Judge, 1902-05-10 · page 6 of 20
Judge — May 10, 1902 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated satirical pieces typical of Judge magazine's format: **"Johnny's Explanation"** satirizes children's malapropisms—a young boy mistakes "gander" (male goose) for "rooster of the goose," a common humorous trope in period humor. **"His Sartorial Condition"** jokes about poverty through a poor man's claim that he's literally standing in the middle of his trunk—his only belongings—suggesting desperate circumstances. **"The First House-Cleaning"** appears to be a humorous fantasy about Adam and Eve, with Adam's wife giving away his fig-leaf trousers to a tramp monkey, playing on domesticity and the absurdity of prehistoric fashion concerns. **"More Money Needed"** satirizes contemporary perceptions of Bulgarian bandits (referencing Balkan conflicts of the era), joking that they need to kidnap more Christian missionaries to fund new costumes. The remaining pieces mock social pretension, flat-dwelling urban life, and genealogical snobbery about Mayflower ancestry. These are largely gentle domestic and social humor rather than pointed political satire.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JOHNNY'S EXPLANATION. NURSE was reading naturesstories of the chickens, ducks and geese. « Johnny, tell me, what's a she with a smile of peace, Little Johnny looked up quickly, all his fancy turning loose, As he answered, smiling proudly, “It’s the rooster of the goose." HIS SARTORIAL CONDITION. Mrs. Goodsoul— Are these all the spring clothes you have, my poor man ? Soiled Spooner —“\ regret ter say, maddim, dat I'm standin’ in de -middle uv me trunk at dis moment.” HE MISSED IT. . aR EEN Loa. HIS. INQUIRY. se]5 MR. GREEN at home?" asked the teireg_— We would like to have you identified, sir.” caller. McGinsis— Be this a morgue’ 2” No, but he will be in very soon,” € plained Mrs. Green. “He has been planting flowers this morning and has just gone down to the florists. You see, they sent the four-o'clocks up, but negletted to send the key to wind them with.” SSE . HER EXPERI- Photo by Halt. JUDGE'S FAVORITES. ENCE, POLLY CHASE. __ Mfrs. Bran- When, draped in pink pajamas, your smile ga —** Shure, upon us beams Oi} was. buyin’ You send our fancies sailing a sea of purple 4 shoring shirt We glide in poppied visions that moonlit ist Chues- ripples wreathe Och! On hyacinthine pinions and champagne 2 pa Yephyrs breathe, thim’s great ine vintions, thim Till In a topsy-turvy of hocus-pocus joy ehitdta® fe We're brimming with a rapture whose gold Shlidin’ shtair- knows not alloy. ses they hov While in this maze we linger we simply must confess ae You are an airy phantom in all your full une Mnt-shtores. dress. Mrs, Cassi« dy (critically) — hure, but they hov their faults, Oi wint up-shtairs on wan ay thim foine enough, to-day, but whin Oi troied to come back down on it, arrah! Oi had to all but run the ligs off av me.” at the depart. A FLAT-DWELLER’S VIEW. how the busy little bees he shining hours improve ! ‘acer # becades T'm sure they live in rented hives— Gtavys—"' Did his folks come over in the Mayflower ?"" always on the move. Erwe.—* | think quite likely. He has an idea that the Mayflower was a racing-yacht”" THE FIRST HOUSE- CLEANING. 6eéEVE,” asked Adam one bright May morning in the year 2," where are those best fig-leaf trousers of min “Were those your best ? inquired Eve. “1 thought you did not want them any more, and gave them to a tramp monkey that happened along.” Inwardly raging, Adam hied himself to the fig-patch and tried to find a pattern that matched his coat and vest. MORE MONEY NEEDED. HE Bulgarian bandit rushed from the shop of the Pari- an costumer and telegraphed Cog Eng ton to his comrades : “Capture ten more mis- A WARM SPRING IN JERSEY. sionaries at once. Otherwise First Jesevire—" They must be going to have a reception at Buildingloan's to-night.”" we get no new clothes thi ‘OND Jensevire—‘* Yes. | see they have put up a mosquito-netting passage-way from the front door out to the x ft hornew. SloMme - horse-block.”” spring. comicbooks.com