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Judge, 1900-02-03 · page 14 of 16

Judge — February 3, 1900 — page 14: what you’re looking at

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Judge — February 3, 1900 — page 14: Judge, 1900-02-03

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily an **advertising page** with one notable satirical poem titled "Something Wrong." The poem, attributed to the Philadelphia Press, satirizes British military performance during the **Second Boer War** (1899-1902). The speaker addresses "Tommy Atkins" (a generic term for British soldiers) with mock indignation: despite Britain's military reputation and repeated "patting on the back," the soldiers are failing against the Boers ("Oom Paul Kriiger" and "Joubert"). The satirist sarcastically suggests the solution is aggressive recruitment and imperial expansion ("rule from Cape to Cairo"). The satire's point: British military prowess was being exposed as overrated by resistance from Dutch/Boer farmers in South Africa. For American readers, this would have been timely commentary on a major conflict dominating 1900s headlines, mocking British confidence while their colonial adventure struggled. The remainder is standard period advertising for typewriters, pianos, medicines, and household goods.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

This machine will work as no other typewriter works ¢ more easily, more swiftly, longer and better; because #’sa Remington WYCKOFF, SEAMANS & BENEDICT, 327 Broadway, New York. THE “SOHMER” HEADS THE LIST OF THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS. SOHMER PIANOS Sohmer Building, 94, Suer~m St Avon corr 2ad nee? fe,grenter Ncw THAT SOUR SPOT IN DIGESTIVE ORGANS <> DIGESTIVE TABLETS Telegram from Russia: “*SEND TO ANITCHKOFF PALACE, ST. PETERSBURG, IMMEDIATELY ANOTHER CASE OF VIN MARIANI| FOR HER IMPERIAL MAJESTY EM- PRESS OF RUSSIA.” Ordered by the Court Physicians, Q@IARIANI WINE) WORLD FAMOUS TONIC. Prominent People Everywhere Use It. Sold by all druggists. & Co. 82 W. 15th 4 m4 tah ‘sent gratis and postpaid to all who You will get more prompt attention and better service by mentioning Jupex when answering advertisements, SOMETHING WRONG. What's the matter, Tommy Atkins—are you drunk, or mad, or bad? Have I patted you so’often on the back That you've turned a bloody silly And are acting like a gilly, A-letting Oom Paul Kriiger whack and whack? Why, from every hill and valley these howling Dutchmen sally, And they plunk away the army's very core. You're a bunch of feeble friskers— Can't you pull old Joubert’s whiskers? Pshaw! T thought that Alf and Rud would win this war. But I’m scouring the highways and I'm clean- ing out the byways, And I'll ship the nation southward to a man. I'm recruiting all the classes, I'm enlisting all the masses, And I'll rule from Cape to Cairo—if I can. —Philadelphia Press. Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup ts the safest and surest cure for those dangerous affections of the litle ‘ones—croup, whooping-cough and measles’ cough. Physicians prescribe it, children like it, and doses are small, Price, 25 cents Several young English noblemen have en- listed for service in the British-Boer war. This is well enough, but it will still be necessary to take a good ‘many men who are really of some use at home.—Rochester Union, The Sohmer pianos are pronounced superior to all others by leading artists, The late Dwight Moody was a man who thought less of saving himself than of saving others. But in saving others he developed the highest and best that was in himself.—Ruches- ter Democrat, 310 First Premiums Avarded to the PRAIRIE STAT pNoURA ‘0 ia any climate, Be for catalogue. PRAIRIE STATE INCUBATOR CO, Homer City, Pa. jaaranteed to operas EARL & WILSON'S ARE THE BEST SALE E A COLLECTION OF a Pictures of the American Girl, artistically printed on | plate paper and tastefully bound in an ilfu- | minated cover. Sold by your bookseller, by all hotel news-stands, and by the boy on the train, YOU WANT IT. out! tres Une, pariges stores lost manhood. nts an nteed THE LITTLE SOLDIERS IN YOUR BLOOD. arhich the corpuscles of the blood play in makin good! ie Pitas occasioned: f the body by weat aod tear, and if Carrying off the effete or worn-out material, has been compared to the part played by a soldier, ‘The corpuscles of pure blood are cour soldier-friends, who repair the worn-out tissues of the body, and fight against disease-germs. The first condition for good health {s pure blood, and that can only be obtained and kept by taking pure food and drink| ‘Adulterated food-stufis and drinks are the pests of the modern market, and all too often health considera- tions are sacrificed to apparent cheapness. If you would have a pure drink, take cocoa; but let it be a es re cocoa, such as Van Houten's, which is highly digestible, reremely soluble, and of most delicious taste. It is cheap, too, for it costs less than a cent a cup. , It is easily made; it has an attractive aroma; and it contains more ent than an equal quantity of the best beef tea. BE SURE YOU TRY _VAN HOUTEN’S Eating CHOCOLATE. 875.00 TO $250.00 A MONTH AGENTS EAR ‘SELLING TRANSPARENT HANDLE KNIVES, ‘An article of every-day use—every person @ posal- le customer—best Of materials and workmananip. jaune, address and emblems of societies and trades, photod, ete. beneath handles, “Many other advai tages. "Makes large and rapid sales, WE WANT AGENTS EVERYWHERE. Good Commission Pak Send 2c, stamp for terms and circulars. NOVELTY CUTLERY THE BANNER OF GOL An Illustrated 16page Monthly Literary and Semi-Sclentific Temperance Journal Tt advocates Inebriate Rescue Work, and is established medium of 300,000 Keeley Cure Graduate It utilizes all reform forces. Subscription Fifty Cents. Sample Copy Fan 400 BOYLSTON BLDG, OHIOAGO, 1) In the middle ages people must have by more time than we do now.” ‘* How's that’| “Well, even if the days weren't longer tel [had more knights." —PAiladelphia Builetin, A $5.00 BOOK FOR $1.00. ‘The Latest and Best Publication on Modern Artistic Dwellings and Other Bulldings of Low Cost. Pattiser’s AMERICAN ARCHITECTURE; Or, Every Man a Complete Builder. BE YOUR OWN ARCHITECT, This book will save you hundreds of dollars if you are thinking bout building a house... Z book, Pallis everybody bul size and sty} no gui Villas, Imaginations. ‘with them, ere is not a builder in the country who can a ADDRESS ALL ORDERS TO at If you are thinkia, y"Palliser's Ai it, fesued on Building. . Nearly but we have determined to make it m demand, to suit the times, so that it can be easily reached by ‘This book contains 104 pages 11214 inches in size, an of large gxt2 plate pages, giving plans, e'evations, per views, descriptions, owners: jess work, and instructions Double his house is costing a great deal more than he calculated it would. build, without proper consideration ; his only foundation Cf building a house you ought te buy the new ure very ‘merican Architect Complete Builder, prepared by Palliser, Palliser & Co., the web Known Architecis. ‘There is not a builder or any one intending to bulld or otherwise interested that can afford to be without it. It best, cheapest and m nl Your hundred drawings’ A $s book & jeet the por 5y all. 14 consis rspectivt actual cost of constr sctioa| How to Build 7oC xtages| Houses, Brick Block Houses, suitable tor cal names "Re amount of information on the erecta of buildings, selection of site, employsed of architects, It is worth $s to any om but Iwill send it in paper cover by aa postpaid, on receipt of $1 ; boos! In cloth, $: you commence. jour first step toward buildi 1ouse, kind of a house you want and 64 out how much it is going to o# before going abead. arrangements on interior, and wou re. ‘Also there is not one in & dred but that will tell you ‘The reason of this is he stars the money he has to build with acd ‘About the time he has his building enclosed his imaginations vanish and his = ‘The value of this work to builders cannot be ¢ as they are called on to build every day in the week. lord to neglect this book. mated, as it contains designs for just such ba JUDGE CO., 110 Fifth Avenue, New Yo comicbooks.com