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Judge, 1902-02-22 · page 11 of 16

Judge — February 22, 1902 — page 11: what you’re looking at

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Judge — February 22, 1902 — page 11: Judge, 1902-02-22

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertising and humor columns** rather than political cartoons. The main content includes: **The Central Narrative Piece** ("The Good Things I Intend to Do"): A satirical dialogue between a New Jersey farmer and a tramp, mocking the gap between charitable intentions and actual behavior. The farmer boasts of his kindness but has actually installed signs, bulldogs, and traps to keep tramps away—revealing hypocrisy about Victorian-era charitable pretenses. **The Advertisements**: Period products (Packer's Tar Soap, Evans' Ale, Arnica Tooth Soap, Sohmer Pianos) that document early 1900s consumer culture. **Small Humor Items**: Brief jokes about modern actors being overly elaborate, and a sarcastic exchange about a poor man refusing a charity dollar bill, preferring a crisp new note—satirizing both poverty and the inadequacy of casual almsgiving. The page's humor consistently targets **middle-class hypocrisy** regarding charity and respectability during the Progressive Era.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE GOOD THINGS I INTEND TO Do. “TL think Tha solved the trany a eT atend to do. inlem in a perfectly satisfactory \ poll hinge | waleod 10 ce she Now Jemey larmer sa the Advice to f jst that long ago was new” ct was under discussion. “It did no] With pleasure she indites. <ecps stretching out da aye xd whatever to put up signs warming In fact, she is so busy able to recognize at sight the twen- scrupon it now and the ** them off or to keep_a bulldog at the gate. | These dutics all to mect, ty-six fundamental characters upon which ‘dam surprised to find, somehow, | tried all that, and last spring I made a Her husband secks a restaurant the English language is based, I should re- ans | made long, long ago. change. I put up signs for three mile To get enough to cat, _ ‘ply to you that I leamed those when I nd good cheer and fescen woe around reading, "Tramps Call a —Philadelphia Bulletin. was a mere child." —Colunbus (Ohio) ed around the edges: now, re Baker Farm = State Fournal. : Welcomed. at Baker's Vigor of mind and strength of body are ate 4h still the happy thrill of old is that not three of them have called. | rendant upon the tse of 2 : “Don't you think that modern actors “| often mine. as gazing through | The other day, to show you how it works. | Anecstura Hitters. The great rejuvenators At AFC More repressed in their methods than a tramp cams along and looked things! (yee and grocers * NS the old-timers were?” asked the friend ood things I intend to do! over and said to me £ Y answered Mr, Stormington ‘Thi -e are the smiles that I shall bring “Any constables hidden in the barn? - come so clabo- To faces pale and sad, at last ‘ot a one,’ I replied. | “No, indeed, I will not take it,” pro- rate and expensive tha ve to carry re the worthy tasks that when {How many bulldogs you got?” tested the destitute man__ ourselves with 1 aution in order plished shall be praised of men “*None at all |. Nonplussed, we gazed first at him,and not to damage it shington Star. , oh, the days go rushing past! **Got a lot of spring guns or bear traps | then at the worn ten-dollar bill we had _ : about the place? sought to induce him to accept for the old St. Peter at the gate, Nothing of the kind.” benefit of himself and the starving fam. Dr Cash ow, there is a picture 1 When I, at last, approach you, pray a feller got to de y’swork to|ily he had mentioned with such pitiful: paid $2,009 for in Paris son Do not unkindly bid me w rect Homer—"You don’t say? The frame “O: roughly hustle me | "No work at all You come right in No, sir,"" he continued, “Iam entitled ; must be solid gold." —Chicago News out shall swing the portal wide | and 1 will give a » meal for to a nice, crisp, new tendollar note, and | d, smiling, n gh nothing, andif you ight that’s what I insist on. Wwen't reac a oo ad a ha oe en en epi “i Ml give you the best bed in. the house.” | these stories of philanthropy for noth- in u ie {Oh, Herald, the hall tis: df'nen get credit there “He looked at me in a puzzled jing."—Baltimore American ctor fey (olend papery rmissed snc good things they intend to do. for a minute.” continued the farmer, _ jer. Had it struck “her she would have —Chicago Record-Herald ven cane oy thar iste eae on! "Miss Alice,"" said the nervy, young a You don't me, old man. Thieis my sixtecnth year! man, “T think’ I will marry you.” (Aside) T always di@ s: dat at Pan-American Exposit Ga the roads 2 ‘ “Indecd?. Two very remarkable state slow." —Indianapuliy 2. Sicgert’s Imported Angastura Bitters. “But what game?" I asked ments, sir! Putting poison in the milk and Two! How two: ing our cadavers to a medical college for} “One that you will marry me; | the an the Chairman of i Oh, no, Mr. Bal not this Other that you think.""—Baltimore News. the committee, “to discuss ways and | evel!"—Baltimore Herald. | — means for securing the passage of our bill —— Figicller—" Oh. yes; it's great medi- Wee eemarked one who was some-| _ The Sohmer Piano ranks among the best for cine, au Fight! Thres. months ag the thinyof a lobbyist, "I know the surest of | eellence of tone, durability and fin only pleasiare-| had in Ife was smolang all ways if we only have sufficient means." | ioaies Now .1 havent aay tease | Melee pias Fees | _ First tramp—" Did you hear about that [ure in life, Doe." “Chicago News. ‘new law fer teachin’ ‘the school-children ef about the effects of liquor your lies Brice, 5 cents. * | provided fer the appointment of a terrible ease example fer cach school, at a big sala you and I might have struck a | Town and Country. On subjects culinary Rut lady—" Do you know your let- i little boy? ‘oston prodigy (aged z)—"If you to ask, madame, whether or not Gues: long hi Watter a ' oe - Guest—" Oh, is that all! s FOR p MEN OF BRAINS have given my order to some other| waiter.” —Chicago Daily News IGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST— ‘These Cigars are manufactured under the most favorable climatic conditions and from the mildest blends of Havana to- bacco. If we had to pay the imported Wherever 6 RENE ROORE oe cigar tax our brands would cost double the Fine money. Send for booklet and particulars. is pure, mild, invigorating and = Whiskies are} CORTEZ CIGAR CO., KEY WEST. antiseptic. It soothes while cleansing, and for more than a YOU ARE SAFE quarter of a century has been nep Tor Ryn. The Standard Rarer FerdinandWestheimer& Sons, : For the Hair and Skin 16 NT aie, COtton Wash Fabrics. Plain and Embroidered Panama Suitings, ‘The Packer Mfg. Co., 81-83 Fulton St., New York. 1s, Figured Swisse Embroidered Batiste Printed I 4 French Piques, Croquet Checks. No Friend Like An Old Friend. David and Anderson's THE “SOHMER” HEADS THE refreshingto 4 Ginghams and Cheviots. LIST OF THE HIGHEST and know ae GRADE PIANO: Naveto be taken on faith. Years of Silk Ginghams. experi "Club Cocktails” the perfect blend of liquors. hey are, anil years of use have made them house- th hold words allover the country, Ask at any hotel, club-howse, 19tb &. cafe or fancy grocer, which ts the best, and the answer every: ne will be the “Ciub Cocktails.” ‘The secret of their wel NEW York. erved popularity is that they are made entirely by actual Weight and measurement,trom the best quality of liquors, and Pept aie months belore being bottled, thus ensuing @ per ROMEIKE?’ Press Carting re wa : PIA cet drial sfrtere ‘The ™ Club Cocktails” are made in seven varieties: Man: ppear a tan, Martins Vermouth, Holland Giny York, Tom Gin,and | any suvec ; eprail of the same ubitorm migh grade; and ail worthy of 9 | Bs ; sdasen SvRaMey allot the une asltormnien rede; and elt Wore nite uate 4 wr Sohmer Building, | (°y,Susrg2 ‘he only brand of Cocktails listed by the best nouses inthis Sth Ave., cor. $24 St. York. country, Also served on the buffet and dining cars of the = -- prit railroads. § HENRY LINDENMEYR & SONS, All kinds kept in stock G. F. HEUBLEIN & BRO., Sole Proprietors. PAPER WAREHOUSE, tand made to order by 29 Broadway, New York. Hartford, Conn. 20 Piccadilly, London, 9 | Brace So ee FINDLER & WIBEL, A [ALL EINDs OF PAPER MADE TO ORDER. 1121 Nassau Street, New York. comicbooks.com