Judge, 1903-10-10 · page 3 of 16
Judge — October 10, 1903 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical scenes with accompanying dialogue: **Upper image**: Depicts what appears to be a dramatic medical or theatrical scene with multiple figures in period dress, illustrating a story about surgeons debating whether to operate on a sick man. **Lower image** (titled "Needed the Dough"): Shows two men in conversation. The caption identifies "Old Jones" asking "Do you play cards for money?" and his "Daughter's Lover" responding about being "busted." The joke appears to satirize a young suitor's financial desperation—he's willing to gamble to solve money problems, likely to impress his girlfriend's father. The surrounding text columns contain unrelated satirical commentary on various social topics, including remarks about marriage and professional athletics. Without clearer date markers or specific historical references visible, the exact political context remains uncertain, though the tone reflects typical Gilded Age social satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
MUST GET THAT. HE surgeons stand about the couch where lies the sick man. « There is consider- able change in him,” says the most eminent of the surgeons. We must operate on him imme- diately.” “But why need we operate?” asks the youngest of the surgeons —a mere tyro, who cher- ishes the delusion that nature gets’along pretty well on her own hook, and thinks he can be happy if he only gets to write a few prescriptions every day. The other surgeons turn upon him with scorn. “Why,” they echo; “why? Haven't you learned yet that’as long as there is any change in a man we must go after it?" Crushed, he hastens to obtain a chloroform cone, with the idea of demonstrating the fact that he is willing, even if slow of comprehension. A YOUNG WITNESS. ITTLE John was at- tending his first play. It was all real to him, and his eyes were as big as saucers. The villain had performed his time- honored part of shooting a defenseless man, and later, when confronted with the charge, he cried impressively, “I did not do it!” This was too much for little John. Jumping on his seat, he shouted, * Yes, you did, too, for I saw you!" WHY SHE WAS HAPPY. Ste—" Oh, she married a duke and has lived happy ever after."" “1 thought they had parted."* He Sue—"' Yes; that's why she {s happy.” “ Worse—infinitely worse ! sand dollars a week as demonstrator for a hair-tonic.” NEEDED THE DOUGH. Ou Jones—* Do you play cards for money ?”” Davanrer's Lover—*Y-yes, sir; but Ovp Jones—" Well, let have a game. ~T'm about busted." BUSINESS-LIKE. #4] DO not see what earthly attraction that little dried-up shrimp of a Figgeritt could have had for Mrs. Petishun.” The lady who makes this remark points toward the couple as she speaks. «There's noth- ing handsome about him,” she continues. I know that he has the reputation of being the most expert book-keeper and accountant in the country, but still I can’t see for the life of me what charm he had for her.” “Tunderstand,” says the friend, «that it was a marriage of conven- ience on both sides.” Yes?" “Yes. You see, she has been divorced seven times, and simply had to have some one to look after her alimony collec- tions.” A SORDID SOUL. 46]S Samson Huskiman going to coach your football team this sea- son 2” asks the visitor of the quarter-back. “Samson Huski- man? Don't repeat that name on the campus.” “ Why, is there any- thing wrong about "— “Wrong? Listen. Instead of playing with the boys this year, what do you suppose he is go- ing to do?" “Going into profes- sional athletics ?" He has accepted the offer of a thou- comicbooks.com