Judge — October 15, 1898 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THEIR PHILANTHROPY, ¢*(CHARITABLE?” re- peated the landlord of the tavern at Polkville, Arkansas, in response to the inquiry of the tourist. “ Yo" bet, the people yere are as charitable as they are any place up'nawth. Why, lem- me tell yo’ what's a fact, Mr. Nepean lenis ARMY NOTE. around ‘a spell ago that the ¥ Widder Oggy an’ her three half-grown boys an’ two girls a MIXED MANNERS. was in need of help, an’ a RS. MAUSER was expecting company to tea, and she said to her donation-party was caucus- little daughter Annie, who was afflicted with a violent cold in her ed up to pervide fer ‘em. head, “Don’t speak to anybody, dear, unless you are spoken to; and if Everybody gave suthin’, an’ you have to sneeze be sure and turn away your head,” the result was sech a lib- In telling of the occasion afterward Annie said, “And mamma told eral supply of the neces- me to be good, and if anybody spoke to me just to turn away my head sities of life that the boys and sneeze.” took an’ sold enough hams an’ flour an’ dried fruit, an’ so on, the next day to buy three new ‘possum-dogs, a red silk han‘kerchief apiece, a sto’ Hat trimmed with hollyhocks fer each of the girls, a fine picture of Jeff'son Davis fer the old lady, an’ whisky enough to git so drunk that they whipped five men an’ a deputy-sheriff befo” they was took an’ flung into the calaboose. Yo" bet, the people yere are as charitable as they are in any place.” SHORTER AND LONGER. SHORT bicycte-skirts that women doa If wrong might still be wronger. Women look shorter with them on, But then the men look longer. POINTS IN COMMON. Great editor—"\ am afraid | haven't time to read your poem on the Cuban reconcentrados. How are you qualified to write anything on those people? You were never in Cuba. How can you appreciate their condition?” i o i HALF DEAD. Poet— Appreciate their condition? Why, rou say that man in the striped bathing-suit is half dead? He acts very frisky for a man man! haven't they been starving?” in that condition."” ion. HaroLp—"* Oh, it’s his better half that is dead, you know.” “ hy, Tyg PO ance ir W A PARADISE, Fiy—"* Hi, fellers! come on, Here's a old cow wid a stub tail.” comicbooks.com