Judge, 1904-01-23 · page 7 of 18
Judge — January 23, 1904 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several disconnected satirical vignettes typical of early 20th-century American humor magazines: **"To Get It Right"**: Mocks pretentious horse-trading logic—asking a man his horse's worth when he won't sell reveals the absurdity of pricing valuables. **"An Instantaneous Hit"**: Ridicules vaudeville acts, suggesting sleigh-bells are only popular when *not* used—satirizing low-quality entertainment and audience taste. **"Miserable Country"**: A South American tourist challenges American exceptionalism, implying U.S. government interference is actually undesirable. **"Filled All Requirements"**: Satirizes capitalism and entrepreneurship—a poor inventor's artificial egg succeeds not through innovation but by mimicking inferior mass-produced eggs. The capitalist profits by selling imitation rather than genuine improvement. **"A Practical Connoisseur"**: Mocks the newly wealthy ("Parvenue") who fake sophistication by buying antiques "made to order"—new items disguised as antiques. The bottom cartoon appears to show a comedic character with a sled contraption.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
To eleeeed % N TO GET IT RIGHT. “What is your horse worth?" don’t want to sell him.” “Exactly. That's why | ask you how much he is worth.”* AN INSTANTANEOUS HIT. 66VES," said the vaudeville performer, | use a set of sleigh-bells in my act.” + Won't do,” snapped the manager. any sleigh-bell acts.” “Too old a turn, Can't use “ But the way I use them makes the greatest hit ever seen.” “ How do you play ‘em ?" “That's where the hit comes in, I have them on the stage all the time, but [I never touch them at all,and the audience goes wild. Many a time I've had four or five encores, the people were so glad not to hear the sleigh-bells jingled.” MISERABLE COUNTRY. S4YOU fellows need never worry about Uncle Sam interfering with your government,” says the Yankee tourist. “Indeed 2” asks the South American citizen incredulously.“ And FILLED ALL REQUIREMENTS. aaa | HAVE here,” said the poor inventor, ‘The purse-proud capitalist v “ Nope,” growled the capitali find a market for ‘em.” “But, sir,” pleaded the poor inventor, « by a secret process I have heen able to give these eggs the consistency and flavor of the popular cold-storage egg of commerce.” That afternoon the agreement was drawn up and the poor in- ventor went home with his little old ten millions in stock in his inside pocket. The trick is not to invent a substitute for what the public wants, but to get up an imitation of what the public is used to, artificial egg.” dd him away. ; “there’s nothing to it. Couldn't A PRACTICAL CONNOISSEUR. Mrs. Cobwigger—“ What a beautiful collection of antiques you have, my dear!" Mrs, Parvenue—It should be. My husband knows all about such things, and had them made to order.” A BRILLIANT IDEA. Pomp—" Haw, haw! Dis inwention ob mine am great fo’ ice-coastin’, an’— —it suttinly am suitable to mah anattimy when I slips up. comicbooks.com