Judge, 1898-10-08 · page 7 of 16
Judge — October 8, 1898 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several Victorian-era satirical cartoons mocking social pretensions and contemporary issues: **"What She Wanted"** contrasts a poor girl's modest need (ten cents of bologna sausage) with her extravagant wishes (seal-skin jacket, diamond ring, yacht, foreign nobleman)—satirizing both children's materialism and class aspiration. **"The Worm Turned"** jokes about a woman rejecting a man claiming to be her lost heir because he *does* have the identifying strawberry-mark—inverting expectations through absurdist logic. **"One Shall Be Taken"** appears to critique military hero-worship, noting that while one sailor receives celebration and promotion, his seven fellow sailors who died receive no recognition, questioning arbitrary heroism. The remaining cartoons ("Bennie Cracks One," "The One Thing Lacking," "Unexpected Resistance") are brief humor vignettes about mustaches, jokes, and a street confrontation. The page reflects Judge's satirical focus on American social hypocrisy, class anxieties, and military/naval matters circa early 20th century.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Sig WHAT SHE WANTED. +¢]S THERE anything you want?” asked the butcher of the little girl with the soulful eyes and fawn-like air. “Oh, yes, sir,” lisped the little angel timidly. “I want a seal-skin sacque, and a di'mond ring, and_a trotting-horse, and a steam-yacht, and a foreign nobleman, and a pug-dog, and a brown-stone house, and a box at the opery, and lots of other things; but all ma wants is ten cents’ worth of bologna-sausage for'dinner, and won't you please trust her for it till Saturday night?” NEW VERSION. LITTLE drops of water, Little grains of “* sand,” Make our mighty navy Feared in every land. THE WORM TURNED. ¢oTHERE js one way I can surely tell f you are the long-lost heir,” said the dignified matron “to'the applicant for restitution to the family. circle. “Have you a strawberry-mark on your left arm, just below the shoulder?” “T have,” calmly and fearlessly replied the man. “Ab, then you are not my son.” “ONE SHALL BE TAKEN,” ETC. E,IGHT sailors elected to do or to die, ‘And the odds greatly favored the latter; Bat they none of them died and they each of them did, For they only were doing just as they were bid, And the rest of it what did it matter? But one of them was chosen a hero to be, And was raised to the seventh heaven ; He was kissed by the women and cheered by the men, Was féted and sated, promoted, and then— Bat, my countrymen, what of the seven? Guoncs sraDexrm, THE ONE THING LACKING, BENNIE CRACKS ONE HIMSELF. Patsy—'* Jimmy, wot do de gals find ter admire in dose milingtary chaps, I wonder?” sik aly 3 5 Jimmy—""lt’s deir mustarchers, Patsy; deir mustarchers. If I had one dat bloke wouldn't be fa Sad¥e—"Bennie, what's a dry joke? Bennie—“ One of pop's wet-weather prophecies.” UNEXPECTED RESISTANCE. Cor—"* Murther! me hand 's paralyzed.” Cor—"'I'll give dat sleepy hobo a welt thot he'll niver fergit.” (Bif//) WRARY CITIZEN (oildly)—"* Say, cop, ef you've broken me wooden leg it'll cost yer a month’s pay.”