Judge — May 19, 1900 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Side PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK AT THE JUDGE BUILDING. Te UNITED STATES AND CAMADA 1H ADVANCE One copy, one year, or 52 numbers One copy, six months. or 20 number One copy: for thirteen weeks == faciuding the Cuuistaas Juoce FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS — To all foreign countries in the postal union, $6.00 Evaorsaw sai s— E, Gu London Brentane's CORNER FIFTH AVENUE AND SIXTEENTH STREET, NEW YORK. Bream's building, Chancery lane, VSaarbach's mews exchange, Mains, "27 Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly In the world. £9 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juooe are protected by copyright in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. Y OUR GOVERNOR—"“ Fair play for all. Sufficient unto the day is the honor thereof.” HE HARMONY in the Republican party is a choice article—there isn't a ruffle on it. eee HE SLAPPING of the face of M. Simyan in the French chamber of deputies may possibly be advanced as further proof of the Darwinian TO THE VICTOR, ETC. 1, Parson Swices (after the benediction, suddenly)—"* 'Skuze me, Deak’ sees dat yo'r wife carries an umbrella I'll jes’ borrer youahs, good ‘nuff ef it sho'd storm.” IMMY WOODRUFF'S STATE stood at his back, but it appears to have been for the purpose of kicking him. ee WHEN A SENATOR says he doesn’t understand poker it may be inferred that some of his compatri- ots have convinced him of it. see T 1S HOPED that the Paris exposi- tion buildings will be finished before the close of the show, and there are fears that the republic will, anyhow. THE SULTAN lies out of his debts; but, like the country landlord who overcharged his customers, he has the fine old excuse—" fact is, he needs the money.” A CLERGYMAN of Cleveland says a church may accept stolen money because the acceptance sanctifies the cur- rency. A theology that hurts a church's pocket may in time become as unpopular as that part of the Presbyterian creed that nobody is expected to preach but all must silently indorse. Nebber mind ‘pologi 2. Parson Swiccs (at home)—"' I's inside dat umbrella fo' some time.” (Succession of gurgles.) INTERNATIONAL JUSTICE. A NEW ORLEANS PRECEDENT must be considered. We paid Italy for the mobbing and murder of several Italians. Now let Italy pay us for the murder by Italians of an American soldier. It is a poor rule that doesn’t work both ways. ART IN DRESS HE EDITOR of the Buffalo Express attacks the rainy-day skirt, de- claring that it is not half as graceful as the rainy-day trousers, which differ from the ordinary trousers merely in the fact that they are turned up at the bottom. That man would attack anything. We think, for our part, that the shorter the skirt is the more inviting itis. * UNPROFITABLE LIES. THE LIARS that made Cleveland indorse Dewey are unscrupulous, but they are not as idiotic as the newspapers that permitted them to do it. Why lie when the truth is necessarily as expeditious as the lie itself? If publishers are not jealous of their reputation for morality they ought at least to see that their self-respect and their common sense are treated with respect. HONORS ARE EASY. AGUINALDO is doing this country a favor by remaining absent. If he were to be caught the question as to what to do with him would have to be discussed, and it might lead to a revolution, We didn’t hang Jefferson Davis, and it would hardly do to hang the young man. As a prisoner he would be a nuisance. It wouldn't be advisable to hold him without a trial, and if he were tried for treason it would be hard to save his neck. We are better off without him, and he is better off without us. THEOLOGY THAT KILLS. ‘THE PRESBYTERIANS must have a creed which clergy- men are not afraid to preach, or they must lose their churches, their clergy and their congregations, Much has been said of late years as to the loss in prestige of this denom- ination. Has the old creed nothing to do with it? Would it not be strange if parents and lovers of justice and fair play in the matter of redemption should not protest in all possible ways against the savagery of the creed which is too horrible to preach though not horrible enough to be annihilated? WHAT! NO JOHNNYCAKE? THE JOHNNYCAKE, according to the Boston /ournal, is “rapidly becoming only a memory.” There is in this calm announcement the shadow of a great crime. If there are women in New England who can make johnnycake and refuse to do it, they should be indicted as if for a conspiracy and punished as if for a deliberate criminal omission. To ignore johnnycake when there are the means for its produc- tion is to omit water in case of a conflagration and prayer in case of a great public calamity. It would serve New England right to take her glory as to corn away from her and give it to Kansas. It would even be just to deny her all the glory she has won from her pumpkin-pie. Let there be an anti- matrimonial association in New England at once, composed of young men pledged never to marry women who ‘are not artists in the production of johnnycake. s bin suspectin’ dat misabul deakin ob concealin’ a cuss comicbooks.com