Judge, 1900-01-20 · page 3 of 16
Judge — January 20, 1900 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces: **"Just As Bad"** (top): A cartoon showing two men in confrontation, with the caption implying they're accusing each other of betrayal. The satirical point appears to be about hypocrisy—both parties are guilty of the same offense, making their moral outrage equally baseless. **"Johnny's Composition"** (center): A humorous article by Tom P. Morgan about a young girl writing a school composition criticizing boys and their immature behavior. The accompanying sketch shows a boy being beaten. It's light social satire on gender relations and childhood. **"A Narrow Escape"** (bottom): Two panels showing someone fishing in a pond while a landowner objects. The humor relies on dialect humor and a pun about nearly drowning in the pond. The page emphasizes domestic social humor rather than political commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JOHNNY'S COMPOSITION. GIRLS are girls till they get to be about sixteen years old. Then they are young women till they reach the age of twenty-three, after which they are girls again till they get married —and the longer that there important event is procrastinated the more girl- ish they become. The sole ambition of girls, from the time they are old enough to think about it till the time when they ought to be old enough to quit thinking about it, is to get married. And when they are married they whirl right in and try to get other people married too. Men ain't that mean ; very few married men have the heart to try to get their feller-men into trouble. Most boys figger on being clowns or train-robbers or sleuths, or some- thing else equally as repulsive, when they grow up, but I don’t; I am going to be an author and write a book about the peculiarities and foibles of the female sect. I am gathering my Lanp-owneR—"' I've no objection to you fishing in my pond to- night, but I'll warn you to keep away from my hen-coop.” Jum—"*All right, sab.” i JUST AS BAD. Dennis—** Was Hogan talking about me behind my back ?” PaT—" No; but he was talking about you behind yer barn.” | Jounsiz Bon—" Gee! ma won't doa thing to me for tearing my new trousers. A NARROW ESCAPE. pond wuz so handy.” Ail i \j rah fe ie 1 iii material now. ‘The book is going to tell all about how girls lead men on to Propose and then throw the harpoon to ‘em just for the fun of seeing ‘em _ squirm, I ambush myself somewhere handy every time I see one of sister's fellers beginning to look sneaky; I can detect the symptoms every clatter —I'm experienced. The other night laid for young Mr. Huggins. He was as badly rattled as an old goose in a hail-storm, and when he got close to the focus he stuttered and gobbled so that I couldn’t make head nor tail out of what he was getting off. 1 kinder forgot myself and stuck my head out from under the sofa, and says I, “Little louder, please! I didn’t ketch that last remark.” Tell you what! Huggins collapsed in great shape; sister yawped, and pa rushed in and snatched me out into the woodshed; and, say, but he strapped me till my tongue hung out! This is all I know about girls. Jum—"* "Twuz a pity to drown de fowls, but it wuz lucky dat de comicbooks.com |