Judge — October 15, 1904 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE FIFTH LADY. A TRAGEDY IN ONE ACT, ONE SCENE, ONE CLIMAX AND ONE TABLEAU. (Suitable for church, school, or parlor entertainments) Dramatis persona—Mrs. Jones-Brown ; (The Fifth Lady drops her book to her Mrs. Jones-Green; Mrs. Jones-White ;| fact that she is listening.) Mrs. Jones-Black ; The Fifth Lady. (Scene—The piazza of a hotel for pleas-| mother ! ure-seekers. ings, potted palms, etc. porch chairs on floor. Practicable door in centre. To right of door are seated Mrs. Jones-Brown, Mrs. Jones-Green, Mrs. Jones-White, and Mrs. Jones-Black. Number of wide As curtain rises they are in lively, but| with me! confidential, chat. Mrs. Yones-Brown—I, alas, had no He made me wear his mother’s Polished floor, large awn-| cast-off bonnets ! | Mrs. Jones-Black—You poor dear! And did he try to make you trim your own | | bonnets when you objected to that? He did me. Mrs. Fones-White—Worse than that I happened to have the honor To left of door is The | (shrugs shoulders) of being the last Mrs. | Fifth Lady, seated in porch chair, osten-| Jones but one, and he said that | must sibly reading a novel.) wear the hats and dresses that you ladies Mrs. Fones-Brown—Isn't it perfectly|had left behind when you secured your strange that we should all meet here ? Mrs. Fones-Black—Isn't it, though ? Mrs. Fones-Green—So odd ! Mrs. Fones-White—And (with a sly Jaugh) all on our second wedding-tours, too. (All giggle.) Mrs. Fones-Black —Well, sisters —I1 suppose we all are, word, sisters, at least by marriage—well, sisters, I think that if your experience has been what mine was, we are each of us perfectly entitled to a second wedding- tour. Mrs. Fones-Green—l, too. Sisters by marriage! If you feel as I do, you would be willing to amend that to “sisters by suffering"! Mrs. Fones-Brown—Was he so cruel to you, too? Mrs. Fones-Green—Cruel? That is hardly the word! If there ever was an- other such a mercenary, heartless, abusive wretch as Pudford Munkton Jones, history has not recorded him! (The Fifth Lady peers keenly over the edge of her book and studies the faces of intended for my ears. the ladies who are talking.) Mrs. Fones-White—It was not only that he,was so cruel. I will acknowledge that once he did throw me down stairs, but he was so stingy that it was impossible to get along with him. During the six months that intervened between our mar- riage and divorce I had one new dress, and mother bought that. in one sense of the| tells of her. divorces ! Mrs. Fones-Black, Mrs. Fones-Green, and Mrs. Fones-Brown—The wretch ! Mrs. Fones-White—But it is my under- standing that he is about to receive his just deserts. He has married the divorced wife of my present husband. Poor dar- ling! I wish you could hear the tales he She must be a spitfire ! Mrs. Fones-Brown—Pardon me, but was the former Mrs. Black a Mrs. Green before she married him? Mrs. Fones- White—Or a Mrs, Brown? Mrs. Fones-Black—Why, she was. 1 had forgotten that. Mrs. Fones-Green—Ves ; and she was also, before becoming Mrs. Jones, a Mrs. White. Mrs. Fones-White—Then she was- Mrs. Fones-Brown—Precisely ! She is bound to ail of us by sundered family ties. The Fifth Lady (rising suddenly, and interrupting their gurgling merriment) —Pardon me, ladies. Your information concerning Mr. Pudford Munkton Jones has been highly interesting, although un- Tcould not help overhearing it, even though I might have had some scruples against eavesdropping. As you are all on your bridal tours, you will be delighted to hear a word or two concerning your various husbands from one who is, or has been, in a position to know them. (Succession of gasps from the others.) Mr, Green, after the honey- moon is over, will come home drunk six CAUSE FOR CONGRATULATION. Otp GENTLEMAN: "m certainly not so bumming quite plainly '—Punch. deaf as people make out. I hear a little bee lap and makes no concealment of the| nights in the week, and not come home at allthe seventh. Mr. Brown will chew to- | bacco in the drawing-room and expectorate in the jardiniéres, Mr. Black will bring all his country relations to the house for long visits and insist on their being intro- duced to every caller. Mr. White will eat pie with a knife, have beer sent through | the front door in a pitcher, and kiss the cook, if she is under forty and isn’t a col- ored woman, If this isn't sufficient in- formation, I shall be only too happy to answer any inquiries you feel disposed to make, Mrs. Fones-Green—May Lask to whom we have the honor of listening ? The Fifth Lady—You may. 1am Mrs. Brown-Green-Black-White-Jones, and this is my fifth wedding-trip ! (Exeunt hurriedly Mesdames Fones- Brown, Fones-Green, Fones-Black, and Jones- White.) The Fifth Lady resumes her novel, humming softly the wedding-march from which melody is gradually “ Lohengrin, taken up by the orchestra (Slow curtaii ) Ww. D. NEsBr, Judge's Library A MAGAZINE OF FUN For OCTOBER A BOOK FULL OF LAUGHS REPLETE WITH SKETCHES BY AMERICA'S MOST CLEVER ARTISTS PRICE, For S: m 10 CENTS y all r jowsdealers, or ipt of price JUDGE COMPANY 225 Fourth Avenue, New York MADAME DU BARRY. Memolrs and Confessions of ‘One of the Most intereeung ‘Women Who Ever Lived (Complete in ¢ Volumes) DUKE DE RICHELIE Marshal of France. Alife covering 92 years of the ‘moat tarbulent and. fascl- the-Private Intrigues to mention. names, Of their private lives little would available, fone might su} the secrets however, st the real fac by intrigues with the women we heise Peas Ge det ay ouwaate [jsbua the avec artes France, these privat side lights on many dark pages in the history of ing reading. Few will be satisfied with a sin ‘at the Court of France. been sumptuous) ted dieute a aedo last at less thi first served, volumes bot there will be no deviation from the ‘THE pablic carcers of these belong to histor: ‘alee has also written an introduction to each memoir that enables you to see, and know the w ‘and more clearly understand the memoir. It is characteristic of these memoirs and confessions that their very frankness parges them of offense. This back-stairs gossip and these unreserved confessions throw time. ‘THE twenty’ volumes of courtiers and favorites of Royalty are fascinal le memoirs and confessions of Madame Du Barry, for example, and no one can understand the causes and effects of the French Revolution who is unacquainted with the inner side of the life AB these books are not intended for general circulation they have ‘on an ive very white paper with beautifal insert ‘By hand in rich Turkey morocco, The set is sold Ly subscrip- IVE sets have been bound in American morocco instead of the imported. These 25 sets are the same in all other respects, ‘except the binding, as the books at $10 a volume, but will be sold while they ‘half that price~monthly payments if preferred—frst come, in the imported morocco. A booklet fully describing the ‘edition will be sent {ree of cost if you mail the inquiry coupon at once. EMPRESS JUduell Private life of the American- born Empress Wo Lived ‘During the Moat tnterest- Ihe Tinie in French FB sosern rovene. the Nastlle. © The Secret State and Political Mancuvres as Well as of the French Court. READ THE LAST PARAGRAPH ABOUT 26 SPECIAL SETS. HE Court of France, from Henry of Navarre to Nay interesting personages, both great and frivolous, Louis XIV., XV- and XV Madame Du Barry, Josephine, Marie Antoinette, Madame Pompadour and all the others too well leon, was crowded with Richeliea, Talleyrand, and are as familiar as their ‘authentically known if only the public records were "The Bastile opened s0 easily and closed so tightly on anyone that fell into royal disfavor that Tew would be willing to take the chances Of penning personal memoirs that laid bare the most scandalous and profligate regime that has ever held sway. The very danger of i uulated some of the chief charactrs—some of the greatest courtiers and favorites—to tell ‘about their own lives and some of their fellows with a frankness and abandon that has never been matched. Some of these memoirs were hidden securely till long had died—others were confiscated by the police and burned by the common much on account of therr sensational nature as because of their exposure of state plots, secret double dealing, and corrupt designs. There never was another period the World's history when afairs of State were 30, managed and influenced by Royal favor 4 Da Barry high dignitaries of State and Church vied in furthering thete public policies and secret designs ho for the moment held the King's fancy. « CHERCHEZ-LA-FEMME” (find the woman) was the key to the under~ standing relations between governments, rise and fall of ministers of state, Feligious persecutions, ‘yes, the very making and undoing Of the monarch who seemed to be the direct power. “Alter me the deluge,” said Madame Pompadour, whose mad caprices set in motion forces that culminated in the terri- ble Revelation and the lows ofboth throne and ie by the luckleaa grandson of her royal lover.“ After- the time. jee, Librarian at the National Library of ind secret memoirs have been gathered, translated and illustrated from the gychives of the Bioheque of the Nationale, into which 3 after their authors ingman in Paris, not $0 ly of the fair sex. In the boudoir of original manuscripts have found their Ww: reading of the four volumes containing the MERRILL & BAKER 11 E. Heth St, NEW YORK. Please send me: lars—adver- Usement in JuDcK, October 15. rice for the