Judge — December 24, 1904 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

MERRY CHRISTMAS. “Did Chimmie git many presents fer Christmas?” “Did he? Sure! Why, he don't hardly know which ter smash first.” THE CARDS ARE OUT. S6LTERE is our family album,” said the fair young thing.“ Mr. Sezzit was here last night, and when I showed it to him he made fun of it—said an antiquated idea and all that sort of thing. “Well,” responded Mr. Wyse guard- edly, “lots of people think the albums are old-fashioned and all that sort of thing ; but as for me, I will say that there are features I greatly admire in this one.” - And what are the features 2” “ They are yours,” he explained, open- ing to the page which displayed her photo- graph. GOOD CHEER. ET the “turk” be nice and tender, hungry feelings to assuage, Let the pie not be a stratum of the Neolithic age; Let the applejack inspiring of its own enchant- ment tell, And, never fear, ‘mid all this cheer we'll spend this Christmas well. THE BRUTAL HUSBAND. +4] OOK at my jacket,” says the gentle wife. “It is two years behind the style; and my opera-cloak is so old that I am ashamed to be seen in it. In fact, I haven't a thing in that line that I can wear. I should think you would sympathize with me a What do you think THE oysters were talking things over while awaiting their de- livery. A lean one was jealous of a big fat one near him. “Well,” he remarked sarcastically, «I suppose you'll soon i TTT LUI PROOF. tickle somebody's palate 2” “ Not on your life !" returned the other, «I'm engaged for the season at a popular-priced restaurant.” VALE TOAST TO 1904. G00? ald year of nineteen-four! Every one had goods in store— Wheat galore, a dollar up, Lots to eat and lots to sup. None abroad is mad at us; Naught at home to cause a fuss— Just that ‘lection in the fall, Sort of landslide—that was all. May the year ahead give more Of the brand of nineteen-four! », 4. NO DANGER. Doctor—" Madam, you needn't dread the disease. There is only about one chance in a hundred ‘that you will get it.” Mrs. Hichurch (relieved) — “H'm! Something on the order of a church-fair chance, eh?” MOURNFUL THOUGHT. ‘OW oft on Christmas morning, little.” Mr. Urracainst—"'I hear they have passed a law in lowa that no The brutal husband merely degenerate shall be allowed to many." a a 1 . Mrs. Urracainst—'" But what e test of degeneracy ?”* snenmay |] don Leare a: wrap: Mr. Urracainst—" Oh, wanting to get married, | suppose.” Our joyous greetings mocking. We find a ten-cent present In a silk ten-dollar stocking. Gtaprs (sobbing)—'* Oh, my poor Evangeline! teott ‘The accident has made you look like our cook, and now I've got to change your name to Bridget. Boo-hoo-hoo!"" Graprs (to° dolf)—"'Sit there, Dolly. I'm going to change your name to Evangeline, ‘cos you are so pretty,” THE WAX DOLL'S CHRISTMAS WATERLOO. comicbooks.com