Judge, 1902-05-17 · page 4 of 16
Judge — May 17, 1902 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes a snobbish traveler visiting a Texas town who demands luxury accommodations. The landlord offers him a room with Judge Dingbatt, described as "one of our most prominent citizens" who uses quality tobacco. The traveler accepts, then discovers his roommate is a cow! The satire mocks Eastern pretension meeting Western frontier roughness. The fastidious traveler—concerned with cleanliness and social status—finds himself sharing quarters with livestock, deflating his pomposity. Secondary sketches include "A New One" showing children inventing a game called "ping-pong-golf," and "His Scheme," depicting a man's marriage proposal strategy. The humor relies on class contrast and frontier crudeness as comeuppance for affected snobbery—a recurring Judge theme mocking Eastern affectation.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘THE FASTIDIOUS TRAVELER. (A fable) A FASTIDIOUS traveler, who struck a Texas town simul- taneously with a county fair, found that the only hotel was crowded to a consid- erable degree. He could not secure a room to himse'f, though the land- lord was anxious to please. “Tean put you ina room with Judge Din, batt,” said mine host. “He is one of our most prominent citizens, uses a good quality of tobacco, and your roll will be as _safe in his presence as if His’ SOSHTIOR: in a safe. And he abhors Mr. Bixco—"'1 am a ‘floor-walker’ and ‘buyer’ for Lacem & diamonds.” Skirts.” So the fastidious traveler, Mr. Ban * Arduous job, It must bea great relief to get home who wore a lump of ice in his Alghts Mr. Binco—" Well, no; | am ‘ floor-walker’ and‘ buyer’ for that shirt-front, was sent to Judge Ding- house, too."* ' JUDGE'S FAVORITES. LULU GLASER. Most happy is your lot, Oh, dainty little Lulu, To captivate the Scot, ‘The German and the Zulu, The Briton and the Jap, ‘The Yankee and Castilian, ‘The Russian and the Lap- Lan-der, and the Brazilian, ‘Who watch you smile and pout Till, with your charms acquainted, They rise and fondly shout, “You're fairer than you're painted! ‘THE GREATER BURDEN. 46]S THERE anything harder to bear than trouble ?” [ asked of the intellectual man who Sat next to me in the smoker, “Only imaginary trouble,” he replied. From his answer I knew that I was correct in my surmise, He was indeed a member in good A NEW ONE. standing of the philosophers’ union. Cholly invents a new game—ping-pong-golf—and makes a great hit with the girls. batt’s room. Thirteen minutes later the fastidious traveler re- turned to the office and de- manded a new shuffle. “That Judge Dingbatt of yours may be all that you claim,” said the traveler, * but he went to bed with his boots on. Send me to some other sty.” The fastidious traveler was then sent to a room in which a cow man from Deaf Smith county was slumbering. The traveler made an_ inspection and found that the snoring oc- cupant of the bed not only was wearing his boots, but he had not removed his spurs. Moral—Even insomnia has its advantages. wa PERHAPS IT WAS, Mrs. Richmond—* What lovely antique furniture !" HIS SCHEME. Mrs. Bronxborough— wonder why old Perkins decided to marry again? | thought he was so devoted to his wife that he would always Yes; and, do you know, we remain true to her memory.” . He—"" Well, he sald that he had been giving wedding-presents for forty years, and he wanted a chance to make good on $0 it almost as cheap as if it the expense,” had been new." ‘Sue comicbooks.com