Judge, 1904-04-02 · page 6 of 16
Judge — April 2, 1904 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains early 20th-century humor targeting domestic life and gender relations. **"A Musical Confession"** depicts a mediocre violinist who practices obsessively, imagining himself a genius—satirizing amateur musicians and delusional aspiration. **"Estimating Her"** plays on the phrase "worth your weight in gold." A woman interprets her lover's compliment as criticism of her expense, then he recovers with a sentimental quote. The satire mocks both romantic clichés and women's financial anxiety about fashion. **"Quid Pro Quo"** presents marital bickering: a husband objects to his wife buying another expensive hat; she retorts that he spent money once too. It satirizes domestic arguments about spending and hypocrisy. **"Because"** shows cyclical family poverty—the father is "dead broke like father used to break"—suggesting generational failure. **"Some Hints"** and other pieces humorously advise readers on morality, often targeting wives' Easter hat expenses. The recurring Easter hat theme suggests this was published near Easter, with women's fashion consumption being a common satirical target. The overall tone reflects period anxieties about marriage, spending, and gender roles.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A MUSICAL CONFESSION. PLAY on the fiddle from morning till night, To gather the touch that is airy and light ; I play to the daisies that bob to and fro ‘And seem to be dancing with rapture aglow. I play, and the pussy-cats on the back fence All caper about with a Joy that's intense ; And spotted old Carlo, quite lost in his mirth, Sits up and barks gayly for all he is worth. Good friends, let me tell you that this is the way I practice all’ night and I practice all day ; And when I can rattle the ragtime so sweet That quick ‘twill get into the wayfarer’s feet T'll go for a job on the Rockaway boat And saw the four strings with my And hear the folks shout, ** He’s ag Ye gods! and he hasn't chrysanthemum jair.” ESTIMATING HER. Ss YOU are worth your weight in gold,” declares the fond lover when he sees the fair one in her Easter finery. + Do you mean that I am so extravagant in attire that my hat and gown bring my valua- tion up so high 2" she smiled. “No, no!" he assures her.“ You are worth your weight in gold.” “But you do not know how heavy I am.” : . ++ But love will find a weigh,’ he quotes ; and she vows he is the grandest man that ever lived. WHAT'S IN A NAME? Morcenstern—"* Good-evening, Rosenstein. | see you've got your new clothing-factory started— the Rebecca Suit Company, you call it. Why did you name it after a woman?” Rosenstein—" For luck. It's the name of am old flame of mine. QUID PRO QUO. 66 ANOTHER fitty-dollar hat this spring ?” asks the irate husband. “Why, you got one last year and only wore it once.” “ What if I did ?” asks the argumentative wife. “ You only spent the fifty dollars once last spring, didn’t you 2” BECAUSE. A “CLENCHED” HAND-OUT. ECAUSE his little wife cannot Trampinc THorLey— Did yer git de hand-out ye expected uv de lady 2” Tech aed tok, Miry Smoucert (growling)—" Naw! | got a hand-out | didn't expect, consistin’ uv Each spring he never fails to go bones an’ knuckles. Blamed if it wuzn't almost a knock-out.” Dead broke like father used to break, SOME HINTS. IF YOU would twang a golden harp Beyond this mortal sphere, Oh, practice not on the corset te ee. ; cee iy i] } j While still you stay down here. eee : INEZ Wahi If you would walk the golden streets Where blissful prospects please, Strew not in gay and festive Curves Banana-peel on these. If you would wear a halo there, Your happy soul to cheer, Don't kick about the Easter hat Your wife will get this year. MCLANDBURGH WILSON. MADE HER CRY. Mrs. Crawford —" This lovely Easter hat cost me only sixty-five dollars. Don’t you think I look pretty in it?” Craw, 27d—" Vl bet that ninety-eight-cent lamp-shade you bought the other day would be just as becoming you.” ASSISTING BABY'’S EDUCATION. Jounmie—" Well, if the baby learns any new words mamma can’t blame it on me."” comicbooks.com