Judge, 1903-08-29 · page 10 of 17
Judge — August 29, 1903 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple short humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical format: **"A Professional Pointer"** jokes about bookkeeping—"putting down the seven and carrying the eight" (arithmetic operations) as the path to wealth and supporting a family. **"The Woman of It"** plays on a wife's misreading: she confuses news about yachtsman Lipton cutting sail area with American bargain sales, conflating maritime and shopping terminology. **"The Races"** makes a pun: the baseball pitcher is replaced by a cup, suggesting horse racing (where cups are trophies). **"Got An Idea"** satirizes a Russian visitor misunderstanding "surf bathing" as "serf bathing"—implying Russia's feudal labor system needs importing. **"Only Natural"** presents a racist joke where a Black man's dog is called a "rabbit-dog" because it bit someone carrying a rabbit's foot. **"Professional Knowledge"** puns on "Paregoric" (a medicinal tincture) being "good in squalls" (both medical and nautical contexts). **"Our Prehistoric Games"** suggests polo descends from prehistoric skull-playing, mocking the sport's upper-class Newport association.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A PROFESSIONAL POINTER. © RUN up the columns From daylight till dark, 1 fly as the squirrel “That climbs the shagbark. And when in a jiffy ‘That work 's done, elate I put down the seven And carry the eight. And that's how the shekels Of silver and gold To me in big barrels Are rapidly rolled To feed my six child And hat my one wife And keep me ‘The good things of life. touch with If you would be like me And learn, if you ever In fortune and looks, Would monkey with fate, Go right at the keeping To put down the seve Of somebody's books, And carry the eight. ‘THE WOMAN OF IT. HE. paper says,” observed the husband, who was read- ing the morning paper, "that Lipton will cut down his sail area.” “I supposed he would,” answered the wife, pouring the coffee. “ You supposed he would 2” “Why, yes. Tread on the women’s page of the paper last night that he thought the American bargain-sales were wonderful.” ‘THE RACES. TE, baseball field, deserted, Now tells us what is up, For we behold the pitcher Is ousted by the cup. GOT AN IDEA. 46 AH!" said the visiting Russian as the pleasure-yacht scudded near the shore and he saw the crowds of merry-makers sporting in the water. “What do you call that? “That,” said his host, “is one of our great American pastimes—surf bathing.” “Serf bathing? It I shall make a note of it.” something needed in my country. ONLY NATURAL. Mr. Jacxson— * Yo'r dog jest bit me.” “Well, why didn’t yo" hab a rabbit's foot in yo'r pocket?” T did." "Well, den yo" can't blame him. He's a rabbit-dog.” PROFESSIONAL KNOWLEDGE. ++ )R. WISE calls his new yacht « Paregoric,’" said the commodore. “Odd name. Why?” asked the captain. “Says it is so good in squalls,” answered the commodore. ———-S ee ~~ oe y OUR PREHISTORIC GAMES. The game of * skulls,"’ as played by our prehistoric parents, and supposed to be the original of polo, so popular at Newport to-day. comicbooks.com