Judge, 1904-12-03 · page 5 of 16
Judge — December 3, 1904 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a 1915-era satirical magazine page containing humor pieces reflecting WWI anxieties and period social commentary. **Main cartoons:** The four-panel "Rube, His Whiskers, the Lighter, and the Fire-Extinguisher" depicts slapstick chaos—a man's magic tricks with these items gone spectacularly wrong, ending in explosion. This is purely comedic visual humor, typical of early-20th-century illustrated gags. **Text pieces** include: - "Retrospect": A poet lamenting lost youth and artistic dreams, now reduced to commuting from New Jersey—satirizing the mundane reality crushing artistic ambition - "Only Russian Victory": Dark WWI satire. An admiral awards a veteran for discovering the British fishing fleet (the war's only Russian "victory"?), mocking Russia's military failures - Various short jokes playing on ethnic accents (Yiddish/German dialects), period stereotypes, and domestic situations **Overall tone:** The page reflects wartime disillusionment, class anxiety, and casual ethnic humor characteristic of 1910s American satire—points now dated or offensive to modern readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A RETROSPECT. WHEN I was one-and.twenty How bright the whole world shone! The phrase, “Festina lente,”” Graced not my lexicon. "Twas then the muse I'd lasso— My captive could not stray— And with the soul of Tasso Send forth my roundelay. Alas! those visions rosy No longer glad my view, For now I'm dull and prosy And bald at forty-two. A wife, six kids—acuter The pang grows every day ; For I'm a poor commuter From Hackensack, N. J. RUGENR GEARY. JUST LIKE A WOMAN. Employer —" Where is that bit of paper with the com- bination of the safe on it? I told you to put it away very carefully, you know, and I can’t open the safe without it.” New secretary—" Vocked it in the safe, sir.” NO WONDER. Jaspar —"1 hear there has been a big washout on the P. D. Q. railr Jumpuppe—* Some of the water has leaked out of the stock, I suppose.” A VEXATIOUS CHAIN. First sateswan—"'So it vas a gombination ohf annoyances dot's making der boss holler?" Seconp satesuan—' Yaw. He losd der firsd gustomer; den an asbestos drum- mer called, den der fire-examiner called to inspecd der building, und'den a peddler tried to sell him a box of safety-matches. Ach! dot vas der lasd shtraw."” CAUSE AND CURE, HERE was a man in our town Who wasn't very wise. He tried to read about the war, And ruined both his eyes. For all the words were very queer And tangled up like sin; So now he’s reading Chinese books To cure his eyes again. ONLY RUSSIAN VICTORY. HE admiral pinned the glit- tering order upon the griz- zled veteran's breast. “The emperor honors a chosen son,” he said huskily. The long lines of marines swam before his eyes. «I did nothing, excellency; nothing,” sobbed the old sailor, overcome by emotion as he sank to one knee. “You saved the honor of your country,” said the admiral . hoarsely. In discovering the British fishing-fleet "—he turn- ed away to hide his tears— “you gave us the only victory of the war.” HOW IT HAPPENED. Stella—"How did she lose her engagement-ring 2” Bella —" Washing her hands of Jack.” comicbooks.com