Judge, 1902-01-11 · page 4 of 16
Judge — January 11, 1902 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated humorous sketches and jokes typical of Judge magazine's format: **"Judge's Favorites"** celebrates actress Elsie Ferguson with a poem praising her theatrical talents across various roles. **"The Worse Always Happens"** and related sections present brief comic dialogues about everyday misfortunes—a stolen watch, a passenger without money, and observations about women's complexions and men's sensitivity to cold. **"Quite Warm Enough"** depicts a domestic scene where a wife ironically insists the house is warm while sitting near a fire, contradicting her cold husband's complaints. **"The Danger Points"** shows a hunter with dogs, focusing on shooting safety concerns. The page reflects early 20th-century Judge magazine's mix of theatrical commentary, domestic humor, and genteel satire aimed at middle-class readers—with no apparent political messaging.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
- Rape! JUDGE'S FAVORITES. ELSIE ESMOND. Elsie, Elsie, you're the bona Fide gem that makes All the play of Arizona Gather al! the cakes. Critics never murmur “ nixey When you grace the scene, For you are a trixy pixy And a fairy queen. Satin-clad or e’en in kersey, You would make a go Of a drama on New Jersey, ‘And the critics know. as, out for gold and glory. ‘can dramatize Every state and territory For you are the prize That can play “* * Kansas.”” “ Mississippl,"’ South Dakota” And" New Mexico.” Maine,"’ ** Minnesota,” And your features as you teeter On the board, you bet, Would, card-mounted, make much sweeter Any cigarette. Guive —""Oh, it ain't your head that’s worryin THE WORSE ALWAYS HAPPENS. Cobwigyer —" Mt was rather hard having your watch taken out of your pocket.” I should say so. It was stolen when ay to pawn it.” A SUGGESTION. Bless me! I'm afraid [haven't a cent Must I get off the car?” Conductor— Well, Fcan't let you ride, might go to the office and report the case to the super- intendent.” A.WOMAN'S WAY. “TL wonder why she bothers so much about her complexion Marjorie + Esuppose it’s be she hasn't d neral—« Was Colonel Bragy cool when the gan to fly?” The major—* Cool? shivered like a leaf. He was so blamed cold he QUITE WARM ENOUGH. Tue coLp sor—" My goodness! but this is a cold fire.” Tue rine—" You are mistaken, my dear boy: | am not cold, Don't you see | have a mantel over me?” THE DANGER POINTS. “You needn't look anxious, me. RTSMAN I shall keep my head,"* NOT THE SAME. Voice From up-stains—"* Johnnie, are you children in those pre- serves?” Jounwie—" Nom’. "* (in a lower tone) “those preserves is in us.”* THE BOSTON CHILD. 660 you like your new ball, D Waldo ?* “Yes, Lam pleased with its modeling, texture and resil- ience.” a ere: It's mine and the dogs !"" comicbooks.com