Judge — September 16, 1899 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AFTER ALL, THERE'S VERY LITTLE DIFFERENCE. HE YEARNED TO KNOW. +4 DA“— once more spoke up little Clarence Callipers, with the rising inflection of one who ear- nestly desires information. “There, my son; that will do for this time,” sternly interrupted his long-suffering sire, whose read- ing had already been often broken into by the insertion of his offspring’s interrogatory gimlet. “1 don’t know who was the meekest woman, nor how many mickles make a muckle, nor how many is many nor how few is a few. nor how a sailor smokes his horn-pipe, nor whether Adam when he saw the first toad thought it was a pocket-book hopping around, nor why Tuesday don’t come on Friday, nor why rabbits can't add, subtract and divide as well as multiply, nor whether Lot's wife was the first well-preserved woman, nor why a boiled owl should get drunker than any other kind of an owl, nor the answer to any one of the many other equally foolish questions that your abnormally-de- veloped bump of inquisitiveness in- cites you to propound. So now, my son, if you do not at once turn off your breath instead of blowing it out, and permit me to proceed in peace with my readin; y you go to bed. Understand ?" “Yes, sir; but, shucks, pa! I don’t want to ask any such foolish questions as those. What | want to know is real sensible and impor- tant.” “Well, then, if the question isn't foolish you may ask it.” “All right, pa. What I wish you would tell me is, when a fat man is self-contained, do you sup- —"* Wife said to get only tested seeds.” SacesMaN—" Here they are. Don’t get them wet.” Stawhus ATHENS WORLD'S FAIR. /—MALD OF ATHENS, Maid of Athens of today, Violet-crow ned, and fair as May, Zee mou, sas agape, ® Goddess of the rosy morn, Modern Venus, ocean-born— Maid of Athens up to date, Keep my heart, and cast my fate! + My life, T love thee! pose he has more room inside of himself to contain himself in than & thin man has, or is himself so big that he is just as tightly crowded inside of himself as the thin man is, and how much of himself is it that is self-contained, and how much is on the outside doing the containing, +0 to bed this instant!" \\ NX SY NN WW eS 2. Mr. Larenome—"* Don't (hic) get seeds wet. Ha, ha!” 3. Mr. Latenome—"' Shay, dear (hic), here's zhose tested seeds.” A GROWING SUCCE! comicbooks.com