Judge, 1903 · page 19 of 20
Judge — 1903 — page 19: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising** interspersed with brief jokes and humorous anecdotes typical of Judge magazine's satirical content. The advertisements promote products like Welsbach gas lights, Dr. Deimel underwear, Cortes cigars, Old Crow Rye whiskey, and Williams' Shaving Soap. The Williams' ad uses the social message "Be Fair to Your Face," encouraging readers to use quality soap. The scattered jokes reflect early-20th-century humor: - A quip about James Fenimore Cooper's outdated writing style - Wordplay about the Tower of Babel creating a "lovely dialect novel" - Domestic humor about marriages and penny-pinching wives - A perpetual motion machine inventor's ironic problem The page contains **no apparent political cartoons or caricatures** of named public figures. Instead, it features generic satirical vignettes mocking common social types (rural postmasters, nagging wives, inventors) typical of Judge's lighthearted approach to American life during this era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The WELSBAGH Nght d it stops complaint. he Shield of Q. ualityis Stamped on the genuine bumery ~ Cooper was writing his Leatherstocking tales. “T know they're old-fashioned,” he admitted sadly. “ They should have been football trousers !" Patiently he tried to counterbalance this by war-whoops almost as good as college yells.—New York Sun. mest) (usen Worth its weight in gold, though sold for less. For Sale by Leading Houses everywhere. “MADE AT Gores OGARS 100 ses8 ie ferry es The tower of Babel had just aes the confusion of tongues. “Great Scott !" cried the man at the bottom, “ what a perfectly lovely dialect novel !” Hastily taking it down in shorthand, he made notes for the success of the season. —New York Sun. | Miegende Blatter. Merchant —"Yes'm; one pound of nails. Six, eight, or ten penny ?” Sirs. Youngthing— Give me the ten- cent ones, please. I always get the best.” —Chicago News. Lady— Begging must Tramp—*Itis, lady. 1 time that I have’ to eat soup to-day.”"— The Sohmer Pianos are recommended to the | pabile for their power, purity, richness said the angry tailor, fou intend to beat me out of this All right,” chuckled the happy debtor. “If you're satisfied, 1 am."—Zultinore News. You can face the work of life with termination when you feel full of ¢ bott’s, the Original Angostura Ditters, create energy. new de- Friend —“ How is your motion machine getting along ? Haggard but enthusiastic inventor— | “It is perfected, all but one little detail, and [shall have that mastered in a few “perpetual- Friend— What is that detail, may 1 ask?” Inventor—" The machine won't quite start itself yet."—Chicago Tribune, DELICIOUS flavor, smooth- ness and purity characterize Old Crow €. Sold only in our registered bottles everywhere. H.B. KIRK &CO., Sole Bottlers, N.Y. Mrs. Hayfork (in country post-office) —" Anything for me?” Postmaster—\ don't sec nothin’ Airs. Hayfork— | was expectin’ a let- ter or post-card from Aunt Spriggs, tellin’ what ie she was comin ‘Rural postmaster (calling to his wife) —Did you see a post-card from Mrs. Hayfork’s Aunt Sallie ? His wife—“Yes; she's comin’ on Thursday."—Petoskey (Mich.) Lyre. Fen Sacaps a= ¢s ee Saba. Ioe Oaece ‘ONE DROP WORKs Woxprns seasoning for 80 BE FAIR TO and your face will be fair. you put on your face, than Ther THE J. B. WILLIAMS co., oxpox WILLIAMS *s ‘SHAVING SOAP YOUR FACE Can you afford to be less careful about the soap about the food you eat ? Think what one mistake may cost you. only one safe way. When shaved by barbers Old Reliable Williams’ Shaving Soap; substitute from dealers, if you shave yourself. Sold in the form of Shaving Sticks, Shaving Tablets, ete throughout the world. insist that they use the accept no Glastonbury, Conn,, U. S. A #adipus had just solved the riddle of the sphinx. “The way to make her talk,” he ex- plained, “is to get her to the opera.” Triumphant in his discovery, he was, tation.—New York Sun. * Aren't there some jealousies in your progressive-euchre club ?” “No, indeed,” answered young Mrs. Torkins. When we buy prizes we are always careful to select things that no one really wants, so that the winner will not be an object of envy."— Washington Star. Mrs. Henpeck—Celebrate our cen- tenial wedding anniversary? What do you mean, sir? Don't you know we haven't been married a hundred years 2” Henpeck — Well—er—it. seems that long, anyhow."— Chicago News. Friend—“ Now that you have made millions, what will you do? Old Bullion — Vshall retire and amuse myself telling people what a burden wealth is and how happy I was when I was poor."—Vew York Weekly. The trees now fling their gold to earth; Perhaps they've reached the pitch Where they are anxious to avoid The crime of dying rich. —New York Sun. however, at a loss for means of transpor-| “ Terence, what is the doctor's diagnosis of your case ?" “He hasn't told me yit, but I'm bettin® itll be iv'ry cint av tin dollars."— Chicago Tribune. “Did [ understand you to say that you always eat a breakfast food in the morn- ing 2" asked the man from Missouri. * Sure,” replied the man from Massachu- sets,“ Pie."— Cincinnati Times-Star. “ But,” said the heiress, how am I to know that you are not marrying me for my money ?” * Itis an even break,” replied the young man who was addicted to the clove habit. “How am I to know that you are not mar- rying me to reform me ?"—Chicago News. PARLOR LAMP, Deautifully decorated, with an order for 20 tbat ‘of New Crop. 020 Ibs, Baking Powder, 4c. a 1b., or an aston comicbooks.com