Judge — April 30, 1898 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

288 Suage HIS AUTHORITY. +e] OOK here,” said the policeman to a small merchant, ‘‘you can't sell goods that way without a | {il= feck license to peddle. ig 33 B “Look at that,” replied the merchant, as he drew from his pocket a bicycler’s tax-receipt. ‘What is that if it isn’t a license to pedal?” QUITE SOUND. GENUINE aristocracy Of practical utility Is, paying cash for all you get. This is the true no-bill-ity. IN GOOD STANDING. Grandmother (in the country) —‘*Do you belong SHE LOST HER KEY. to the society of the revolu- Miss Padlock, so pretty, tion I hear spoken of so oft- Was singing a ditty, en?” Mande. ee Florence (honestly) — She said. * with my song “Yes, grandma ; I've ridden Rook-KEErER (to the new office-boy)—"* My boy, Lhave had For want of the key I have dropped.” a bicycle for two years.” my nose to the grindstone for over fifty years.” y (And the boy is wondering what it must have been before he commenced grinding.) YY GIRL. When Rose for calling is array- ed, In modish gown and nod- ding plume, She's such a bonny, winsome THIS. FICKLE WEATHER. NE warm spring day young Cholly Soak, Whé on his wheel does dote, Redeemed his bike at uncle dear's 5 And hocked his overcoat. maid, T call her then my Rose in Alas, alas for Cholly Soak ! bloom. The warm spell quick.did cease. But when upon her wheel she He could not ride, he had no coat, spins, And now he rests in peace. Merry, and in the best of Me LANDAUKGH WILSON, humors ; My admiration then she wins, And I call her my Rose in bloomers. CAROLYN WRLLS. GETTING IN LINE. Lem—"T'm a purty ol’ dog, but T reckon I kin learn new tricks.” Lucindy —** Fer Jan's Lem! What you doin’ with all them bisickl Lem —"I've gi'n up hoss-tradin’, IMPROVEMENT. ‘+ARE you getting ahead in your bicycle learning?” said Amy to Mabel. “Getting ahead? I'm doing better than that. That is the positive form, while I have reached the j comparative. I often get a header.” 2 WE USUALLY find people kind and ‘A CHAINLESS WHEEL. good if our preconceptions of them were not too flattering. A RESPITE, se AH, THERE'S noth- ing like the bicycle. I've been unable to sleep for years, and "— “You rode a wheel and it cured you?” “No; but a wheelman ran into me and I was in- sensible for several min utes. REASON ENOUGH. Nellie —**1 can't see, : S WE FIND THINGS Tu.DAY. Jack, why they call Doug- “Please run, quick, and take off that lass seminary a match- _ bicycle-suit, dear. Just got this telegram. factory." That wealthy old aut of mine is coming to The arrival of aunt. ax, Hiss visit us—be here any minute. She's so very _ _Jack—"I'sco-educa- —_gid.fashioned, you know, it would never do 5 tional, you see. to shock her.” comicbooks.com