Judge, 1904-08-13 · page 4 of 16
Judge — August 13, 1904 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several humorous sketches and poems typical of early 20th-century satirical humor. **"At Larchmont"** depicts a domestic scene where a husband reassures his worried wife about rats on their boat—claiming his "boat is a cat-boat" (a play on words). **"Judge's Favorites"** features a portrait labeled "Lilian Maguire in 'Isle of Spice'" with accompanying verse praising an actress's beauty and grace. **"The Remedy"** and **"Why He Was Glad"** are brief joke-caption illustrations about folk remedies and rural humor, featuring stock characters common to period humor. **"Politics"** offers cynical commentary on political discourse, suggesting critics talk too much and politicians talk too little. The page reflects Judge magazine's typical mix of social satire, domestic humor, and entertainment industry commentary from the early 1900s.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
COMRADES, E HAVE pleasant talks, do my parrot and I, And this is the way that we make the time fy ; Although as we talk any time of the day, We know not a ward of the things that we say. And what do you think is the reason of this? You never could guess in a lifetime, I wis. ‘The parrot in Spanish e’er jabbers a streak, And onty in English I think I can speak. And while I go rattling in English along ‘The parrot is chanting a Spanish love-song ; And still we are happy and gay as we t Together to hang like the hook and the eye. And now we both wonder how long it will be Ere I can speak Spanish like lightning and he Can rattle in English some sente cheer, Like ++ How’s your grandmother?” or + Give me a beer!” And that’s why we're happy as over the waves ‘The seaweed and rocks and the big coral caves We scoot right along, like the knife and the fork, From Kingston, Jamaica, to Brooklyn, New York. AT LARCHMONT, She (shuddering) —" Oh, George ! I just read that all vessels have rats on them. Is that so?" He (reassuringly)—* Well, you needn't worry, dear. My boat is a cat-boat.” JUDGE'S FAVORITES. LILAM MAGUIRE IN ‘ISLE OP SPICE."” The rose that dances in the breeze, Reflected in the stream, Reminds us, with its witcheries, Of you, oh, dancing dream! For while you dance with joy apace Upon the stage, your art, Your beauty and your matchless grace Bloom in the public heart. FOR EXAMPLE. 5 FOR me," stated the petulant person, “1 can see no difference between half a loaf and no bread.” “But there is a difference,” replied the prac- tical one.“ Wouldn't you prefer a whole dough- nut to a doughnut hole 2” POLITIGS. TH road of politics is rough ; THE REMEDY. The critics have a stinging touch— * Phat's Kelly takin’ fer his cold ?”" They say one man talks not enough Pat—"* Nothing. He's shwore off.”* And that another talks too much. WHY HE WAS GLAD. “Yes,” sald Farmer Medders as he took a dose of ‘‘ malaria bitters,"" nursed his rheumatic leg, and rubbed camphor on his mosquito-bites: “yes, I'm allers glad ter see th’ summer boarders come. “And why?” asked Miss Ribbonkounter. “ Waral,"” he responded wearlly, ‘' misery loves company, ye know,”* comicbooks.com