Judge — March 18, 1899 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“Can we afford,” he faltered sadly, “to have a skeleton in our closet?” As for the woman, she wept, for they were indeed wretchedly poor ; Lut she "was not, therefore, altogether unre- sourceful. ‘* We might keep it in the hall and se it for a hat-rack,” exclaimed the bride; for er mind was giving away under the constant cort to practice economy.— Detroit Journal. A hot-weather beverage —A piece of ice some sugar, lemon, and a bottle of Cook's /m: rial Champagne, extra dry. Every town has a liar or two, a smart Aleck, me pretty girls, more loafers than it needs, woman or two that tattles, an old fogy that ¢ town would be better off without, men who and on street-corners and make remarks about ye women, a man who laughs an idiotic laugh very time he says anything, scores of men with the caboose of their trousers worn smooth as lass, men who can tell you about how the war jwestion should be settled, the weather, and ow to run other people's business, but’ who nave made a dismal failure of their own,— Poughkeepsie News-Press, Clear up your complexion with Abbott’ Original Angostura Witters—best blood-purifier known, ‘Try it. “No, Miss Petherbridge,” said the young man, folding his arms and looking sternly at her; “*you can't be a ‘sister to me.’ If I'm not’ good enough to get into your family you can't get into mine.” Saying which. and pick- ing up his hat and gloves, he walked away with his head held stiffly erect.—Chicago Record, ** Miss Millie, I insist upon an answer, I will not be put off any longer.” ‘Mr, Nog- gins, [ will be your wife eventually, but not till after | have become engaged to Algernon Vere de Vere and jilted him. ‘So much, at least, is rightfully due to the dreams of my girlhood.” Chicago Tribune. ale A Centlemass’ Smoke is the best. pipe tobacco! Being the best— commands the best price, and yet It costs but a trifle more than the ordinary kinds that bite the tongue and smoke “hot.” “ When you use it you'll realize the difference. ‘Size 8.x 1034 inches ‘er 900 juable information indis- tle toneiahiieay hovelas C and boarding vi early 4,000 5 ‘Dest and most com- Baietecen crn, rae Gee nus, bills of fare, the easons, the market, etc. find in one }, octavo volume of over 900 \4somi oul cloth. "Burnished sages’ en Price, $2.50 THE WERNER COMPANY, Publishers, YORK. ‘CHICAGO. AKRON, 0. Is Charlie a man to be trusted?” IT know. But would you trust him with five dollars ?"—Baltimore Life, Whatever is in style is right.—Talent knows what to do; tact knows what not todo —The only true happiness consists in getting out of trouble — Never explain; any blunder worth the name explains itself —Aronsate Thomas vat, The superiority of the Sohmer pianos is rec- ognized and acknowledged by the highest mu- sical authorities, and the demand for them is steadily increasing in all parts of the country. * You took me for better or for worse,” cried Henry Peck, "* Oh, no, my dear,” replied Mrs, Peck sweetly. ‘* You took me for better and I took you for worse."—Philadelphia North American. Circumstances alter cases. Slippers are com- fortable or uncomfortable, according to what part of the body they ate applied.— Boston Transcript, The police authorities of Louisville who de- clined to hold an inquest on a pugilist because he was “ killed at his trade” are not sufficiently specific. Was the man killed by a blow, or was he talked to death?—Phrladelphia Ledger. Smith—" What kind of business is Brown engaged in?” Jones—* Pneumatic, I think.” Smith—"* Pneumatic? Why, I never heard of a business like that.” Smath— it is, he's running it on win 50c Quality Full Fashioned Hosiery 25 Cents a Pair. Ladies’- Men's- Misses'- Boys’ iery means made 1 lines of the foot stubborn coughs, col begin to bel ing.—Albany Argus. sicians for puri genuine—Dr, $ Dr. Ball's Cough Syrup cures the most lds and lung affections. Even incipient consumption has been successfully cured by this marvelous remedy. Sufferers will obtain relief after a few doses. When Krupp turns his gun-plant into an agricultural-implement factory the world will ve that an era of peace is dawn- Angostura Bitters is indorsed by leading phy- and wholesomeness. Get the jegert’s. Chappie—"* 1 ask you for the last time to pay me that five dollars you owe me.” “Thank goodness! there's an end to that silly question.”"— Boston Globe, First legislator—"* Vow do you stand on this, Proposed bill to abolish free lunch?” legislator —"* I'm for it all right if they will {nsert a provision that it shall not take effect until the end of the session."—/ndianapolis Journal, Husband (whose wife has been struck by the T'd trust him with my life." Jack—! automobile carriage)—" Heavens, man! why don't you look where you're going? A little more and it's me you would have run down in- stead of my wile." —Z' /llustration, Cholly— Second “1am told,” said Stoatly as he consulted the famous specialist, “*that you know of an infallible treatment for the cure of obesity.” ‘That is perfectly true.” “May I ask how you acquired this great knowledge?" ** Cer- tainly, I was connected with the commissary department during the late war."—Philadel- phia Record, Crimsonbeak—"" It doesn’t seem exactly right tocall talk * gas.’ Yeast—"" Why not?” Crim. sonbeak—"" Because they say talk is cheap."— Yonkers Statesman. Wayworn Watson —"* Dey call a guy dat steals when he don't hafto a kleptomaniac, don't dey?" Perry Patetic—"* Dat's. what.” Wayworn Watson—"*1 wonder what kind uv a maniac is a feller what works when he don't hafto?"—Cincinnati Enquirer, Many fellows who think they owe their ap- pearance to their clothes are really most indebt- ed to their tailor.—Rechester Post Express. ** Wasn't it cheeky of you, old fellow, to kiss her without permission?’ ‘Oh, no, She fur- nished the cheek.""—Philadelphia Bulletin, It is easy enough to die game; the difficult thing is to live game.— New York Evening Sun. WILLIAMS ing Soap used here,” be sure of a all, you are shaving soaps. When you see that sign on a barber shop “Williams? Shav- ‘ow need not hesitate to enter. You may comforting refreshing shave. Above lc from the dangers whi WILLIAMS’ SHAVING SOAPS are used by all first-class barbers and are for sale all over the world. The J. B. Williams Co., Glastonbury, Conn. Depots: London, Paris, Dresden, Sydney. ich lurk in cheap, inferior and leg, so thatit sivas fits like aglove and never loses that shape-keeping quality), In- stead. we imported expensive knitting ma- Chines and employed skilled workmen trained in the best foreign hosiery factories, with the result that we make hosiery.which, {fimport- das iy. could not be sold for less than Sects. thatwe can sell at26 cents a pair! For Sale y@ Deal ers Everywhere. Look for “WAYNE KNIT MATCHLESS ” ped on each pale. Insist on your dealers supplying you. ifhe does not keep them send is name; we will see that you and he are supplied, Sample pair, one pair only to any person, 26 cents. Send size wanted. If you don’t want hosiery just now, send us your own and your dealer's name on a postal and we will send qo0 a ary nstractive: book telling how the celebrated Wayne Knit Match Me full fashioned Soc hose are made at ase per pair. ITTING MILLS, FT. WAYNE, IND. SLSLS SSL LS SSL “THE COLORADO ROAD” That is the popular name for the Colorado and Southern Ry., which comprises all the lines formerly operated as the U, P., D, and G. Ry. (“Gulf Road”), and D.'L; and G, Ry. (South Park Line). It is essentially a Colorado institution, second in point of equipment and service to no railroad in the country. The most satisfactory line between Denver, Colorado Springs, Pueblo, Trinidad, Leadville, and ail other commercial centres and health and pleasure resorts. Reaching the most picturesque portions of picturesque Colorado, and offering the most fascinat- Ing trips in the world for tourists, ert wanth we shall bare a vamber of attractive and letereting bls and pampbiets ce Onlorade, whi wil Nermratiseed lator fot paper, aed we sail bw plad to Sive you sod for tens of theo” T. E. FISHER, General Passenger Agent, DENVER, COLORADO. THE CELEBRATED SOHMER HEADS THE LIST or THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS. It is the favorite of the artists and the refined musical public. SOHMER & CO., Piano Manufacturers ‘New York Warerooms, SOHMER BUILDING FIFTH AVENUE, COR. 220 STREET. Six Trains Daily for Chicago-NEW YORK CENTRAL. comicbooks.co