Judge, 1904-05-28 · page 14 of 16
Judge — May 28, 1904 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily composed of period **advertisements** rather than political cartoons. The notable satirical content is **"A Campaign Programme,"** a poem from the *Washington Star* that mocks American electoral politics. It depicts "Uncle Jim," a mediocre political candidate chosen not for intelligence, education, or wealth, but solely for his ability to shake hands and project false charm. He avoids substantive speeches ("an' he don't say another word, / But keeps a-shakin' hands"). The satire criticizes how campaigns rely on glad-handing and empty charisma rather than merit or policy. The page also contains period **advertisements** for bicycles (Pope bicycles), office supplies, pharmaceuticals (Buffalo Lithia Water, a dubious cure-all for various ailments), champagne, and motorboats. The poem likely resonates with modern readers as a critique of **superficial politics and personality-driven candidates over substance**—a concern that remains relevant across eras.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
INNOVATIONS TWO-SPEED GEAR AND NEW COASTER BRAKE Greatest Improvements since the coming of the Chainless POPE QUALITY IN EVERY WHEEL POPE MPG. CO, RASTEAN DEFT.) HARTYORD, CONN. “Cotumbia” “Cleveland” Tribune* Crawford” WESTERN DEFT., CHICAGO, ILL. {Rambler * “Monarch” ‘Crescent* “Imperial” Catalogues free at 0 ne Catalogue maled on acelpt of a two-ceet stamp SANPLE oRDE: yoroughly test the quality of the goods. This For fall particulars and prompt attention, address, COOK, care ot THE CREAT AMERICAN th 0, You will get more prom; by mentioning Juvce when answering advertisements. |has a spicing of love that will cause the A CAMPAIGN PROGRAMME. My Uncle Jim’s a candidate ; They chose him from the lot. He says they will elect him To the office, like as not. It ain’t his wondrous learnin’ Nor his talent that commands. He hasn't got much money, But he’s great at shakin’ hands. There's somethin’ awe-inspirin’ {n the way he clears his throat Anil stands with one hand stuck inside His new Prince Albert coat. It's finer than the music of A dozen big brass bands When he says ** How-dy-do 2” To worl akin’ hands. an’ goes. He ain't a-makin’ lengthy talks, Like he made in the past ; I honestly believe he’s got The right idea at last. He smiles with patronizing pride, His bosom broad expands, An’ he don’t say another word, But keeps a-shakin’ hands. —Washington Star. We have received from the Bobbs-Mer- rill Company, Indianapolis, «The Cost,” by David Graham Phillips. This is by far Mr. Phillips's best triumph in the field of fiction, as well as one that should give him a high place among living novelists. It deals with business and politics, and average woman to open it at the last page. «That man,” said Bleacher, indicating the home player who was coaching vocif- erously, “is the new infielder they ‘ve | signed, but he'll never do for second bas + For goodness’ sake !” exclaimed Dub- | y, who was witnessing his first game, is he supposed to be singing ?"—PAila- delphia Press. Mother— What seems to be the trou- ble 2" Mrs, Neuwed—“\1—1 always heard Charles was fond of the turf, but I simply can't make him touch a lawn-mower."— New York Sun. BOR 5O YEARS THE STANDARD GERVED EVERYWHERE ene Lianor table cured in 20 reds OPIUM: OR. 3. i serueks £035 DED & SONS |PAPER’ w,WAREHOUSE New. ranch Wareh PAPER MAGE TO ORDER Ball-Pointed Pens —= =a jeBALL-POINTE D..9) S2if Buy an assorted sample bor of 24 pens for to suit your hand. . BAINBRIDGE 4 Co., Suitable for (H. HEWITT’S PATENT). every position; glide over and choose a pen Having found ene, stick to tt 00 Witiiam Sracer, New York ar any Stationery Store. Our 64-pa cheapest Heals ballt. today. Address RACINE BOAT MFO. CO., og «ives the truth in detail about the best and Ngencies i all principal etic. Write (Box J), MUSKEGON, MICH. “Especially the BUFFALOLITHIA WATER vied” For Bright’s Disease, Albuminuria, Renal Cal- culi, Gout, Rheumatism and All Diseases Dependent Upon a Uric Acid Diathesis. Samuel O. L. Potter, A. M., M. D., M. R. C. P., London, Professor of the Principles and Practice of Medicine and Clinical Medicine in the’ College Phy- sicians and Surgcons of San Francisco, Cal., ia his" Hand-Book of Materia Medica, Pharmacy and Thsrapeutics,’ "in thecitation of remedicsunder the head of *Chronic ght's Disease,” says: “Min- of Virginia, eral waters, ggpecially the BUFFALO LITHIA WATER has many advocates.”” under 66 is highly ree- “Albuminuria,” he says: ¢ BUEFALO LITHIA WATER cumendea” George Halsted Bo; M. D., of Paris, Doctor of Medicine, of the Facuily of Paris, in the New. sion Mo Medical’ Journal, August 22, 1896, says? “There is no remedy as absolutely specific ici all forms of Albuminuria and Bright's Disease, witether pring No. 2. acute or chronic, a: BUEFALO LITHIA WATER sccompanieaty a milk diet. In all cases of pregnancy, where albumin is found in the urineaslate as the last week before confinement, if this water anda milk diet are prescribed, the albumin disappears rapidly from the urine and the patient has a positive guar antee against puerperal coovelsions”” T. Griswold Comstock, A. M., M. D., of St. Louis, Alo., says: “I have often pree in Gouty and Rheumatic condi- scribed tions and in Renal Calculi, ac- companied by Renal Colic, and always with the most satisfactory results. In Renal Calcull, where there is an excess of Uric Acid, it is especially efficacious."” Medical testimony which defies all imputation or question mailed to any address. is for sale by druggists BUEFALO LITHIA WATER 13 grocers gencraly. Hotel opens June 15th. PROPRIETOR BUFFALO LITHIA SPRINGS, VIRGINIA. RICHFIELD SPRINGS, N. Y.~ For your summer outing. Situated in the Otsego Hills. where the altitude IRIMEVEMTIE]| '5 high. the air cool and bracing and the outdoor life delightful. For those | CATERER | cullering from gout. rheumatism and nervous diseases the sulphur baths and springs are among the most efficacious in the world. A beautifully Miustrated book of 128 pages describing this and other resorts along the Lackawanna Railroad and containing a fascinating love story entitled **A Chance Courtship,” sent for 10 cents in stamps. The accompanying picture 1s only one of the many beautiful illustra tlons. It is a book you will enjoy having. Write for it to-day to T. W. LEE, General Passenger Agent LacKawanna Railroad, New York City comicbooks.com