Judge — August 4, 1900 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

1 want no fine thermometer To tell me of the weather. T have a rule that's better than All others put together. I simply note what's left me by The iceman—haughty ruler. If small the day will warmer be ; If large it will be cooler. —Washington Star, People who take DR. SIEGERT'S Angos- tura Bitters in the spring don’t suffer from chills and fever and malaria in July and August. Beware of poisonous domestic substitutes. Yo' seldom admire a man yo' see a great deal ob.—People git wisdom by experience. A man nebbah wakes up his secon’ baby to see it laugh.—Ebery man beliebes he carries de heavy end ob de log.—Man's economy is in tellin’ his wife how to save money.—Arkansaww Thomas mach. whatever Late, ‘one bite. ne rarely and shook bis wise ead, if youl fo! Tid as be told rm ToRLPANS For after ove box I John,” she asked, "* do you ever play poker for profit?’ “No,” he replied thoughtfully ; the game serves as my way of being charita- ble."—Philadelphia North American, A FINANCIER, He was president of a railroad, and so terribly close was he He hated to let the conductor and engineer ride free. And once a train struck a farmer's cow and threw her into the air, And she lit on the cow-catcher coming down, and they didn’t know she was there, She was carried twelve miles before they stop- ped, and what could the farmer do? For the cow, by a miracle, wasn’t hurt, so he had no grounds to sue; And on top of that he received a bill which made him sweat and swear— For the president wouldn't give up his cow till he paid her railroad fare. —Edmund Vance Cooke in July New Lippin. cot, Take a tonic in time and prevent sickness, Abbott's, the Original Angostura Bitters, is the best tor Miss Verber—"1 suppose there is no doubt about it that the French are a very polite peo- ple.” Miss Tarwker—"* Ves; but, then, so ig- norant! It was quite impossible for me to find any one with whom I could converse intelli- gently. They do speak their language so dif- ferently from the way we do who have had the advantage of a liberal education,"—Beston Transcript. Jarley—"" Don't you think they carry the tipping system to extremes here?’ Iilloughby —"'T should think they did. Why, it's got so bad that you actually have to tip your hat to bow to a lady."—Harvard Lampoon, REVEN js worth a pound of cure. action of the stomach, liver and Keep the wels in a normal condition’ by eliminating all poisonons material from the blood, and you “Will prevent the development of any form of Abbey’s Effervescent Salt “THE ‘SALT' OF SALTS" used regularly aids digestion, promotes excretion, rifles the blood and clears the complexion. It prevents and cures Constipation, Dyspepsia, jiliousness, Sick Headache, Flatulency, Kidney and Liver troublesand all ills caused by adisordered-condition of thestomach and bowels. It is ‘Nature’s remedy, mado from tho salts extracted from the juices of fresh fruits, pleasant to thetaste with absolutely no reactionary or unpleasant results from its constant use, DR. J C. CABLE, Brooklyn, N.Y , sa fents taking Ab ys: Thave four of bey's Sait'reqularly with great benefit. ic the finest liver and intestinal favigorator on the ket, and shall certainly prescribeit rightalong. * Sold by most druggists, or sent by mail, 25e,, 50c., 81.00 Per boitle. THE ABBEY EFFERVESCENT SALT CO., 11 Murray St. Room 1, New York, Booklet free on request. A better Cocktail at home than is served over any bar in the World, GF. HE CLUB = T eecniis MANHATTAN, MARTINI, WHISKEY, HOLLAND GIN, TOMGIN, VERMOUTH and YORK. Wo guarantes these Cocktails to be made of absolutely pureand well matured liquors and the riizing equal to the best cocktails served over any berin the world, Being compounded in accurate proportions, they will always be found of uniform quality. Connolwseurs agree that of two cocktails made of the same material and propor- Jons the one which ts aged must be the setter. ‘Try our YORK Cocktail made without any sweetentng—dry and delicious, For Sale on the Dining and Buffet Cars of the principal railroads of the U. 8. AVOID IMITATIONS. For Sale by all Draggists and Dealers. HEUBLEIN & BRO, Sole Props., 29 Broadway, N. Y., Hartford, Conn. 20 Piccadilly, W. London. Eng. An Irishman who had but tecently arrived in this country applied to a Scotchman for a job. The Scotchman decided to give Pat a trial—also a little advice. ‘It will be your i in this coun- Twenty years ago I ianded in New York with but one shirt to my back ; but since then, by my own exer- tions, I have managed to accumulate a million.” “Faith, an’ Oi'd loike to be afther knowin’ phwat any man wants with a million shirts!" exclaimed Pat. ‘*He can't wear more than wan at a toime, begorry !"—Chicago News. “* Her eyes are like rubies, Her teeth are like pearls; Her lips, they are rubies— She's a jewel among girls.” "Twas thus that he sang Ere they wed. She has met All his expectations— Like a jewel, she's “set.” —Philadelphia Bulletin, Suspicion is the key-note of all wisdom and dissatisfaction is the essence of all greatness.— Agnosticism {s rationalism and religion is ego- tism,—All religions are the result of the at- tempt to measure the infinite with a foot-rule. Cornell Widow. Tt was a hot day and the elephant was thirsty. “haven't had anything to drink to-dai said, turning to the camel, ‘I am told you carry a supply for three or four days. Could you place a few of your concealed water-pouch- es at my disposal without too much inconven- ience?" ‘'I'don't have to carry water for the elephant,” irritably answered the camel, hump- ing itself along still faster. ‘I am a part of the show."—Chicago Tribune, “Adam,” said Eve, "you can stay at home ‘evenings now and take care of the baby instead of staying out so late at the Simian club.” Then it was that Adam began to raise Cain.— Balti- more American, “anywhere bat| ‘cedangers bis happiness; Jeo medicines prescribed Sey Bet genomes fo Doe Keeley i do Produce each a disease having definite pathol ogy. The disease yields easily to the Double Chloride of Gold Treat- ment as administered at the following Keeley Tnstitutes : PROM MARPER'S WEEKLY he che cures of culization, |More men fi Secbored againgt i metheds a hussane and intelligent tr tly beahhy. una and Blair, Keb. Carsea (M7, Nets Kerth Coaway, X Wate Palos, X.Y. Battle, 8, V0 S01 a Capltad Datght, 11, Marie, tod. Plainbeld, ted. Crab Orebard, “NonsHeredity of Inebriety.” by Dr. Leslie E- Kecley, mailed upon rather than die rich. a policy in the Pax Murvat Li 1-3-5 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia. One should prefer to live rich Even the poorest may live.rieh if he carries EARL & WILSON’S ( COLLARS CUFFS &SHIRTS BEST IN THE WORLD. (i! THE “SOHMER” HEADS THB LIST OF THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS. SOHMER PIANOS Sohmer Building, Sth Ave., cor. 22d St. Juncn’s splendid portrait of McKinley framed in gold and surrounded by the Stars and Stripes. The portrait, frame and five flags complete for. $2.50. The back of the frame is fitted with sockets in which the poles of the flags rest. The size of the new decorative piece, measuring from flag-tip to flag-tip, is 45 x 50 inches, It is packed complete and will be for- warded by express to any address on receipt of remittance of $2.50. Every Republican household will want oue ot these ; there can be nothing prettier nor more appropriate for this campaign, Address JUDGE COMPANY, 110 Fifth Avenue, NEW YORK CITY. CHICAGO AND WEST—LAKE SHORE LIMITED—The New York Central.