Judge — August 13, 1898 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A FEW NOTES OF THE GAME. INGER is the noise made by the home team; when made by the visiting nine it is rowdyism. Winning in a walk is by numerous runs. The short-stop is selected for his long head. A bat in the hand is worth a dozen in a saloon. Virtue is the umpire’s only reward, and as a rule he misses that. The trouble with pitchers is in going to the bad oftener than to the well. Home runs are like the visits of poor relatives—they rarely happen when wanted. Policemen are not on the grounds in such large numbers to run in the base- stealers, but to guard the diamond. The difference between a player and a magnate is that the player plays the game for his salary, while the magnate plays the player for the box-office, HIS FUNERAL. ALL MODERN EQUIPMENTS. Emptover—"'I hear you were at the bill-game yesterday. You told me when you asked ss to get off that you were going to your brother-in-law’s funeral.” Visitor (at New England seaport town) —“ Aren't Cuerk—‘ Yes, sir. That new pitcher they. tried yesterday was my brother-in-law, and they you afraid some hostile fleet will bombard your town?” knocked him out of the box in the first inning.” Native—" Not a bit of it. We've got a : company of twenty- ze ee i INSPIRED BY four home-guards, and : = y. >> HOPE. they've got a flag-sig- ~f JZ F nal code for day-time g 3 ge A SsPor: ss and a flash-light sys- } - 2 Ta Yes? tem for night.” s “If Cuba gets an ye ee ma 7 - : Si ; independence-day will fees = % se ite celebrated in the BUSINESS. 2 ze rn = *S United States too?” Se PONT I have to : A sien 2 nae = THE LAST again?” asked the long- : : iously. y 2 ; Jaggles —"Why “No, sir,” replied ROS < Z isn’t it as bad to abol- the mustering officer. ish the army canteen “What else do you ‘ as to cut off the sail- apo pret he ’ A PAINFUL MISTAKE. oe PS “The pay-roll, sng NUE UME (lo his swift, who has been bewildered by a breaker)—"* Loosen up on them whiskers, thar, oa60 shat is depriv a + 'Mandy! Gol swan it! whatter ye up tew?" priving sir. Aunt ’MANDY—" Hevvinly day, Jubal! I thought I hed bolt of th’ life-line.” Jack of his gill.” AT THE HATTER'S. “Ant hi i i , a i eetih eice tat looks so nice I shall have to get a nice hair-cut 2S Gpacsons | coe Vitara Oneealaee ee comicbooks.com