Judge — January 31, 1903 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TO A PRETTY GIRL. AT: PRETTY one, you know you're fair, And though you won't confess It openly, a hint shows through Your sweet unconsciousness. You say that none has called you fair, An And that you could not know ] sil fortab That you were beautiful unless l hs NX at Somebody told you so. i I cannot doubt a lady’s word — I would not be so bold ; But yet, if human tongues are still, Your mirror must have told. ~Th music Y sic cet lofty a DS, And if by some malicious grudge, Which envy might inspire, It may have told you otherwise, That mirror is a liar. MODERN JOURNALISM. ‘ELLAVE you covered all your afternoon assignments ?” inquired the city editor of the " yellow journal.” “Yes,” answered the new reporter, rolling up his sleeve and administering a hypodermic injection of elixir of life. ames wemrseneny Place % ‘ WILLIAM J. LASIFTON. A FIT SUBJECT. Facetious Freo—" Eddie, | jest heard de boys tellin’ erbout a famous doctor dat's goin’ round curin’ wry neck. Yer better lay low or he'll git holt uv yours.”” Tl “Yes, sir.” * You secured a smooth story on the sensations of playing golf minus a red waistcoat ?" “Yep.” “Well, here’s an order on the cashier for two dollars. Go out and hire some one to sandbag you, and. be sure to turn in by to-morrow a fierce story on how it feels, That'll be all to-day.” OPENING FOR AMERICAN ENTERPRISE. Weer eerecritr ie. First South American—“ What's this big poster about? It's pretty “Has that Insomnia medicine I prescribed had any effect yet?" well gotten up, but I don’t exactly understand it. It speaks of + great amuse- “Well, my foot was asleep this morning.” rent golconda’ and ‘stupendous aggregation’ and tking of tented amusement insti- tutions.’” Second South American —* Oh, that's a concern from tke United States that has been in our coun- try for some time. It travels from town to town, giv- ing insurrections each afternoon and evening. Quite a success financially, 1 understand.” * You . called the governor a liar, did you, and took down his reply in shorthand ?” “1 did.” You accom: panied the board of health through the sewer in the hunt for typhoid = germs?” «Yes, sir.” “And inter- viewed Actress Sweet Marie about her milk-baths and champagne break- fasts ?" “Yep.” “You took down verbatim Senator Guggen- heim's ‘hot-air got only a year.” spiel’ at the ly- Fair client— ceum 2" § “It might as well “1 did.” . f : have been twenty. By the time I get TOO BAD! Lawyer— “What are you kicking for? You “And also made an ascension out I will be for- with Professor WHY SHE SOURED ON HIM. Erwer—"'This | hot yhen a child. My father is holdi in hi Honaaran’as Setteiand then! Highty in his new jgStMthc Thi, 18 my photograph when a hl. My father i elding me in hs arms. He Res om NE ve "go. on the air-yacht ? a wo SS .55COUO“ CioLtr—" Aw, home from the civil war on a furlough at the time It was taken, | suppose ?”* stage.” comicbooks.com