Judge, 1903-06-20 · page 11 of 16
Judge — June 20, 1903 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising**, not political satire. It's a typical early 20th-century Judge magazine page mixing short humorous anecdotes with commercial advertisements. The small jokes scattered throughout are mild workplace and domestic humor—a student deflecting a physics question, a lobbyist bribing a senator, a kid avoiding a math problem by talking about marbles games. These reflect common contemporary gripes: bureaucratic corruption, education, and childhood mischief. The dominant content is ads for **products marketed to gentlemen and households**: soaps (Packer's Tar, Williams'), pianos (Sohmer), cigars (Manuel Lopez, Egyptian Dieities), ale, champagne, ginseng, cuff links, and trains. The ads emphasize quality, tradition ("brewed 117 years"), and respectability—typical marketing appeals for Judge's middle-class male readership. There are **no identifiable political figures or events** on this page. The satire is generic and timeless rather than topical.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
+ is always at a loss, “1 suppose the earth “ How do you account for the rotation | of the earth on its axis?” asked the pro- fessor. Well,” asl answered the young man who | sei had to rotate on somethin; ton Star. Vashing- * Vari Major has made a fotau.c in the automobile busine: 1 didn't know he manufactured that cass of vehicle: + He doesn’t; he repairs them."—Cin- cinnati Commercial Tribune. of Charged with the aromatic fragrance of the strengthening and medicinal herbs of the topics, Dr. Siegert’s world-renowned Angos- tura Bitters is the most healthful tonic and appetizer. “Thope,” said the lobbyist, «that y will lend your support to this measur Lend 2" said the senator. ‘+ What's the matter? Ain't your people prepared to pay in advance ?"— Catholic Standard and Times. Citizen— Say, can't you give my son a job in the city hall 2" ‘Mayor—" What can he do?" Citizen—" Do! Why, if he could anything I would employ him mysel Chicago News. do Through the ins and outs of the years you'll find simple rule should mind: Be sure that you have a reliable soap Before you blow any bubbles of hope. —Atlanta Journal, Don’t despair. Ill health fies when Ab- bott's, the Original Angostura Bitters, are used. One be borne in Teacher— If Johnny Jones has twenty- one marbles and you have a third less, how many will you have 2" Kid—" That depends on what kind of game we play. Dey can’t beat me in er big ring."—New York Journal. Packer’s | Tar Soap is pure, mild, invigorating and antiseptic. It soothes while father and after Miss Moneyto won't it be funny to call you papa Lippincott’s Ma; wine you serve is Cook's Imperial Extra Dry Champagne. | keeping strong ?" cisco Wasp. queer fashion." houses that have hard-wood floors and have acquired the skating habit."—Chi- cago Record-Herald. artists for both concert and private use. has double good luck ; day loafing in the house.—Aéchison Globe. | He said he loved her and, when asked surance on his life in her favor. accordingly, as the policy was in the The connt (old enough to be a grand- n)—" I haf ked your mamma and she gif her con- nt; and now I—er—" Miss Moneyton—1 am so glad! But ine. You cannot set a first-class dinner unless the “How are you, old fellow? Are you only just managing to keep out my grave. « Lam sorry to hear that."—San Fran-| “ Why do these people walk in such a “They're not walking. They live in ‘The Sohmer Pian is the prime favorite for — When a farmer gets a needed rain he} he can spend the ht and Contentment ‘Long Life in every BOTTLE *EVANS’ ALE ‘The pursuit of happiness is a tread- mill race girioen it, Brewed for past 117 years by C,H, Evans & Sons, Hudson, N. Ys ‘There’s Del Heal some proof, produced a policy of in- Verdict PENN MUTUAL LIFE, 921-3-5 Chestnut St., Philadelphia. cleansing, and for more than a r quarter of a century has been The Standard For the Hair and Skin ‘The Packer Mfg. Co., 81-83 Fulton St., New York. Sohmer Building, Bt. HE “SOHMER” HEADS THE| LIST OF THE HIGHEST | GRADE PIANOS SOHMER PIANOS Only salesroom tn Greater ‘York. Sth Ave. cor 22% W¥ BARKER come CUFFS ARE THE BEST BUY THEM. Highest GradeHavanaCigars ||; ‘You will get more prompt attention and better service | yy mentioning JuDce when answering advertisements. Manuel Lopez @ Co., 9-11 Thames St. New York 35-37 Randolph St. - Chteago, 1. ye GINSENG =: free, telling < sgimees the Ginseng In gery a See jour money. F, B, MILLS, Bax 60, Rose Hull, N.Y. No better Turkish Cigarette can be made Egyptian Deities Cork Tips as well A western paper refuses to publish | culogies gratis, but adds, * We will pub- know you can’t say * ain't got nothin’ "? lish the simple announcement of the death | Boy: (with the dirty face)—" I know 1 of any of our friends with pleasure."—| kin. it ev'ry day o° my lite.”"—Chi- Ram's Horn, cago Tribune. Boy (with the curly hair)-—" Don't you ILLIAMS “sox Prize Puzzle How many of the 24 distinguished men shown here can you name? Toany one sending us the corpect name of any fat of there a-cent stamp to cover cost of mailing, we will forward. poste. feciiatot amen ad sho a sat wcfal and Wgeetous Ke fey-ring, letter opener, paper cutter an ticle that every mart and boy will ind many uses for every ay, Habdy forthe chaciter, the bicycle Tider, for opentog cigar box watch cases, for automatic air valves, et al ey! ‘hotier he Keys sccurely, divides the keys-easy to find the ooe wanted z WHAT IS SAID OP IT: * Wouldn't Take 50 Cents for I si bare recumbent nd Ee He very och, Ewe Thing | Mave Nn de jost Convenient Pocket Com; Address Dept. 27 THE J. B. WILLIAMS CO., Gl comicbooks.com