Judge, 1903-01-17 · page 5 of 16
Judge — January 17, 1903 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct pieces from *Judge* magazine: **"Ballade of the Avenue"** (poem with illustration): A romantic poem lamenting class inequality. The speaker admires wealthy young women (Geraldine, Agnes, Marjorie) who ride in fancy carriages down the avenue, while he must walk. The satire targets the conspicuous display of wealth by the upper class and the speaker's own yearning for their lifestyle and romantic attention. **"Easily Rendered"** (dialogue joke): Two Irish-American characters (O'Tunder and Phleggum) debate whether French translates easily to Irish. O'Tunder confidently claims it does, then proves it by "translating" the French phrase *"pardonnez moi"* into Irish as *"Pardonnez Moike"*—essentially just replacing "moi" with an Irish name. The joke mocks Irish immigrants' linguistic pretensions and limited actual language skills. **"Positively Provoking"** (brief joke): A quip about a disappointing marriage—disappointing because friends predicted failure but the couple succeeded.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
BALLADE OF THE AVENUE. HIS is the hour when, out on the street, Now that the clocks the tower point three, Geraldine comes, lo: ing wondrow: sweet, Geraldine, Agnes, and dear Marjori All of them lovel some fleurade-lis. None of them ever has nce disobeyed cat Madam Fore tune, as you will agree— Ho! for the avenue car- riage parade! Never on foot come these maidens dis- creet, Though the day ‘s springlike, as you and I se You and I ride, when the winter rains beat, You and I ride (ina trolley, may- b in thei n cquipages, pardee (Not in poor carriages, tattered and 7 must walk —with stern Ho! for the aycnue carriage parade! Pity the people who wear out their feet, Fortunate maids, as you flutter by me. T would be happy had I but the seat Your proud driver has, dressed in y livery ! And yet I'm rejoiced as you hur- riedly fle Nodding to none save to one who's afraid 1 to hope fora slight courte Ho! for the avenue carriage par: ENVOY. Fortune, T pray you, from your treas ury 1 me enough that my debts may be paid, That, riding with my girl, I'M sing merrill “Hot for the avenue carriage pa- rade!" cyantes Haxsox Town EASILY RENDERED. SeTH! FRINCH language,” de- clared Mr. O'Tunder, * i like th’ Irish thot I hey no trouble at all, at all, tundysbtand it.” “ Nonsense,” commented Mr. Phleggum. “No nonsinse about it,” as- serted Mr. O'Tunder, “1 vinture t' sa-ay there ‘s no ixpriss Frinch thot may not aisily be ix- prissed in Irish, by any wan who is famil-yer wid th’ wo tongues.” “More nonsense!” was the reply of Mr. Phleggum. “For instance, how would you put * par- donnez moi" in Irish 2” “Wud ye shpell it fer me Mr. Phleggum did so. “Tis aisy,” declared Mr. O'Tunder. “In Irish th’ sintince wud be shpoken thus: * Pardon- nez Moike."" POSITIVELY PROVOKING. “ Her marriage was a great disappointment to her friends.”* “Indeed ?”* “Oh, yes. They all predicted it would turn out unhappily and it didn't.”” comicbooks.com