollars, to wear in the opera in which you are to star?" “You have it cor- rectly, [ think,” she smiled, nibbling a bon- bon and reaching for « photograph, * And that your new automobile is a ten-thou- sand-dollar one “All of that, at least.” “That you refused five thousand seven hun- dred and fi your prize-winning dog 2" “Indeed, he is worth more than that “Is there else that I might list sIsn’t. that enough for one story ?" “No; we want to figure it all up.” + But that would be A trifle too much, Just Bescou Shancae put in anything you can Deacon Crose Painful? Thet g , Jamesy? Well, come back oily. e oily. He's afther goin’ automobilin’ wid his bo: think ot and Fight.” it will be all * Not with me, Miss Sho- gyrle, I want the facts." “The facts 2" Yes ; certainly, You will sessed for all your you know.” have to be propert sessed 2" ou understand me correctly. 1 am-the tax as. sessor.” “Great goodness!" she cried, dropping the box of bon- bons and the photograph she thought he would want to re- produce. © 1 thought you were 4 reporter.” After her maid had let her sniff the smelling-salts for some ten minutes she managed to make the man understand that she had eighteen dollars’ worth of jewelry, and that her cos- tumes belonged to the owners of the show, and that her other property was in S| ay ‘ early,” not ‘olly.* IF WOMEN WERE ANGELS. F WOMEN were angels (and To think they are now) what a tempest th 1 profess be *s pinions ty dress . dl never two could agree t Ofer how it were nicest How dean should be pr A seven-gored skirt and a simple shirt-waist They'd want, of a corsage that's must décolleté 5 So they'd rip out, tack, gather, gore, rutile and baste, Awd then stitch on the feathers in some other way, NOTHING LEFT FOR HIM. ambler was cursing his luck he 1, © You always lose when you have to com- pete with the wom His trusty pal w: «The women ? visibly jarred by the remark. he queried in amazement. have the women got to do with it?” His pat's dumbness riled him excessively. “Do with it?" he shrieked. “And bazars and fairs in full blast everywhere 2” What in the subway WHAT HURT THE MOST “Was the operation painful, deacon? ol-darus doctor charged me nineteen dollars an’ thirty cents fer it.” comicbooks.com