Judge — August 8, 1903 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

FORE! The contents of FUDGE ave protected by copyright in both the United States and Great Britain. —— g Ax rue Parken BUILDING, FounTm AVENUE axD Nivereextm Stexxt, New Youre. Wastaxx Apvertisinc Ori UNITED STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. ‘One copy, one year, or sanumbers= = ee ‘One copy, six months, or 6 numbers - ‘One copy, for thirteen weeks. SUBSCRIPTIO: Evnornan sates-actwts—International News Company, Bream's building, Chancery Lane, F.C, Landes: Brentano's, Avene del! Opera, Paris; Saarbach's News Exchange, PUBLISHED WEEKLY 128 Marquette Building, Cricage, It, TO § TERMS BSCRIBERS : $3.00 350 Tnctuding the Cumisraas Juoce. . To all foreign countries in the postal union, $6.00 a year. Infringement of this copyright will be prompily and bigorously prosecuted. CONTRIBUTORS must inctose a stamped and self-addressed erfoelope with all manascripts, othefivise return of the Latter when found unavailaNe cannot be guaranteed. DRAWINGS and all contributions sent to the Art Department should have the sender's full name and address written plainly on each and every separate shetch. The accompanying joke or descriptive letterpress should in very instance be written upon tts indroidaal picture, and NOT upon a separate slip of paper. Inclosare of stamps to the full amount of postage ts also required, 19 tnsure safe and promet rete of material not accepted. RACTURED JULEP-STRAWS show how the wind that is raised by hard work is blown in. SUMMER-RESORT HUMOR is now on tap, and the trail of the sea-serpent is practically over it all, N INTERESTING EVENT on the baseball dia- mond would be a game between the presidential possibilities and impossibilities. E TRUE blue-grass Kentuckian, be he colonel or not, is probably of the opinion that the proof of the julep is in the drinking. 'HE LARGE four-hundred-pound bear now finds chunks of solid joy in the solitary huckleberry that is never too small to empurple his rosy vision and to gild his epicurean appreciation. . Tr IS THE CONSENSUS of opinion that the Reliance will slip over the water just fast enough to cause the cup to slip between the fingers whose mission, not to say function, it is to measure the drinks of Sir Thomas. TH Ti oe IE KAISER never tires of saying pleasant things to and of Uncle Sam; but while he sends his friendly messages across the sea he does not Tee NOS > cease in his ship-building activity, for he worships war-ships more than he does friendships by a large and blooming majority. To vary an ancient saying, he keeps his mouth wagging while he saws the wood of victory and self-preservation. At present he is attempting the difficult double- barreled job of making a steel plate that cannot be penetrated by any ball, and a ball that can penetrate any steel plate. And while he is engaged in this highly interesting work he finds time to punctuate his hammer-blows with words of praise and friendship for Uncle Sam which, it is to be hoped, are even sweeter and more sincere than they sound. 'HE WALKING DELEGATE has all seasons for his own. It makes little difference to him whether the walking is good or bad; he walks just the same. And the more he walks the fatter he waxes, for he grafts both ways. He has a smile for the employer and a smile for the employé. He is two-faced and false-faced. He is the friend of nobody but himself; and if he had his just deserts he would be cracking stone in the peniten- tiary and doing his walking to the light fantastic lockstep made and provided for the striped-suited contingent. No matter how harsh and hostile the criticisms heaped upon and against him may be, he still walks and has his being on the thoroughfare of industry and flourishes like a green bay-tree. That he is a menace to every element of decency that labor can boast is too well accepted a fact to require any elaboration or argument. Yet he is allowed to remain and practice his sweatless and nefarious art and to pros- per and wax fat. Like the serpent of old, he is the subtlest beast of the field, and his two-faced head should be bruised into pulp, to the end that the mechanic may prosper and have a reason for existence. A NOT SO BAD. Mrs. Ketty—'* Did yure husband come home sober?” Mrs. Rooney—* Comparatively so. He admitted thot he was dhrunk."” comicbooks.com