Judge, 1904-03-19 · page 3 of 16
Judge — March 19, 1904 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated humorous sketches typical of Judge magazine's satirical format: **"In the Line of Progress"** depicts a steamship captain arguing that gambling should be allowed on ships, claiming it's natural and inevitable—satirizing technological progress being used to justify morally questionable practices. **"Viewpoints"** shows a domestic misunderstanding about Wagner music versus a piano tuner. **"Canajohharie"** features Uncle Jeremiah making a joke about hotel edicts and flirting. **"Fortune-Telling"** satirizes romantic couples consulting fortune-tellers, with the punchline about holding hands settling their future together. **"Which Got Licked?"** is a schoolroom joke about a student making faces at the teacher from behind geography books. The page is primarily humor-focused rather than politically charged, reflecting Judge's blend of domestic comedy, social observation, and light satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
IN THE LINE OF PROGRESS. ERTAINLY,” said the steamship man; “ we do all we can to stop gambling on our steamers.” “But is it wise?" asked his friend.“ Why in- terfere with the natural course of things? You know that fools and their money are soon parted, so why try to keep together what were evidently destined to be put asunder? Why not, on the contrary, pop- pularize your line by giving the gamblers every facility in your power? Why, with the advent of wireless telegraphy I should think you'd soon be able to get news direct from the race-tracks and run pool-rooms on your boats, to the delight of the sport- ing fraternity and the general public, who would thereby be enabled to take their dope-books to E rope and drop their money at every stage of the way over. Somebody will do it sooner or later, and you might just as well have the money as anybody.” VIEWPOINTS. Mrs. Cobwigger— Didn't you hear our daughter playing the selec- tion from Wagner this mornin, Cobwigger—“ Is that what it was? I thought it was the man come to tune the piano.” DONT BLOW OUT THE GAS. || Hill > | —= aA AY » i —~ ‘ibe OMINOUS. q Nan Hii z Crotty—"' So you told your father I loved you? What did he say ?"° Fh ¥ 3 i H of Erner—" Nothing; simply picked up a pair of dumb-bells and went ; % i ‘ iii3 to practicing.”* q 2 >) FORTUNE-TELLING, ‘ +4S0 YOU think you could read my future if I would let you hold 4 . my hand 2" asks the maiden. — “Well, don’t you think it shows more consideration for you FROM CANAJOHARIE. than to go out and figure on the stars? he asked sown f Uincté Jesiensian—* Homeph! | wonder Hf thess hotel eodytea shtnk 1s gata’ Ten minutes later he was holding her hand and his own future ter leave it flarin’ all night? H-m-ph! Pouf!"" had been settled. WHICH GOT LICKED? Boy—** Teacher, Bill Jones is makin’ faces at you from behind his geography.” ‘Teacher—"' How do you know he is?"* Bor—" Why, how kin a feller help it when he's behind his geography ?”* comicbooks.com