Judge — October 7, 1899 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EVENING CONVERSATION. R. HOHMBODDIE (looking up from his paper)—" These preparations for Dewey day seem to be onan immense Mrs. Hohmboddie (with feeling) —" Poor Mr. Dewey! Poor, poor man’ Mr. Hohmboddie (in puzzled tone)—* Poor?” Mrs. Hohmboddie— Ves, poor. My heart goes out to him. | really think it is a case where the society for the prevention of cruelty to—to children or —or ani mals—I don’t care which—ought to interfere.” Mr, Hohmboddie—" My dear, where does the cru- elty come in?” Mrs. Hohmboddie (indignantly) —" Where? Why, think of dragging that quiet, shrinking man out into the gaze of thousands and making him career and prance and dance about in the public view as if he were some brazen prize-fighter or English novelist giving readings!” Mr. Hohmboddie—" Wut, surely. a warrior who has faced the terrors Dewey has faced will have courage enough ‘— Mrs, Hohmboddie—* Courage! | see you don't even know the mean- Sng of the word. It would be fun—just fun—to that man to face the enemy's bullets or cannon-shots compared with being hurrahed at and TWO NECESSITIES. Newnvwen (visiting in Texas) —" So the first thing a What ts the second ? Narve—" Wa. . a cyclone-proof cellar con paraded at and speeched at, and perhaps little children handing him flowers—maybe grown-up girls kissing him —- goodness knows they're bold enough for anything (think of poor Hob- son!), And there he is, and he can’t get away from it one min- ute sooner than he can.” Mr, Hohinboddie (deprecat- ingly) —" Well, dear, I trust you will not object to our house be- ing decorated a Little on Dewey day, 1, as a Republican "— Mrs, Hohmboddie —" John, 1am astonished at you! 1 in- tend that our house shall be the very handsomest on the block. 1 wish you to understand that I am a patriotic woman, although my father toas a Democrat.” MAbELINE & eaiboEs AT SING SING. Plug Hello, Ugg! Back again, are you? Uegly (with dignity) My constituents felt that my Y Nenvous ra: work warranted a second term.” Deck-HAaND— END OF SEASON. Menaatp (ix excited iwhisper)—"* Murry up, Mayme—quick ! He's just proposing.” NATIONAL SPORT. Se ATU” EXCLAIMED the yankee tourist 1 South America, “a foot-ball game? | ob- serve that you people don’t throw the violence and vigor into the game that we do in the United States. “You are mistaken,” replied his guide. That is the national revolution. It should have taken place yesterday, but was postponed on account of the sickness of some of the leaders.” EXPERIMENTAL, SS YVHERE ate you going, my pretty maid?” “Automobiling, sir.” she said, “May I go with you, my pretty maid 2" * Yes, if you wish, kind sir,” she said, * Do you know how to manage it, my pretty maid?” Not very well, kind sir,” she said. Then T guess I won't go with you, my pretty maid.” obody asked you, sir,” she said. THE SOUL OF FRANKNESS. Old lady—*\C you must play ball in the strect why don’t you go down to the vacant lots in the next block ?* Small boy "Cause there ain't no winders to, break down there. Zee MFG V5 TIRED OF LIFE. GER—"I just heard that old chap muttering to himself that he was tired of life." Well, can’t you see the return-ticket to Philadelphia in his hat? He's going to take the next train back.” comicbooks.com