Judge — July 22, 1899 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

+ PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK AT THE JUDGE BUILDING. One copy. for thirteen weeks « - Including the Cantstaas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS ~Te alt Sorcign countries im the postal union, $8.00 year. Corner Fifth Aveaue and Sixteenth Street, New York. W-Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly in the world. EB NOTICE TO PUBLISIIERS.—The contents of Juoce are protected by copyright in toth the United States and Britain, Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and. vigorously prosecuted. MB: FORAKER frequently remarks between sobs that he is happy too. LET US HOPE. that the Schley-Sampson battle will not bring about a great r eee THE “REST” of Governor Roosevelt resembles that of the farmer who kindly allowed his hands to dig cellar by moonlight. ALFRED AUSTIN says that all poets are sane; and there have been men who held that the only sane men were the insane ones, FUNSTON says he is afraid he wouldn't succeed as supply of girls is as large as it was when Hobson lecturer; but the with us. ESTERHAZY and several other conspirators ought to be unanimously clevted to the vacancy created by Dreyfus when he left his cage. HE MAN in this town who tried to kill himself because he was shabby ought to have considered that he would look shabbier still when he got through. GENERAL MERRITT may hug himself for being an American ¢ zen if he wants to; and how fortunate it is that he has a young w to help him at it. THE GOVERNOR of Kansas needn't call himself a fool for allowing himself to be elected governor. What kind of a fool is he in com- parison with the majority that voted for him? [© !S.NOT possible that Mark Twain was embarrassed when he met the kaiser, The man has met thousands of the voting sovereigns of this country and nev- er turned a hair. [tis Nor KNOWN that Marchand evet did any fighting, but only a dis- creet_ general _ could have got out of the scrape he got into in the Soudan; and he certainly played a fine game of bluff. Ceci In chewing up a large mattress St. Beroard pup on North Carpenter street also chewed up a roll of bills amounting 10 one hundred and seven: ty dollars. Asa de- pository for savings the mattress ap pears to be no safer than the kitehen- stove — Chicago Times Heratd. YES: and the dog is worse than either, HOW KLEVERGUY who stands the most squeezing. MADE HIS FORTUNE AT MANNIT BEACH. Barxer—"'Step right up, ladies, and try the great seaside embracer—only a quarter a throw ! ‘Almost as good as a man—better than a dude. Fisnrrsax—" Oh, for a large, cold bottle !" AMERICAN MONEY ABROAD. NNA GOULD is not as deep in French politics as the yellow news- papers say. In fact, we suspect that if she wants the presidency of the republic she'll simply buy it and consent to the shedding: of not an ounce of blood. Howard Gould will really be in more danger if he buys the lakes of Killarney, for the Irish talk little and tight at the drop of the hat. REFORM? A BOSTON WOMAN proposes to provide women with pockets. It looks as if this reform might fill a long-felt want, but the main thing will be to get women to use pockets after they get them. Already many women are inquiring with much curiosity, “ What is a pocket?” notwith- standing the fact that they have long known where those of their husbands are located. BRYAN THE MAN. TTHE DEMOCRACY of Pennsylvania formally recognize Bryan as their leader. The Democracy of this state would undoubtedly do so if they were to hold a convention to-morrow. The south and west are for him, and it is not too much to say that he grows in popularity every day. This being so, it is difficult to see how Mr. Croker and Perry Belmont are going to nominate Mr.Gorman. They will have to hold a little national conven- tion of their own. ‘ PRISON MORALITY. THE WEEK- LY PAPER called the Star of Hope, printed in Sing Sing pris- on and written entirely by con- viets, is largely devoted to edu- cational purpos- €s, philosophy, and essays on the wisdom of being good. All of these writers evidently were well brought up, but their morali- ty was overcome by evil propensi- ties. One poem tells us not to scorn the con- viet. Perhaps if there had been more scorn of "that person it would have been better for the A prize for the lady L c writer of it. Step right up" comicbooks.com