Judge, 1900-06-09 · page 13 of 16
Judge — June 9, 1900 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is primarily an **advertising page** from Judge magazine (June 1902 issue), with minimal political/satirical content. The few jokes present are mild social commentary: 1. **"The Boers" quip**: References the ongoing Boer War (1899-1902), jesting that Boer resistance persists because their women are occupied with spring plowing—a light swipe at rural life priorities. 2. **"Legitimate Mystery"** anecdote: A theater patron says the playwright's play is "hard work"—gentle theater criticism. 3. **"Crowbar" parable**: Warns against unhelpful aid; appears designed as moral instruction rather than satire. The page is dominated by period advertisements: Wilson Whiskey, Schlitz Beer (emphasizing purity and sterile bottling), Spalding Bicycles, and travel guides to Colorado and California. The Schlitz ad is notably lengthy, marketing beer as a health product requiring pharmaceutical-level cleanliness—reflecting early-1900s advertising claims before modern FDA regulations. No identifiable political figures or caricatures appear on this page.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ADVICE, ‘There's time enough before you, child— Dont hurry. And (retting only drives you wild— Doa’t worry. The world’s experience has been That calm persistency will win, And so one can do good workin A flurry. Fore!-oding will your spirit crush— Don't worry. No ran can work best in a rush— Dont hurry. Bat calmly do the best you know, ‘And you can pay up all you owe, ‘And maybe own an automo- bile surrey. —Somerville Journal, “The Boers hold out well.” ‘Yes; they won't show any signs of letting go until their women get all the spring plowing done."—/n- dianapolis Journal. The firm of Sohmer & Co, give a written guarantee to every purchaser of a piano of their make that, if the instrument does not give en- tire satisfaction, and is not in every way as represented, they will take it back and refund the money. "The firm has never been compelled to take back an instrument, which speaks vol- umes for their excellence and high rank. “Oh, yes; they had been secretly engaged for at ‘least’ a year before their marriage. “Who told you?" ‘Why, everybody knew "—Times-Herald, Established 1823. WILSON WHISKEY. That’s All! {—B WILSON DISTILLING CO., Baltimore Md. ‘LEGITIMATE MYSTERY.” 2%¢ rarest pam) He was overboard, struggling for life and . ve. | shouting for help. Some one threw him a “—| crowbar. The’ intention was kindly, but the Vhat do you think of my play?" asked the |, iderate. Consider the aid you ie Play?’ granted the exdiog ean, (ee x *Pay nothing! It's hard work."—PAtlade/- | intend for your family. jit North American, Pawn Murvat Lire, pe Chestnut Street, Umear Photographers. are Prizes. $500 Philadelphia. fe, ae ames battdlng. Sew 4 Lite Ine. | COPS ECZEMA CURE, $1 Soe ceen Concicreland.0: PUBLISHED JUNE 15th. TO PRESS JUNE 8th. Judge’s Greatest Special Issue Belated Advertisers should bestir themselves. JUDGE COMPANY, 110 Fifth Avenue, New York. In the Schlitzbrewery you will find a plate- glass room. In it are cooling pipes, over which the hot beer drips. Above it is an air filter, and no air comes to this room save through that filter. No germs can reach beer handled with such But, after the beer is aged, we filter it, then bottle and seal it, then sterilize rare caution. every bottle. We take triple pre- cautions because beer is a saccharine product. Impurities multiply if There is no grade between they get into it. absolute purity and utter impurity. Every bottle of Schlitz is absolutely pure, and purity is healthfulness. Your physician knows--ask him. t. H2, 241 W, 44th St, New York. A THOROUGHBRED SPALDING BICYCLES A thoroughbred that requires little care. CLIMBS HILLS EASILY. CONQUERS MUD AND DUST. A successon all kinds of roads in all kinds of weath Bevel-Gear Chaialess . . . . Chala Models... $40 ana 380 SPALDING CATALOGUR S¥T OW REQUEST. SPALDING BICYCLE, No.83 Chambers New York city. cane a “Avenue, perry Avenue, ‘You will get more, by mentioning Jobe. OPIUM é By ‘Ts the milk you get at home Pasteurized?” “No; I don’t believe it's even pasture-ized.”* —Cleveland Plain Dealer, We publish two books ‘The Ritles are Colorado California ‘There are two kinds of books, Qoexthe cheap sort, exaggerated tn statement, poorly’ done, given The other—of it. informative, Seautifaly fisted: panied br ‘experts on fine paper; a Qur books are of the second kind. tivated i Guleivated people ie thems Pill ygu send for them to fe RETA, comicbooks.com