Judge, 1898-08-13 · page 5 of 16
Judge — August 13, 1898 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes **the installment-plan purchasing system** that had become widespread in America. The central joke is that people buy everything on credit—houses, furniture, bicycles—and become so habituated to this debt that they're metaphorically dying "by installment," even joining churches to progress toward death "on the installment plan." Secondary items mock: - **Spanish-American War military strategy**: A character criticizes the Navy for firing expensive ammunition rather than continuing profitable "prizes" (captured ships). - **Immigration**: Dialect humor from "Uncle Eben" and German-accented speakers reflects period stereotyping of immigrant communities. - **Spain's military prospects**: A brief poem suggests Spain's situation is so hopeless they'd miss peace if they aimed for it. The cartoons use exaggeration and wordplay typical of *Judge*'s satirical approach, targeting contemporary consumer culture and military inefficiency rather than specific political figures.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
SYD 2 NEW COMPLAINT. ; ae BARCAIMS " Yes,” said idr. Upnite with VU APD = MAND a sigh,“ Iam afraid it is all over f y > 5 with poor old Clayfoot. For the past two years he has simply passed from one sickness to another, growing weaker with every attack, until now he is completely exhausted and at death's door.” “ Where is he living now?” asked a doctor who was of the party. “In Upagannsett, New Jer- sey. He bought a house and lot out there a couple of years ago on the installment plan, and "— “ Pardon me,” interrupted the doctor with some show of interest, “but I think your friend's case belongs to a new class that the medical profession is just becoming familiar with, Did he not furnish his house on the installment plan also?” “Yes,” replied Mr. Upnite wonderingly. LOSING MONEY, “* Dose beebles ad Vashington don'd know noddings.” had's der madder vid ‘em ?” shoost loog ad ‘em having der ships fire egspensive ammunition ad forts! Vhy didn’t dey make ‘em keep on taking brizes ?” foot is a victim of the installment habit. People who are afflicted in that way even go so far as to pay their debt to nature on the installment plan. They usually begin by having some mild ailment, from which they pass to worse and more deadly complaints, until they finally die by installment. In particularly virulent cases.they have even been known to join the Roman Catholic church; so that they could progress from purgatory to glory on the installment plan.” AND AT THE TOP FOR A HAYSTACK. Uncle Eben— He, be, he! Things must be funny in China. Jest been readin’ a piece ‘bout the place. It says they live jest opposite from us, down on the under side of the earth.” Vhile 1 go ouit, Shonny, you fix dem sausages in der 7 Aunt Samantha—" Yes; but why should that make it a queer place?” vinder,' “And if Iam not mistaken he also rides a bicycle Uncle Eben —* Why, which he bought on the installment plan.” great cornstalks! think of it. “Why, yes; but what has that to do with his ill- Wr ‘They'd have ter begin at the ness?" WA RAYA bottom in diggin’ a well down “Everything in the world. Your friend Mr. Clay there.”* THIS IS SO. SPAIN 's right to fight, though hope is gone, That fact we can elicit ; For if the Spaniards aimed at peace They would be sure to miss it. SO THEY DO. ‘OTHE flag-pole market has been made quite active by the war,” remarked Mr, Cawker. “The poles come high too,” replied Mr. Cumso, who had bought one. A WOMAN'S letter with the usual lengthy postscript is re like the youngster’s WANTESRADISE, ; definition of a snake— Souprette— Is there good bathing here?” SUMMER-HOTEL CLERK —* The very best—six miles of “puthin’, with a tail plank-walk and no police regulations.” to it.” comicbooks.com