Judge — April 5, 1902 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

IN THE EASTER RUSH. 77 66 A YARD of pale-blue ribbon, a skein of Mihi green embroidery silk, and one-third Hi hi . of a yard of silk foulard.” : WM y He stands near the entrance to the store and mentions this to the suave floor-walker. That dignitary smiles and waves arm majest the left. Here, as the reporters love to say, a scene that bafiles descrip- tion meets his eye. Not that he is a one man, but somehow or other such a scene always meets the singular and not the eyes plural, This is a question that must be left to the psychologists for settle- ment. We have other and weightier matters to go into. As the scene baffles de- scription, we will tell what it is. A. struggling, twisting mass of femininity, from the midst of which comes a babel of sound, among which we distinguish : “Ca-ash took Molly to the matinee “Oh, E never could wear green. + Tl take that.” “Trim it in green ruch- eight cents? Why, your ad- vertisement says forty-sev- en!" he bon- nets are on the next fl" And soon. Into this maelstrom of women plunges our hero. Above the shrieks of last- day bargain. hunters rise his. clear-toned voi “A yard of pale- blue ribbon, a skein of green embroidery silk, and a third of a yard of silk foulard.” Tn an instant his hat is swept from his head, his coat is split up the back and his vest is twisted from south to north, Undaunt- ed, he presses on. A pale of yard blue ribbon, a silk of green em- skeinery broid and a yird of a thard of fool silkard, please,” he demands. Around he goes like a top. Sharp elbows jam in- to his ribs, unprotected by the steel strength of corsets. Piercing heels crush histoes, yet manfully he reiterates, rib of yard plue haleon, a skilk of seen em- broidery greek and a thard of a yird of filk soulard, you please.” IN STYLE. Wiue Buc—" Say. Miss Cluck, it's getting on toward Easter. Don't you want to have your eggs painted They always sell better that way.” 2 —____. [+ CHOmee Buin Oi’ gots FoR SALE. NO FAULT OF THE FAMILY. Crash! He is hurled against the counter. Smash! He is thrown into a show-case. What is he? A mere man. Why should he be per. mitted to rush in where angels fear to tread? Is this a time—the last day before Easter—for the working-half of humanity to make its début in the realm of one-cent reduction ? No; a thousand times no! Feebly he murmurs as he is trodden under Necrosis shoes. and jabbed with sixty-nine-cent umbrellas, A bard of yale rue plib- bon, a skeen of gilk embeinery boid, and a yird of a thard of filk soulard, if you will be so kind And when the porters came neat day, Liteless but beautiful he Aud high above this tearful vale There floated words : pard of yale, A grill of skeink embroidery And fool silkard—please wait on me !* wb. NesOrT. ON EASTER SUNDAY. “ Aren't you going to church, John ?" Husband—* Xo, my dear. [saw all the milli- nery I cared to see when I helped you buy your bonnet.” THE ONE HE WANTED. “eZE MISS Milyons, itis said, spen’s thousan’s of dollars on ze bonnets alone, my dear count,’ ob- ved the bar- on, i: ze one for you.” “No, my dear baron,” was the reply. “TL vill make ze proposal to her milliner.” * Say, dat kid ‘s a‘ beaut he looks like de devil!” reat + Well, yer can't blame our fambly—he come from heaven!” FORCE OF HABIT. D parser ( finishing his lown)— (as a large bird tlies before the vessel) —"Oh, captain, is that an omen ?" Matter-offact captain No, madam; that is a sea-gull.” BESSIE’S BONNET. JESSIE hath a dimpted chin, Mouth with smile upon it, Eyes of blue to glory in, But—she hath a bonnet. ‘That 's the only thing T see When she dares to don it ; Climax of all witchery Lies in Bessie’ ;, Yet, though I have sung the spell Oft in many a sonnet, ‘To this day I cannot te One thing that is on it. Were it off her dainty head, Who would care to con it? She's the charm, when all is said, Of her dainty bonnet. Next!” AMOS K. WELLS. comicbooks.com