Judge, 1902-09-20 · page 7 of 18
Judge — September 20, 1902 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple short humorous pieces satirizing American society's wealth-obsession and changing social customs. **"A Money-Making Family"** mocks the Gettis family's relentless pursuit of wealth through increasingly absurd means—a good wheat crop, an oil-well-owning son-in-law, engagement to a sickly millionaire, and deliberately causing accidents (automobile collision, trolley-car collision) to collect insurance. The satire targets both the nouveau riche's desperation and insurance fraud as a get-rich-quick scheme. **Other pieces** joke about marital disappointments ("Times Changes"), women making their own clothes to save money while husbands eat in restaurants, and language barriers in international marriages. **"The Home Rush"** celebrates returning vacationers from New England coastal towns—poking fun at their pretentious foreign labels while affirming genuine local pride. The overall message: American society is increasingly mercenary, materialistic, and willing to abandon dignity for profit. The humor reflects turn-of-the-century anxieties about economic mobility and changing values.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A MONEY-MAKING FAMILY. —— HE Gettits are on the road to wealth,” says the sage of the grocery. “I understood they was doing right well,” ob- served the grocer. “Yes. They hada big wheat-crop, and their corn turned out twice as gout as they expected; the oldest daughter run away with a summer boarder that owns a oil-well in Texas; the younger daughter is en- gaged toa sickly millionaire; the old man was hit by an automobile and gets accident insurance and dam- ages from the chauffeur; and now they are going to move to the city, where the old lady will have a chance to collide with a trolley-car and make the company settle.” A GREAT SAVING. Mrs, Buster—« Mrs, Jaspar is making her own clothes now. ‘They ought to be rich soon.” Mrs, Redhead—“ Oh, { don’t know. Her hus- band is living in restaurants in the meantime.” ‘TIMES CHANGES. Madye— She used to say she could be completely happy in a wilderness with him.” Marjorie— And yet she has now gone out west to live in a wilderness in order to get a divorce THE HOME RUSH. from him.” HEY'RE coming back from where they went, And some of them without a cent. what did you catch this morn Froo nunrer—"' I don't know what it is, Marie, but its fur must be worth a good deal, as it's all ready made, clothes-buttons and all.”” Their trunks and traps are plastered o'er With labels from some foreign shore. But labels from New England's coast Are those which 1 enjoy the most. “+ From Scituate” upon one trunk, “+ From Osterville" and Kennebunk ; From Mattapuiset, Appledore, ‘And Swansea and a dozen more, Like Narragansett, Campobel- Lo, with its ancient ocean smell ; And Saccarap and Harwichport, And other spots that hold the fort ; Squibnocket and Aroostook, too— Names homely as a cast-off shoe. Whene'er a truck of trunks I meet, Jolting along the crowded street, And labels like these greet my eye, 1 lift my hat while they pass by. Cumso—« Why, I thought that S Hustle was bankrupt.” AN OLD STORY. s Banks—So he was; but he him CUAPYE—""! tefused to let him put his arm about my wast. We quarreled and parted. Now I wish had earned so much when he was poor Ernet—"' Ah, willful waist makes woeful want.” that he soon got rich again.” RESOURCEFUL WOMAN. “MY WIFE,” says the first husband, “bought her a tailored suit last spring and thought it would do to wear this fall.” “And will it?" asks the second husband. “No; but she is sure that she can buy one this fall that she can wear. next spring.” VAIN REGRETS. May—“ He's French and she's English. When first they met neither could understand a word the other said.” Jack— But they mar- ried, didn’t they 2” 1 May—“ Yes; and now “Well, if there ain't Sarah Ann with one of the most they wish they couldn't un- 2 beautiful fans | ever— derstand each other.’ —"' Goodness sakes! it's only her old turkey gobbler.”” comicbooks.com