Judge — September 1, 1900 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Ade PUBLISHED ONCE 4 WEXK AT THE JUDGE BUILDING. Terms to Subscribers. UNITED STATES AND CANADA IM ADVAMCA. 1 year, of $2 numbers. ‘months. or 26 numbers ~ Wasraan Omice— Henry Bright, manage Eunoraan sains-acents—/ntermational mews compan, idimg, Chancery las 7. B.C Lom jeenue del Opéra, Paris; Saarbach's mews exchange, Mains, Gormany. (€97- Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly In the world. EW NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Jvoce are protected by copyright it borntthe United States and Great Britain niringement of thin copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted ‘THE PROHIBITIONISTS' CAMPAIGN—Great ery and little Wool-ley. . AMERICAN MULES and newspaper correspondents are first in the field IS THE SLOTH EXTINCT? THE ST. JAMES GAZETTE fears the sloth is extinct, but extends its best wishes to the party of English sci- entists who are now searching for tnat interesting creature in the wilds of South America. Maybe they will find him there; but we should like to know why they have neglected Philadelphia. ; IN HIS STEPS. HE REVEREND C. M. SHELDON, who ran a profane newspaper for a week in Topeka, Kansas, and charged supernatural advertising rates, has been visiting England and telling them over there how things might be done. At last we have got even with Mr. W. T. Stead for writ- ing “If Christ came to Chicago.” A SHIRT-WAIST LAUREATE. . ACCORDING to Leslie Stephen in the “ National Diction- ary of Biography,’ Wordsworth as poet laureate wore the same coat to levees that Samuel Rogers had worn, and the coat passed subsequently to Tennyson when he became poet laureate. But it did not descend to Alfred Austin, Y wherever there is war or rumor of war. eae Ex -PRESIDENT HARRISON is ep- igrammatic as well as profound, “Why,” he golf is not a game; it is a disease.” VoTING-MA- CHINES—Those half-dozen or so solid Democratic southern states. Any old Dem- ocratic nominee can run them, eee H ENRY WAT- TERSON couldn't - speak more highly of Roosevelt if he were on the other ticket, Mr. Watterson is enough of a soldier and an honest man to have no desire to underrate the enemy. | AS CY PRIME of the “Old Home- stead" says, Bryan won't get enough votes in New England to wad an old Revolutionary musket. him to see himsel’ as ithers see him! Cassipy—* Whoy? Cosrica: Oh, wad some power the giftie gie R. BRYAN wants the Boers to immigrate to this country. They would undoubtedly make good citizens, and it is comforting to reflect that they can't embarrass matters by naturalizing for the November elec- tion, HAT PRESIDENT HARPER of the Chicago University has dem- onstrated by his recent and much-discussed experiment is that a man can live on fifteen cents’ worth of food a day by hir- ing a scientist to do his marketing and a hundred-dollar- a-week chef to superintend the kitchen. ++] WAS ONLY lightly armed at the time,” remarked a witness in the Goebel trial, “having but two pistols on my person” (they were both six-shooters). This gentle ‘mountaineer was innocent of all humorous intent. He was bred in Old Kentucky, where the meadow-grass is blue; that’s all. HIS REASON. Costican—"* Casey hozn't drank a dhrop since he took out the ‘ accident policy. * He sez he’s noticed thot it's always sober men thot gits hurted.” laureate. the present incumbent. = 15 He is a_ shirt - waist —— Hr\ Wo S TO ST. PAUL. THE ANTI-HAT CRUSADE has received a setback, so far as the churches are concerned, by the dis- covery of a Hacken- sack clergyman that St. Paul says (I. Corin- thians, xi), “ Every woman: that prayeth or prophesieth with her head. uncovered dis- honoreth her head: for that ‘is even all one as if she were shaven.” This makes it all right, girls, about your East-" er bonnets; but re- member, Paul is talk- ing about the church, not the theatre, | ACCORDING pases 4 ¥ BILL’S BAD BREAK. OLONEL BILL HOHENZOL- LERN, who is fortu- nate in holding a life position as Emperor of Germany, has sent his soldiers to China with the fierce injunction to slash in arid give no quarter, take no prisoners, and that sort of thing. His apologists explain that this was merely a case of atavism—that it wasn’t William himself who made the speech, but only the spirit of his warlike ancestors breaking out in him, He was talking through his grandfather's hat. BRYAN’S “PARAMOUNT ISSUE,” SENATOR HOAR is all right. In his recent ringing declaration of allegiance to che Republican party be says he believes the future of ‘he Philippine Islands safer in the hands of Mr. McKinley than it would be in those of Mr. Bryan. And he adds, “Mr. Bryan earnestly advocated the treaty which bought the Philippine Islands, and secured for it the votes of seventeen of his supporters. For this action of his no motive can be reasonably argued but the desire to keep the question for an issue in the campaign.” And now it is his “paramount issue,” to be worked for all it is worth. The little matter of free silver “cuts no ice,” as a Tammany man might say. comicbooks.com