Judge — September 13, 1902 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“The Four Track News” for Septem- ber is now winging its way all over the country and making every one that sees it” bristle with unalloyed happiness. “* Nature's Great Chronometer’ is an illus- trated article by W. W. Albaugh that will interest all watch manufacturers, as well as people who have to catch’ trains, “ Niagara" is a poem by Eben Rexford which has the sonorous music of the great waterfall ‘scattered generously through it. The “Adirondacks,” by Mark Twain, is an extract from a letter which proves conclusively that the great philosopher and humorist is an expert on the subject of dry air and what it will do for a frac- tured lung or a sidetracked appetite. “In Rin Van Winkle’s Land" is a poem by Minna Irving dealing with Sleepy Hollow in an entirely new and unusual way. “Love at First Sight.” though not a brand- new subject, is handled by Bingham ‘Thobum Wilson in a manner that will appeal to and win all people who know by experience the mysteries of that peculiar hand-out of fate. There are many other interesting papers, together with jokes, items of interest and information. There is also a set of “Vest Pucket Confi- dences" by the editor that will well repay the reader that capers through them For further information apply to George H. Daniels, general passenger agent, Grand Central station, New York City. The name of Sohmer & Co. upon a piano is a guarantee of its excellence. “ Has that college professor you called my attention to the other day made any new breaks?” “Nothing especially new. I believe he said yesterday that Homer was a wretched plagiarist who never existed, and that little children should be en: couraged to use epithets because they give life and vigor to the most_mo- notonous diction.” — Cleveland Plain Dealer. ‘Packer’s Tar Soap is pure, mild, invigorating and antiseptic. It soothes while cleansing, and for more than a quarter of a century has been The Standard | For the Hair and Skin ‘The Packer Mfg. Co., 81-83 Fulton St, New York. “This is a good bill," said the lobbyist, “why won't you vote for it?” “I have conscientious scruples that Prevent me,” replied the legislator. “Come off! When did you ever get those things?” “T've always had conscientious scru- ples against doing something for noth- ing." —Philadelphia Press. Strong and better men and women are those who use Abbott's, the original Angostura Bitters. Patience—" Did he ever invest in any of these get-rich-quick concerns?” Patrice—"Oh, yes; he married mon- ey."—Yonkers Statesman. “Advice, bredderen,” said: Uncle Ephe, “tam er good deal laik trubble; de less yo want de moh yo git, an’ de moh yo git de less yo want."—Colorado Spririgs Gazette. “Uncle,” said little Johnny, “tell me how you ‘charged with your war-horse up the San Juan hill at the head of your Ds, Well," said the battle-scarred_vet- eran, “i mounted the fiery animal, drew my sword from its scabbard, rose in my stirrups, cried ‘Forward!" and sunk the spurs deep in the quivering flanks of my gallant steed.” Yes!" exclaimed the boy, breath- | lessly. “Goon, uncle. Tell’ me the rest_ of it “There isn't any more to tell. Johnny,” said his uncle, with a pensive sigh. “The horse balked:""—Chicago Tribune. 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W. asth St., New York, publish a & Cox ga W. sth St. Ne a SOUTHERN PACIFIC RAILWAYS Tickets from any rallway agent 3 TRAINS DAILY Better live rich than die rich. Many who skimp themselves would live rich if they had a good policy of life insurance. Par- ticulars free. No importunity. Pexw Murvat Lyre, 921-3-5 Chestnut St., Philada. THE “SOHMER” HEADS THE LIST OF THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS SOHMER PIANOS Sohmer Building, frdrenter Sew Sth Ave, cor 22a st. York Lige—" Did yo’ heah "bout dat cullud man what died f'um eatin’ too many watahmillions?”” Rastus—"Too many watah-millions! I didn't know wuz dat many."— de New York Journal. “And you still insist that your flying- machine is a practical commercial quan- tity?” “1 do," answered the business-like inventor. “If you don’t believe it I can show you the gate receipts.""— Washington "Star. “What do you know about this man's reputation for truth and veracity?” asked the lawyer of the witness on the stand. “Well,” replied the witness slowly, with the air of a man who hesitates about speaking ill of a neighbor, “if this party you refer to should ever tell me 1 was Jooking well; I would send for a hospi- tal ambulance immediately.”— Syracuse Herald. You can't hold your own in the race of life nor take pleasure in any active exercise if your feet pain and ache. Woodbury’s Facial Soap is a wonderful rest-cure for tired feet. Makes you forget that you ever wore a shoe. Softens cal- lous places,iscooling,heal- ing,antiseptic; an ideal ‘soap for a foot tub. roposed it nlght, and’ —— did it ‘ack—"You're mistaken; I wasn’ pulse to see if m: ing as fast as delphia Press. heart was really beat- said it was.”"—Phila to Miss Mattie “I know just when it happened. I saw you holding her hand while you| holding her hand. She was feeling my Landlord—"In one word, ree) are ou going to pay your arrears?” : Hardap eater 1 ceil satisfy your | demands as soon as I receive the money which the publisher will pay me if he accepts the novel I am going to send him as soon as the work is niahed which | am about to commence when I have |found a suitable subject and the neces- sary inspiration.” —Tit-Bits. vend FINEST EXAMPLE OF WHAT ALE SHOULD BE. BORATED TALOUM 3 ple Pree. RN CO., Newark, N. 3. t Bl Unrival ‘stomach. Pagne, vate si 20-Hour Train to Chicago—20th Century Limited —NEW ‘or after meals J.\W. WUPPERMANH, Sole DR.SIEGERTS ANGOSTURA TTERS ThewWorlds Best Tonic Imported from Tiinidad ew: led appetizing tonic and stomach corrective, by physicians. A halfa wine-glass before or before retiring strengthens the jaded ‘A few dashes in pure liquor, sherry, or cham- e epicure’s delight. Indispensable on every pri- Jcboard. Refure imitations and cheap substitutes: None genuine except Dr. Si years. | Made only by Dr. J. Gr a ’s. On the market 70 G. B. Siegert & Sons. nd ‘eee KEW YORK, W. Y. ‘All Grecers YORK CENTRAL & LAKE SHORE, comicbooks.com