Judge — December 3, 1898 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

widge. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK AT THE JUDGB BUILDING. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. MFTED STATES AND CANADA TH ADVANCE. One copy, one year, of 52 numbers =~ $5.00 One copy, six monthes or 36 numbers = 3.80 One copy, for thirteen weeks = ncloding the Conssraas J FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTION: untries im the postal ui ‘de C Opera, ‘Corner Fifth Avenue a Sixteenth Street, New York. EW-Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly in the world. E97 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juce are protected by copyright In both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted, THE LUCK IS WITH TEDDY, and he made it himself. eee NOBODY expects tears from Governor Hill, but Mr. Croker's pump is working itself. THE SCIENCE under which Harold Frederic died is the least scientific of «any in the world. see M*-. CROKER won over Hill in the convention, but the people won over him at the bal- lot-box. MDL 3 TONNES THINGS ARE GETTING themselves into excellent shape for Mr. McKinley in nine- teen hundred. M®- ANTHONY just previous to his marriage—“I have the honor to report that I am go- ing to be blown up some more.” 'HE PLAN of General Miles for reorganizing the army is doubtless good, but he must begin by reorganizing the lead- ers of it. COLONEL WARING hadn't been over there five min- utes before he began to investi- gate the streets of the new Je- rusalem. SEVERAL PERSONS who stood in the way of the dowager empress of China have unaccountably died; but it is only fair to say that other em- presses have done better who”—— ‘OWE HAVE taken an empire,” says Dewey. If we are generous enough to give away an empire, why not be awfully good and surrender the United States? ** (CROWS undoubtedly have a language,” says a scientific journal, We don’t know about that; but lots of people think since election that they are mighty poor for sustenance. x E HAVE SYMPATHY for the young man of West Virginia who is suing his sweetheart for biting off his tongue; but why didn’t he take the old advice to hold that implement? AN ALABAMA MOB express regret for having lynched the wrong man, If the friends of the deceased should lynch one of the mob they couldn't possibly make a mistake like that. ‘A PAPER in Canada and another in Tennessee want Grover Cleveland to be a national senator from New Jersey, and even the Albany Journal speaks for him, Some day, perhaps, New Jersey will think of it herself. A MASTERFUL TACTICIAN, Mrs, Frost—" What! you low-down, ill-bred apology for a Darwinian specimen of manhood! do you dare have the hardihood and suicidal temerity to talk back to one Sty SLocum—"* No, lady. Even to me dull comprehension de overpowerin’ sense uv your forensic superiority. culture, refinement. generosity, an’ last, but not least, beauty, chokes off any uncomplimentary or derogatory remarks w'ot might "—— Mrs. Frost—" Now you're talking sense. What will you eat?" REFORM BY ROPE. A REFORMER of St. Louis wants the wickedest man in every ward hanged on the first of January every year, and wants the people of the wards to select the men by ballot. If this plan were to be generally adopted there wouldn't be enough mugwumps left to make a ticket. LET US BREATHE AGAIN. SEVERAL WAR-VESSELS have been launched and there has been no war, These vessels were baptized with champagne, and yet no army of prohibitionists took up arms to prevent that consummation. Probably a large majority of our people prefer peace, but the launching of every war-vessel is attended with a period of great national peril. THE DOG .IN THE MANGER. ‘THE SCOUNDRELISM OF BLANCO in refusing to receive red-cross vessels loaded with supplies, while thousands of inoffensive citizens were starving, capped the climax of Spanish meanness and cruelty. The redemption of Havana has been too long postponed. It is a pity that this platant rascal, who still wants to fight, cannot be given the opportunity. WHY? = THE HONOR paid the sultan by the German emperor is misplaced. Gladstone spoke of the former as the great assassin, and that is the verdict of the Christian world. Does official courtesy go so far that a decent ruler may wet his lips with the blood on the hand of a royal murderer and not be ashamed of it? Is gain to come from that humiliation? Well, well! THE LUXURY OF GRIEF. WHY SHOULD MARK TWAIN call for a theatre to be given up wholly to trag- edy? Is it a reaction from the jocund mirth which fills half his life? Must he have grief by way of a recompense for his contin- uous joy? Has he saddened of his good humor and must he sup on horror by way of a proper balance? One tragedy a year is all the most of us can easily en- dure. THE APPROPRIATE VESSEL. THE QUESTION was dis- cussed at a local temper- ance convention, “Can a wearer of the white ribbon with propri- ety carry to a picnic cold tea, milk or lemonade in a beer-bot- tle?” and the question was de- cided in the negative. It is in- evitable that the stuff must be carried in wrapping-paper, be- cause all kinds of vessel are frequently used for the convey- ance of deleterious beverages. RICHARD'S RESPONSIBILITY. R. CROKER put up a stick in opposition to the livest, ablest, honest- est, best all-around man in the country, if not-in the world, The stick was loaded with the free-silver foolishness and the old Democratic copperheadism in a new shape. It was powerless to go up like a rocket or anything else, and it came down before its ascension, There was there- fore no fair fight, and Mr. Croker can thank himself for it JUSTICE FOR LEGITIMATE TRADE. HE QUESTION is asked by the New York Sun, “Why should the people rush frantically to further the interests of the men of whom they buy liquor or beer? Is there any such rush to increase the profits of the grocers or the butchers, or the other traders from whom they buy?” Let us barely suggest that the people—and what a large number of them there are!—have in view their own consolation and satisfaction. They want to be sociable on Sunday, when they have the necessary time. But, outside of this, is there any reason why they should not be as sensitive to the rights of the butcher and the grocer as to those of the man of the _ pleasing but destructive beverages? comicbooks.com