Judge — August 5, 1899 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK AT THE JUDQB BUILDING. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA Iie ADVANCA. juding the Cunistaas Juocs. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS —Te alt Sorcign countries in the postal union, $6.00 ‘a year. Evnortan saissacunts—/nternational mews company, Bream's building, Chancery lane, jane's, avenue de Opera, Paris: : ‘Saarbach's news exchange, Mai Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. (©W-Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly in the world. EB NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juoce are protected by copyright in both the United States and Great Britain, Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. G-BUG is friendly, but not sufficiently considerate. THE KISSIN SONG BY HARVARD —" And here 's to good old Yale—throw her down.” L=t US HOPE that Mrs. South- worth, the novelist, has gone to the land of her initials, oes SALVATION Ss FREE, but there is a gigantic trust which wants to fet possession of at. eee THE MILLS of the gods have just ground out a divorce for an: In- diana man one hun- dred and three years old. eee A PICTURE ina Democratic paper of Lincoln, Jefferson and Bry- an might be labeled “Meinself und Tom. and Abe.” oar . MBS. LEA and others say Mr. Gorman will be the Demo- cratic candidate for president in 1900; and really if wishes were norses Mr. Gorman would have a terrific ride. OOSEVELT is for McKinley and the smashing of the Filipinos; so let us trust that the voting for him for the chief office will not begin till after the next national election. eae A CLERGYMAN says it is not wicked to play golf on Sunday after attending church; and we suppose that to clinch the judgment he Il kindly consent to shorten his sermons. eee THE HYPHENATED MAN is not to be condemned too much. The adopted citizen has as much right to love the land that begot him as the land that he proposes to live and die in. The government of France is t . NE BURGLAR insisted on being kissed by the woman he had robbed, and another found a babé choking, informed its mother, and went off without his swag. The asthetics of burglaring must be cultivated. ANTOINETTE STERLING, in a speech in the women's council in London, said that women were too hard on men, and often appreci- ated them only when they were lost. It is encouraging to see this slight fairness to the sex that has long been too harshly treated. MATRIMONIAL DRAWBACKS. Well, the only sure way I can think of is to abolish Dun's and Bradstreet's.” TOO MUCH HASTE. THE TALK Is that Bryan wants to be absolute dictator of the Demo- cratic party, and that therefore he counsels against readmitting such men as Cleveland, Carlisle and Hill. It might be well to wait till they ask for readmission, That is a little formality which courtesy usually requires in these cases. GORMAN AND BRYAN. MB: GORMAN has the backing of the millionaires, but Mr. Bryan-has the enthusiasm and the votes. In the national convention the question will be whether a very slight minority of decorous persons can overcome an overwhelming majority of shouting men. It has never been done, and it never can be. THE NEW COPPERHEADISM. THEY TELL of a Democratic plot to have the war in the Philippines last through next year, with the purpose in view of whipping McKin- ley. Some lives and money would be sacrificed by the success of this plot, but what would such a sacrifice amount to in comparison with the glory of electing a Democratic president ? A COMING MAN THE PROPHET who says that John R, McLean will be governor of Ohio and pres ident of the United States reminds one how easy it is to talk, What Mr. McLean really wants is to be gov- ernor-general of Canada and subsequently king of Eng- land, and he thinks he has the money necessary to the consummation, : \ Lee \S VA a e- TREASON. THE MUGWUMP and the Democratic papers give themselves up to the task of showing that we shall fail in the Philippines and that we ought to fail; and stories of gross cruelty to the enemy and to our own fighters are as thick as strawber- ries in June. It is the old story of the tories and the cop- perheads, and it is as true now as it was forty and a hundred years ago. ~ VA oe ! 1g to devise some way of promoting matrimony.” CAN THEY GOVERN THEMSELVES? G NERAL CHARLES KING says he believes the Filipinos are capa- ble of self-government. One would think that if they were they would give some proof of it by laying down their arms and submitting to what they know, if they know anything, must be the inevitable. A first principle of capability of that kind is the possession of a little common sense. THE INJUDICIOUS FRIEND. : R. PLATT should have thought several times before he indorsed McKinley for a second term. The Democratic and mugwump news- papers are convinced by the indorsement that the president is a bad man and that he has promised Platt all the patronage of the administration that isn’t held by Mr. Hanna. Ah, well; it is impossible for anybody to be saved from every one of his friends. WANTED THE MAN WHO RUNS. THE NAME OF DEWEY was received with silence by a body of anti- expansion mugwumps in Buffalo. Probably that would have been the case if Washington and Lincoln had been mentioned, for were they not connected with bloody struggles too? But if any American officer of the army or navy who had been whipped might have been recalled, what a shout would have gone up for him! comicbooks.com